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Title :: Blood Moon
Author :: @Nefelibatas_world
Reviewer :: @SURREALGGUK
Reader Interaction :: 2/5
You have quite a lot of reads, but the comments aren't showing their enjoyment. Maybe having too many ghost readers is a sign for you to do something about your book?
Cover :: 9/10
The cover's definitely aesthetically, and I understand its relevance to the story as well. Good job!
Title :: 3/5
In terms of uniqueness, there are tons of other books on Wattpad with the same title, so finding your book might be a challenge for readers, especially if you're not that well-known in the community. However, I do understand the relevance of the title to your story, so good job!
Description :: 4/10
This is the second time I'm reviewing a book written by you, and the second time I'm telling you that your description is way too vague. I did not understand anything about the plot at all, leaving me with no first impression of what the book is going to be like. Hence, how do you expect readers to be attracted to your book at all? Furthermore, the use of ellipses is inappropriate in this context, and should be replaced by periods or commas. I suggest you actually introduce the characters and story in your description instead of providing something so vague like what you've done.
Plot :: 4/10
For a book with a title like so, it's awfully cliche. I read the book with no first impression because I was given nothing to work with from the description, and after reading the first few chapters I could already tell that it was going to be cliche from the fact that Y/N was the Blood Moon King's mate. I read on to see how you'd develop your story, and the sudden time skips and multiple POVs only had me even more confused. What exactly are you going for in the story? You need to emphasise that, as well as develop the story even further. Setting the context is very important in keeping readers interested, but doing that for too long will bore readers too, so please keep that in mind.
Grammar/Vocab :: 8/20
The grammar was slightly better than I expected, but the mistakes made were once again very common among authors on Wattpad. It may be quite unnoticeable, but it's still there.
Dialogue tags should NEVER be capitalised, unless it's a name. You've been doing that all the time, and you should correct it before you end up losing unnecessary marks in awards.
If you want to emphasise something, like to indicate that a character is shouting, please do not use all caps. It throws people off, and typing in all caps is also typically only used when texting someone. If you really want to emphasise that someone is shouting, please only use at most TWO exclamation marks to achieve that effect.
Here are some of the many mistakes I found and how to correct them:
Chapter 01's ["That's mah, princess...HAPPY BIRTHDAY!"] is very poorly written. The English used in this sentence is informal English and typically only used when texting someone, and is hence highly inappropriate for writing. You inappropriately used a comma as well, and it disrupted the flow of the story. If you want to emphasise on a phrase, you should not type them in ALL CAPS like I just did. It throws people off and is usually only found when people are texting as well. Here's the correct sentence: ["That's my princess. Happy birthday!"]
Chapter 01's [Not too late, three maids entered her room once again but not alone.] doesn't make any sense at all. What's the point of using [Not too late]? It made the sentence grammatically incorrect, and made me really confused as well. I have no idea what you're trying to express here, but I believe the sentence would be better if the [Not too late] was removed.
Chapter 01's [Your tonight's outfit!] is wrong. It demonstrates the usage of informal English, and should be [Your outfit for tonight!] instead.
I'm not going to point out every mistake and how to correct them because there's simply way too many. You need to put in more effort in improving your grammar skills as this is an essential and basic skill to master as a writer. If you can't even improve yourself in this aspect, then I can safely say that you are not cut out to be a writer. I suggest you read more books outside of Wattpad. And when I say outside of Wattpad, I mean outside of Wattpad. Wattpad writers tend to have really bad grammar, so learning from them would be a big mistake. I suggest that you read more books to build your word bank as well as your word sense. When in doubt, please SEARCH IT UP. The Internet is a wonderful place for you to learn and grow, so please make full use of it.
Attraction :: 5/10
The story went on like a normal cliche werewolf-princess story would go, and I stopped expecting anything afterwards. Your story is promising, and I can sense the effort you put in in world-building. However, more should be done to attract readers.
Character Development :: 6/10
Your characters are fine, but more work needs to be put in to allow readers to immerse themselves in the story with the characters as the bridge. You need to reach out to your readers with your characters, and allow them to empathise with the characters, which will greatly improve the reading experience.
Writing Style :: 6/10
I like that you had descriptive scenes to allow the readers to better immerse themselves in the story. I had fun reading those descriptions, and I believe the readers would enjoy themselves as well. However, like I've said before, please refrain from using images to allow readers to visualise what you're writing, because then what's the point of you writing a book? You need to be able to use your words to win readers over and allow them to visualise the scenes you write clearly and vividly, and to do that, you don't need images. Please keep that in mind when you write.
Opinion :: 6/10
Your story is very promising, and the setting is really good as well. I can see how much effort you've put in with world-building, and I hope to see you put in more effort in perfecting your book rather than writing so many without 'finishing' your current works first. All in all, I hope my review helped you.
Total Score :: 53/100
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