Okay, I have no way of starting this other than saying, I'm addicted to Undertale again. What is this, my third time? I was addi ted back when Jack played it. Then a few months after that, and again now. I'm listening to the soundtrack now as I write this. And I'm eating Ritz. And I'm cold. And watching James play Dark Souls 3. I'm doing nothing right now. Simply taking a break. A break from games. A break from writing. A little break from life. Just for a little. Not all day, but a few hours at most. Until the end of this Update at least.
Anyway, so I want to say something. All the Updates that are here are really just 4/5ths of them. The other 5th is not on paper. I speak them in my own time. When I am alone really. And that isn't allways. I plan to put them in as an Update, but I don't do it. The few times I do do it, they don't really go well. They always seem to stray way off track, almost on purpose. I'll have to look into that. Anyway, the reason I'm bringing this up is because I made this big speech like Update a few hours ago. Well, it wasn't a speech. More of a long Update. Anyway, without a further adu, here was that Update, I hope.
So the unexpected happened today, or was it yesterday, I don't know. Anyway, the unexpected happened. I was bribed, by my mother. It was unexpected, as I'm saying. She said she would get me a phone, if I went to school. Does that count as a bribe? Hold on, I'ma look it up. Yeah it would count as one. Anyway, so right now, if I go to school, I will get a phone. I suspect or Christmas, for that's coming up in about 2 months. Anyway, so right now I've made that phone into my plans, but that's like Plan D territory. I have contengincies. I'm not putting anything onto that. Just the basics. Writing and all that in Plan D. Anyway, so if this phone does end up existing then I will need a job. Something like McDonalds, or some other place, NOT Burger King. I can't go there without my stomach trying to do back flips and nosedives, and barrel rolls. Anyway, if I get the phone, I would need a job, quickly. I still need a job quickly. I'm not waiting for my next birthday to come around, then get a job. Right now, my plan is, if I get a phone, after the Christmas season I'm getting a job. So that way when the phone bill comes around I can give Mah some money to pay mine. With the phone I ca write and watch anime without having to be on the computer. (And by now I have switched it to the phone, which is not really the main focus of what the Update was. Now, let's push it to what it was,) Anyway, so I then thought of something. Something Jannessa said recently. I feel like she tried to tell me something, but then overwrote it with the next thing she said. This happened when I brought up something she said to me. That I deserve better her. Anyway, she said after that Update went up something esle. I responded, then I believe she told me why she
thinks that everyone deserves better than her. She said that she's a bad person, and that bad things keeps happening. I believe, I don't know for sure, so do not think that what I say is fact, it is more of a theory. I believe that what she meant by that was that only bad things happen to her, which make her a bad person. I didn't think of this at the time, and when we were talking she then said that bad things always happen and so do good things, then she said that she didn't want to talk about it. If what I think is the truth, and that she was trying to say that only bad things happen to her, or mostly happen, but she got hurt by something and ran away from that pain by what she followed that up with. I wish I had thought of this back then. It's been like a week. Anyway, I'm saying this now so I can tell you, and think about it some more. Maybe even get your thoughts on it. And then I got to thinking, when and if I get a phone, and I tell you this, it could promote (big if, BIIIGGG if) Jannessa (again BBBIIIGGG if, see that is Italic, Bold, and Underlined,) to talk to me using the call of phones. Sorry, I couldn't help but call it that. Anyway, that way there would possibly be a marginally bigger chance of her talking to me. But that is just a thought. And if htat were true, then I would be able to help her a little more. These Ritz suck. Yet I still eat them. Anyway, if that were to happen, then that would give me ever so slightly more chances to talk to her, and try ot help her out of whatevver dark pit that is telling her that only bad things happen to
her. yes, I know that a lot of people think that only bad things happen. I've been there, and every now and then I'm there again. But Jannessa, either knowingly, or unknowingly, helped me out of it when I was deep within it. So I want to help her out of it, and let her see that not only bad things happen. I want to pull her out of that pit and help her on her way to a better mood. To help her see that there are many more good things than bad that happen everyday. Sometimes, and I've been there many a time, our brains (when overflowing with negative energy) see the small good things and turn them against us and into bad things. I've been there, and sometimes I see it. And this song fits the mood. I see it, and I make myself see that not everything is bad. I want to let her see that too. Yes, I know that it will be hard, really hard if need be. But it will be something that I won't give up trying to do. Janenssa matters a lot to me, and not hleping her is pretty much a crime to myself.
Okay, sorry, I had to wash some dishes. My hands and fingers are soft. Anyway, so if I am true here, then I should try to read between her lines more often. Other than that, then I will try to help her. But I have no way to know if I'm true or was just thinking to much into it. The only way I cn know is if Jannessa says I am, or gives me a suttle hint. YES! MY FAVORITE SONG! Sorry, didn't mean to yell. Sorry. Anyway, other than that I'm guessing in the dark.
That should be the Update I did last night. If not less. I love this song. It's Hopes And Dreams. A song that comes at the end of Undertale, well, an ending. Anyway, that would be all I have to say. So, goodbye.
