Even though there weren’t a lot of comments, I could see that the readers were enjoying your work.
Cover: 4/10
I cannot say the cover was very attractive but I won’t ask you to change it either. But some editing is required, the subtitle and author’s name is in a really tiny font and I had to squint at it to read it. Do edit it.
Description: 2/5
It gave away too much. The description is supposed to make the reader curious but your whole plot was out there.
Title: 6/10
It is kinda common and not very intriguing. It could have definitely been better and unique.
Plot: 7/10
Cliche plot but since it was interesting to read, it was okay. Your story flows really well and you aren’t rushing into anything either. There aren’t any plot twists yet but that doesn’t make the book boring at all. Your story has quite a lot of humor and sass which I enjoyed. Good job with the plot!
Characters: 8/10
Character development was clear and evident, I don’t have any complaints there. I enjoyed your characters, especially Taehyung’s, the way he cares for the group and Jungkook really got to me. Also,you’re balancing Zoe’s and Jungkook’s relationship and Zoe’s and Taehyung’s relationship quite well. And more than the lead characters, I like the roles of Zoe’s best friend and brother. Their roles are contributing a lot to the story for sure. So, good job!
Grammar: 5/20
Firstly, I understand that english isn’t your first language but grammar does play an important role in a book. There were a lot of mistakes including spelling mistakes.It’s impossible to correct all your mistakes so here are some common mistakes you’ve made:
You’ve used the word ‘grewn’ more than a few times. There isn’t a word like that. It’s ‘grew’, ‘grow’, ‘grown’ and ‘growing’.
‘I walked downstairs to my parent, they were in the living room to seek their permission for night stay at jane.’
This sentence makes no sense at all because there are missing words and typos in it.
The correct sentence is: ‘I walked downstairs to my parents, they were in the living room. I wanted to seek their permission for the night stay at Jane’s.’
You’ve used [v’ll] in so many places. Please, no. You cannot use it while narration. Use we’ll or we will only while narration.
Usage of ‘their’. I could see that you’ve got ‘they’re’ and ‘their’ confused.
‘Their’ is a pronoun. For example, ‘Their car is red.’
Or ‘Their school is pretty cool.’
‘There’ is a contradiction of ‘they are’. For example, ‘They are so talented.’
Or ‘They are my favourites.’
I hope this is clear. Do proofread your chapters and make this change.
‘Finally after catching my breath i get up and pick up a bottle of water and my phone from my bag and walk towards tae and jimin to sit with them.’
There are so many mistakes in this sentence.
Firstly, avoid using ‘and’ so many times. Punctuate your sentences instead.
Secondly, you’ve not capitalized proper nouns like ‘tae’ or ‘jimin’ or even ‘i’. That is totally wrong and basic. This is not only in this sentence, it is throughout the book.
Here’s the correct sentence: ‘Finally after catching my breath I get up, pick up a bottle of water, my phone from my bag and walk towards Tae and Jimin to sit with them.’
You’ve used the word ‘conceret’ instead of ‘concert’ almost everywhere. Even in the title of chapter 5. Please change it.
It’s not ‘bircking’, it’s ‘bickering’.
Honestly, there’s so much more. But it’s not possible to correct everything. Do make these changes. Also, while writing next time use grammarly or the internet to cross check your sentences. It’ll make a big difference, I promise.
Writing style: 7/10
Everything was fine and I don’t really have a problem. You’ve done a good job in portraying emotions, I could almost feel everything you described.
Attraction:8/10
It was definitely intriguing and catchy, especially your sense of humour and I could see that readers could relate to the emotions and incidents in your book.
Opinion: 8/10
Except for the grammar part, I totally enjoyed reading your book. There were times when I found myself smiling at some parts and frustrated at other parts. Totally worth reading! But, there’s a lot of room for improvement, especially in the grammar criterion. I can see you’re trying so good luck. Also, please edit the cover and description. I hope your book gets the attention and love it deserves.
Total Marks: 58/100
اوووه! هذه الصورة لا تتبع إرشادات المحتوى الخاصة بنا. لمتابعة النشر، يرجى إزالتها أو تحميل صورة أخرى.
