outside. everyone's outside. i love the outside. why am i outside? well, a concert thing came around and we are all outside. everyone's outside. to be honest i don't really care. what i do care about is the chance to talk to Jannessa. outside makes me much, much more calmer then i usually am. i saw Jannessa three times. when i was holding the door open, when she in a crowd, and when in front of a booth thing. I had a chance to talk to her when I was holding the door open, but i didn't. why? i don't really know myself. all i want to do is talk to Jannessa. i was in the crowd looking for her, but now i'm sitting outside the concert. i want to do one thing, and i can't accomplish that. I Wish I Could Have More Courage To Talk To Her.
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ah poo. i was going to publish this and hopefully Jannessa would see, and try and find me...now that i say this it sounds really dumb. Jannessa come find me? what am i thinking, she wouldn't even think of that. she has friends of her own. i'm not entirely sure if she lied when she said she was my friend, or if i just shattered the friendship. she wouldn't come find me. she wouldn't stop talking to her friends and look for me, she wouldn't even look for. me with her friends. i'm sorry i made i small plan relying on hope, and ultimately failed. i should just stop chasing after her. i won't be able to stop, no matter how hard i try. my heart had set itself on Jannessa. and it won't leave. course my heart. and i can hear the song she thinks of when she thinks of me...Believer by Imagine Dragons. i just want to talk to Jannessa. i'm being stupid, chasing a girl that probably lied when she said she was my friend. i just want to talk to her. and crying.
