"Your Dying... But I love you..." - (Chapter 200 onwards)

Chapter 384 - "Deadlines..."

Chapter 384 - "Deadlines..."

Clara's PoV

After John was named her official Dad it was really exciting, but i did t really have time in my day to think about it.

In all honesty - I didn't have much time in my day to think about anything.

Mid December came around and it got very stressful.

We all know what it's like around exam and coursework time, but I was one of the last to finish.

'You are coming to my dance show tonight right Clara? It just wouldn't be the same if you didn't' Lilly pouted.

'What about Autumn? I've got no babysitter if we're all at the show'

'Bring her with you' she shrugged.

'Well I've got a presentation this afternoon - what the hell am I going to do with her?' I mumbled trying to decide on all my options.

John was in an exam all day. Richard was at work and Lilly had rehearsals all day for the show tonight.

I have essays coming out of my ears, a presentation to do and work this afternoon.

'Doug's free? I'm sure he'll be happy to help?'

'Umm. I don't know lil'

'He's not Lola Clara. He's not going to take her and jump off a roof with her'

'I know. But -- In fact scrap that plan' I said suddenly getting an email which couldn't have been more well timed. 'She's going to nursery instead'

'She's been accepted? God how are you going to afford that?'

'I'll find a way. She has to go somewhere. And next year she'll be in nursery all the time I hope. God I'd better be quick. She has to be there for 9 and my presentation is at 10' I said suddenly throwing things together and trying to work it all out in my head.

I was trying to remember my lines and what stuff Autumn would need for the day - plus trying to mentally think up a plan for my essay I needed to write later on.

'Whoa. Clara. Don't you think your taking on too much again?'

'Nope. I'll be fine. Bottles. Milk. Toys and nappies? That's all she'll need for the day' I shrugged, throwing them all in the bag and putting her in the car seat.

'Whoa. What's the rush?' Richard scoffed as I bumped into him in the common room as I was running around and had armfuls of stuff.

'Got a presentation today, then I have o work this afternoon. Also got to finish this essay on my break and on the bus and Autumn has her first day of nursery' I said all in one breath, bending down to sift everything into my bag once again, not before clashing hands with Richard.

'I've got it' he said awkwardly, as he helped me pack the bag again and stood up. 'Do you need a head with anything?'

'Umm. No. Don't think so. It's all under control' I nodded.

'Then why are you still wearing your pyjamas?' He questioned.

'I'm no-- oh shit I haven't showered' I whined. 'I'm going to smell now' I pouted annoyed.

'I'll take Autumn to nursery if you want? Help you out?'

'You've got to work Richard. I can't always ask for your help. I can't always rely on everyone else in this house. She's my daughter. My problem' I mumbled.

'Your going to give yourself a mental breakdown again. Or a panic attack. Just calm down'

'I'm not a saint Richard. I'm not the first person at 19 to have a baby. Please just forget it okay? I'll be fin--'

I was cut off awkwardly by Richard stepping closer and pressing a finger up against my lips.

'I'll take Autumn to nursery. Just give me the address. And you go and get in the shower. We wouldn't want you smelling for the day' he chuckled.

- - -

I felt pretty guilty about not going to take my own daughter to her first day of nursery but I had to relent because it was a really important presentation and I couldn't not be there for it.

And I had to ask him to pick her up at 4 because I was working until 6, and then the stupid dance show of Lilly's that I promised I would go to.

So my life was literally rocking down hill.

'I'm going to see the little dude Clara. Autumn's coming with me alright? Louise is in town and I figured I would go see him?'

'That's fine. Whatever. As long as she comes back safely' I said hanging up quickly because I only had a half an hour break at half three and really needed to get a lot more of this essay done than I already had.

'Knock knock' a voice said as I looks up and then back down at the screen. 'Pft. Well hello to you too?' John scoffed.

'Yeah. Hi'

'I come all the way here in my break to see you and that's all I get? A hello?'

'How was your exam?'

'Probably walked it. I'll find out in January' he shrugged. 'What are you doing? Aren't you supposed to be having a break?'

'Writing my essay. Need to get it done. Due in on Friday'

'Where Autumn then?'

'Richards got her. Took her to nursery and then took her to Louise's with him'

'Nursery?'

'Oh yeah. It was her first day of nursery. Got the email this morning. I knew I was supposed to text you something' I mumbled to myself then went back to frantically typing at the laptop.

'Right. Well can I get you away from that thing for 10 minutes? I did come all the way here to see you' he said, grabbing my hands and prying me away from the laptop.

'John, I really need to work' I scoffed, as he slammed the lid down and looked me in the eye.

'You haven't looked up once since I got here. If you had - you would have noticed that I had bought you some food? You need to eat'

'Not as much as I need to do this essay' I scoffed at him, trying to open the lid but was cut up, him throwing the sandwich at me.

'Your not going back out there until you eat'

'I need to work to pay the nursery John. Now please move' I snapped at him, pushing him out of the way and back into the bookshop.