✨𝐀𝐓𝐇𝐄𝐍𝐀 𝐑𝐄𝐕𝐈𝐄𝐖 𝐒...

By TheCharmsCommunity

17.1K 1.1K 1.8K

ᴀᴛʜᴇɴᴀ:: ~ ɢᴏᴅᴅᴇss ᴏғ ᴡɪsᴅᴏᴍ, ᴡᴀʀ ᴀɴᴅ ᴛʜᴇ ᴄʀᴀғᴛs ~ ᴛʜᴇ ᴡɪsᴇsᴛ, ᴍᴏsᴛ ᴄᴏᴜʀᴀɢᴇᴏᴜs, ᴀɴᴅ ᴄᴇʀᴛᴀɪɴʟʏ ᴛʜᴇ ᴍᴏsᴛ ʀᴇsᴏ... More

✨𝗪𝗘𝗟𝗖𝗢𝗠𝗘✨
✨𝐑𝐔𝐋𝐄𝐒 + 𝐏𝐀𝐘𝐌𝐄𝐍𝐓𝐒✨
✨𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐓𝐄𝐀𝐌✨
✨𝐅𝐨𝐫𝐦 𝐟𝐨𝐫𝐦𝐚𝐭✨
✨𝐁𝐀𝐓𝐂𝐇 𝟏✨[ᶜˡᵒˢᵉᵈ]
-Drop by coraline005 [Reviewer Elinah]
-Melody's Derail by Oddella [Reviewer Elinah]
-Idol's love by asthkook [Reviewer Laky]
-Life goes on by mochi1316 [Reviewer Riya]
-I need you by SL-BTSillion [Reviewer Seokie]
-Be with you by SL-BTSillion [Reviewer Laky]
-Bermuda Triangle by _sugarita [Reviewer Seokie]
-The friendzone by bigbangtanlover [Rev. Seokie]
-A rose with thorns by imcringey101 [Rev. Suzy]
-Darkness by yolamnicepaprika_7 [Rev. Elinah]
-My Little doctor by taekook_loverss [Rev. Riya]
-His idol by Liv__bee [Rev. Suzy]
-Idol companion by ameliaphoenix36 [Rev. Alice]
-Save me #army by marie0211 [Rev. Azaad]
-Love me back by yyyuehyyyie [Rev. Azaad]
-Life goes on 2 by mochi1316 [Rev. Riya]
-Mr. Right, my ass by worldwidecutieee_ [Rev. Rihana]
-Lie by _sugarita [Rev. Suzy]
-Born killers by preronasaha [Rev. Mini]
✨𝐁𝐀𝐓𝐂𝐇 2✨ [ᶜˡᵒˢᵉᵈ]
-The crown by Hogwartsjunior [Rev. Seokie]
-Say You love me by minsuga4evr [Rev. Nola]
-Cursed wish by Irtiza_yesmeen [Rev. Rihana]
-Devious Neighbor by Anushkieeee [Rev. Mini]
-One in a million by blazePR5 [Rev. Alice]
-You'll never know by weirdobtsarmy [Rev. Anika]
-It's Okay to dream by dark_red09 [Rev. Aland]
-Guns and Roses by blazePR5 [Rev. Mini]
-Mums by naeniabear [Rev. Rihana]
-Imposterism by auralite [Rev. Nola]
-Purple glow by zurafa978 [Rev. Aland]
-Don't make me fall for you by minhappy [Rev. Anika]
-Love Universe by purplelightarmy [Rev. Anika]
-suddenly Superheroes by lalalalala7fire [Rev. Mayesha]
-A favor by -angelkim- [Rev. Riya]
-His babyboy by kinga61313 [Rev. Seokie]
-Lullaby by Irtiza_yesmeen [Rev. Suzy]
-Angel Academy by antusama [Rev. Mimi]
-Astray by taekoo_kii [Rev. Nola]
-The truth untold by jiminiesponytail [Rev. Riya]
-So show me by jelly1799 [Rev. Suzy]
✨𝐁𝐀𝐓𝐂𝐇 3✨[ᶜˡᵒˢᵉᵈ]
-Head over heels by Minsuga4evr [Rev. Nola]
-Perfect In Imperfections by blazepr5 [Rev. Nola]
-Little sparkles by _arushiganla [Rev. Aland]
-The alluring abyss by ana_2504 [Rev. Seokie]
-The Blueties and the beast by everydaydreamingxxi [Rev. Nola]
-Hijabist by _kingjungkook_ [Rev. Nola]
-complex by hay_bangtan [Rev. Rihana]
-Psychopath by jin_forehead78 [Rev. Nola]
-Night Stalker by kinga61313 [Rev. Seokie]
-The royal patron by _arushiganla [Rev. Rihana]
-Faceless enemy by _kingjungkook_ [Rev. Anika]
-My mate by Jin_forehead78 [Rev. Aland]
