Readers’ Interaction: 03/05 To be frank, I wouldn’t take this category into much consideration as your readers could also be silent viewers. From what I’ve seen, there were little to no comments or interactions. But, there were people giving high praise to your writing style; so yeps.
Cover: 00/10 So basically, all you did was upload a picture straight from google. It doesn’t have the book’s title, nor does it have the author’s name. Nothing at all which could attract more readers or tell them about your book, you know? For any book, it’s mandatory that it should contain the title & author’s pen name or name, at the least. The cover did not have any of that.
Description: 02/05 Okay, it did give me an idea on what the book would revolve round, but it lacks essence. You should’ve provided more details. Made it more entrancing. And, the ‘you’ you added in brackets was unnecessary. The blurb as of now only as 2 sentences- which doesn’t give enough insight on the book.
Title: 04/05 Yes, it suits the theme the book revolves around; but, it is common. I’ve come across plenty of book named so. You could’ve made it more unique- something which made your book stand out.
Plot: 07.5/10 Actually, the plot was good. Of course there may be similar plots & story lines; but it was still good. It was just its execution which needed more heed. But so far, I liked it. It wasn’t too cliché. I don’t know what else to say on this. So yes-
Grammar & Vocabulary: 14.5/20 First off, the lower caps. I know you mentioned it in the blurb; but I’m reviewing your book & there’s a special category for grammar & punctuations. So yeah- Lower intends, to be frank, looks really bad. Especially when you don’t use them for abbreviated form of words like ‘ID’ etc. It’s wrong both grammatically & presentation-wise. Talking about punctuations, when a line in direct speech is continued in the form of narration, make sure to use a coma before you ending double quotes. Taking this sentence as an example: ‘Ticket and ID please.’ the ticket collector demanded. The sentence could be conveyed in a better way if there was a comma after ‘ID’ (so as to indicate the pause) & you were to use a comma after ‘please’ since the line is further continued in narration. Moving on, I’d like to talk about the ellipsis you use. The universal value of an ellipsis is 3; nothing more, nothing less. When you use punctuation like question marks & exclamation points, do not leave space between the word & the punctuation. That’s wrong. Other than that, it was all good. I did not find any errors in the tenses you used; so good job! Moving onto the vocabulary. It could be improvised. But it’s mainly the sentence constructions & how you put words together. Many a times, you use extra words in a sentence. You know what I’m trying to say? But other than that, it was good. Not too complicated, but not too simple.
Plot twists & Attraction: 06/10 There’re only about 9-10 chapters as of now, so I don’t know much on the plot twists part. As for attraction . . . you could’ve done better. When I say attraction, I mean the overall outcome when you put everything together. The cover, the description, the title & everything else in the book. I have already mentioned the areas you need to improvise, so that’s that.
Emotions & Character Development: 06/10 About emotions. I feel that you don’t describe them enough. You describe scenes, but not the emotions the respective character goes through. Of course, I’m not saying that you are to add in emotional details of characters every now & then. But it would do good if you detailed some scenes of emotional relevance a bit more. The characters were all good. The way you gave each character its own spotlight is appreciable, so well done! Did not catch much of the development as there were only 10 chapters; but so far, so good.
Writing Style: 07.5/10 The way you describe things & go around your words is good. You have that style you use as your own to write. You just have to pay more attention to the punctuational errors. Exaggerating words by adding extra letters is not necessary. You can just use action tags instead of that. You could have describes some relevant, plot-building scenes a tad bit more, in my opinion. Like I mentioned above, mainly the emotions. Thing is, you describe the scenes; but not emotions. So that’s where the fault lies in descriptive writing. I also felt that you make many time skips. It’s not there there’s a problem with skipping time- but when you do it, keep it minimal. When you do it a lot, the flow gets ruined. Other than that, it was all good.
Overall opinion: 07/10 I think you did fairly well. The reason I deducted 3 scores is because of the lack in cover & such parts. Then the lower intends etc. Other than that, I liked it.
Total: 62.5/100
Review: I wanted to talk about the quotes you used in the beginning of chapters. The ones from the internet . . . you could’ve just copied it. Because, when you tried to change the wordings, the quotes became completely wrong. For instance, let’s take the quote you used in the second chapter of the book: ‘you have the kind of soul, the kind people stop to feel about.’ The actual quote goes like this: ‘You have a deep soul, the kind people stop to feel more about.’ Here, the one you used & the original one is completely different. What the quote means is that the person has the kind of soul that people stop to feel more about. When you changed the wordings, the quote meant that the person had the kind of soul that only kind people stopped to think about. So yes, you have to be more careful on that. Either copy quotes as it is (I wouldn’t recommend doing that since this is your book & you’re to use only your words) or be careful when change constructions. Please do not get discouraged or demotivated. I’m trying to help you here and no, I’m not one to beat around the bush or sugarcoat my words. It’s pretty obvious that you have the potential to become a good writer (though I swear to god, use the caps when needed man). I just think that you really need to change the cover. That’s first. Then of course, maybe edit the book a bit now before publishing the next chapters? It only has 10 chapters so you can finish it up. You can always improve yourself and your skills with practice, patience and time, hm? Don’t hesitate to hit me up if you have any queries ;)
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