Blurb: 3/5 It was fair enough but not good enough to catch attention. What I meant to say is that it is very short as well as it doesn't consist of any dialogue and scenes to make it appealing. It is simple and feels like a simple crush love story. However, you can make it catchy and good by adding a few scenes from the story here.
Cover: 2/5 It is simple and not eye-catching. What I meant to say is, it doesn't give off interesting and mysterious vibes. It doesn't do justice to this masterpiece you are writing. The color of font and background are mingling together and the flowery fr.a is not suiting. Cover is one of those basic factors which must be appealing and eye-catching to the readers and gain their attention. And I personally think, and I personally think you should change it.
Title: 4/5 It is so good and eye-catching. It is unique and suits the plot well. The name Circus of Longing is well chosen and really eye-catching. It made me wonder what it even means. I continued the story only because of this title.
First impression: 3/5 The first impression I had was not as good as I expected. Actually, the start felt like I was feeling everything behind me. This story doesn't tell us where the female lead came from and who her parents are. What was her life routine and background events. It simply starts from the present and merely a hint about the past of the girl is given. Telling us her character, her background might put some good impressions on the newcomers.
Reader's interaction: 7/10 Even though the story has less readers and has less votes. However, the readers who are present there are mingling and interacting with the story and characters well.
Plot: 9/10 This plot, I have never seen this type of poor ever. Surely, I read black magic books and plots, but something like this is rarely seen. You pulled the plot off fairly. It is still confusing at times but you are managing it well. It is well balanced between the present as well as The Joseon dynasty. I am still unable to understand the situation or the events happening there but I am sure you would do a good job handling it. The chapters are 10 only which are published which is a small amount to judge a book. Therefore, I am looking forward to the plot as it takes turns.
Twist: 9/10 It was totally unexpected that the girl will be pulled into a well and will be present in a circus. A circus of longings and memories and ungranted wishes. At this point the title works goof and shows its worth. What was more shocking was that the girl and the mainead had some connection with the past. Something happened in the past and the male lead is here for his unfinished job which concerns the female lead. What was even more shocking, which I read in the last few chapters, was the dialogue the male lead spoke. "I need to make her fall in love with me and then kill her" I am still not over this and excitingly waiting for the next update to know more.
Emotions: 7/10 Unfortunately, you are weak in this factor. Actually, the characters are still unknown and undescribed in the story, therefore we can't know what they are feeling. What their inner conflict is and what fears they have! You didn't show third emotions. Like fear, happiness, nervousness and shocked feelings. I think you should work on this factor. You can make yourself better by doing a monologue. Monologue means putting yourself in the character's shoes and thinking if you were in their place, what would you have done. Becoming an antagonist and calling out their acts and dialogues. Then become the protagonist and any other character, and practice their dialogue. In this way,you would come to know about the inner battles which your characters must have in a situation as well as their emotions and ways of handling them.
Grammar and vocabulary: 8/10 Your grammar is good but your vocabulary is weak. You need to make it better. Your words are simple and on some occasions, they are used again and again. You can make it better by practicing in the games which provide us with making new words and their meanings as well as you can take a notepad and start to write names of all the things around you. Once you are sure you have done all the things in the room,go out and explore more things. You can improve.
Character's development: 6/10 The characters are still unknown and undescribed in the story. They are confusing as hell. I didn't get what the purpose of the male lead and the female lead is. Their personality is not known and I can't say anything about their behavior. Only 10 chapters are published and they are short as well. So they don't give us a detailed picture of the characters.
Writing style: 7/10 It is fair enough but not to be considered best. All the lacking points explained above affect the writing style and its appearance. Your writing style is good but the way of explaining events is not. Some are so confusing to even digest in one go. Hope you can make it better.
Overall: 8/10
Total: 72/100
Oops! This image does not follow our content guidelines. To continue publishing, please remove it or upload a different image.