-save me by ggukxe_glxtter [Rev. Rihana]
-kdrama partner by sugas_littlesis [Rev. Seokie]
-Criminal Stalker by i_am_ur_daddy [Rev. Aland]
-Empress Of Disgrace by gumnaam_ladki [Rev. Anika]
-Your eyes tell by 123hikibakas [Rev. Anika]
-I need you by taes_potathoe [Rev. Suzy]
-His Revenge by spinebreaker_2000 [Rev. Suzy]
-The AlphaAlpha by notinnocentjiks [Rev. Riya]
✨𝐁𝐀𝐓𝐂𝐇 4 [ᶜˡᵒˢᵉᵈ]✨
-Accursed by apoeticbee [Rev. Seokie]
-The gentle vampire by preronasaha [Rev. Seokie]
-Intrafraction by enigmatickpopper_ [Rev. Nola]
-Shower by lalalalala7fire [Rev. May]
-Never let go by Nefelibatas_world [Rev. Seokie]
-Last mission:break Jin by @_pxrple_jin92 [Rev. Anika]
-Did it for gucci by -yoonshooky [Rev. Anika]
-Blood Moon by nefelibatas_world [Rev. Nola]
-The girl with black hoodie by spinebreaker_2000 [Rev. Nola]
-Don't fall asleep by worldwidederp [Rev. Seokie]
-My first sight by jackjeonjungkook [Rev. Anika]
-Talk fast by lilchenette [Rev. May]
-Plexure by -yoonshooky [Rev. Suzy]
-Cry for me by Daph_0913 [Rev. Suzy]
-Faith against fate by naveena_bts [Rev. Suzy]
✨𝐁𝐀𝐓𝐂𝐇 5✨[ᶜˡᵒˢᵉᵈ]
Forbidden by kimjoonie890 [Rev. Seokie]
-Masked Swan by blaze-bangtan [Rev. Nola]
-Here and there by wrengi [Rev. May]
-My lovely hybrids by chesthakashyap [Rev. Rihana]
-BTS world by taetaekookiechips97 [Rev. Seokie]
-2 negatives makes positive by _mikromosmos_ [Rev. Rihana]
-Meant to be yours by taetae_kook01 [Rev. Rihana]
-The bartender by lilchenette [Rev. Nola]
-Mama by prignitia [Rev. Rihana]
-From his heart by -yoonshooky [Reviewer Suzy]
-Don't leave me by _mikromosmos_ [Rev. May]
-Time will Tell by fruitee347 [Rev. May]
-The Blueties And The Beasts by everydaydreamingxxi [Rev. Rihana]
-His Letters by -hopelxssromantic [Rev. Lals]
-Purple Rain by -Taesflower- [Rev. Suzy]
-Sciamachy by jjeonvrl [Rev. Suzy]
-Man at arms by marie0211 [Rev. Rihana]
-You and me by jkloveskooki [Rev. Anika]
-Who do I love by Thunder1333 [Rev. May]
✨𝐁𝐀𝐓𝐂𝐇 - 6✨[ᶜˡᵒˢᵉᵈ]
-what you want by imcringey101 [Rev. Suzy]
-Oh my baby by liv__bee [Rev. Suzy]
-Silencer by crystalcallistral [Rev May]
-Korean beauty by -sultryvixen- [Rev. May]
-5 centimeters per second by eulissah [Rev. Lals]
-The masked demon by miwaknight [Rev. Lals]
-Our time by yoon_gyu [Rev. Blaze]
-Dark paradise by idyllickook [Rev. Blaze]
-Sparkle by yyyuehyyyie [Rev. Anika]
-Fallen Queen by Disha_2007 [Rev. Anika]
✨𝐁𝐀𝐓𝐂𝐇 - 7✨[ᶜˡᵒˢᵉᵈ]
-Those Unsaid Words by wild_imaginator16 [Rev. Rabi]
-Circus Of Longing by daydreamingatnight19 [Rev. Rabi]
-Pinwheel by Yoon_Gyu [Rev. Anika]
The Cursed Mask by MoonJin_29 [Rev. Anika]
-The Awakening Of Death's Heir by caramxl-sex [Rev. Lals]
-Beautiful Thing Called Love by 123Lolly_tae [Rev. May]
-Genesis by marshaa1306 [Rev. May]
-My Anpanman by SeokJins_Yeonin_rh [Rev. Lals]
-Nyctophile by RihisNation7 [Rev. Blaze]
-Dead Poems by LenteInApril [Rev. Blaze]
-Masked swan by blaze-bangtan [Rev. Suzy]
-A love too far by blinky_army4ever [Rev. Suzy]
✨𝐁𝐀𝐓𝐂𝐇 8✨[ᶜˡᵒˢᵉᵈ]
-Lost and Found by -ttaeggukie- [Rev. Rabi]
-Strung together by -yoonshooky [Rev. Rabi]
-I'll show you by jelly1799 [Rev. Lals]
-Kiss, Marry, Kill by charli_foxx [Rev. Lals]
-My arrogant byuntae by 123lolly_tae [Rev. Anika]
-Life and It's consequences by yolamnicepaprika7 [Rev. Blaze]
-True beauty #2 by pepper_minth [Rev. Suzy]
-Idol by taeslilkookie [Rev. Suzy]
-The art of loving you by -sultryVixen- [Rev. Anika]
-The era of swords by axctuallyangel [Rev. Blaze]
✨𝐁𝐀𝐓𝐂𝐇 9 [ᶜˡᵒˢᵉᵈ]✨
-Amorous by hotchocochipcookie [Rev. Rabi]
-Whispers in Dark by crqmelcndq_ [Rev. Rabi]
-Petrichor by kimsuga86 [Rev. Lals]
-Unidentified Darkness by varmyghost [Rev. Anika]
-Those Unsaid Words by wild_imaginator16 [Rev. Suzy]
-Kingdom of the seven by justin_seagull_31 [Rev. Suzy]
-Travel in time by amelie1318 [Rev. Blaze]
-Mystified tale by sujinataekie [Rev. Blaze]
-Slave by staend [Rev. Lals]
-Vigilante by epochbts [Rev. Anika]
-Love, from the graveyard by kimsuga86 [Rev. May]
-Twisted Fates by aadritasrivastava [Reviewer May]
𝐁𝐀𝐓𝐂𝐇 10 [ᶜˡᵒˢᵉᵈ]
-My Darkening Ember by evaalisa22 [Rev. Rabi]
-Kaleidoscope Eyes by renadeen [Rev. Rabi]
-Bad Girl's Good Boy by gumnaam_ladki [Rev. Anika]
-Fading Sorrow by chimmykook2006 [Rev. Anika]
-Inception of Doom by @kattyfish03 [Rev. Lals]
-let's run away by jinielove17 [Rev. Lals]
-Titanium by my_mochi_molala [Rev. Blaze]
-the man of your dream by milktaetangerine [Rev. Suzy]
-Stellify by hotchocochipcookie [Rev. Suzy]
𝐁𝐀𝐓𝐂𝐇 11 [ᶜˡᵒˢᵉᵈ]
-13th October by taetae_army_luv [Rev. Rabi]
-My reflection by meherjin [Rev. Rabi]
-Hotel redstone by taetaeficks [Rev. Rabi]
-21 days by ririii_v [Rev. Rabi]
-Rejection by taes_smirk [Rev. Anika]
-Blueties and the beasts by everydaydreamingxxi [Rev. Anika]
-Phoenix by meherjin [Rev. May]
-The Angel's Diary by Love_jinnia_ [Rev. May]
-Toxic love by yoiamnicepaprika_7 [Rev. Suzy]
-Leeward by empiresofwater [Rev. Suzy]
𝐁𝐀𝐓𝐂𝐇 12 [ᶜˡᵒˢᵉᵈ]
-PJM Mafia ff by yashasviJ [Rev. Rabi]
-Stand by you by nabila_tasnim [Rev. Rabi]
-Heal my heart by @renadeen [Rev. Bun]
-Deep into you by kimsuga86 [Rev. Anika]
-Destination reached by imacrazyangel13 [Rev. Anika]
-hey eomma, hey appa by songyeeun2500 [Rev. Bun]
-The possessive knight by mochi_archer [Rev. Lals]
-13th October taetae_army_luv [Rev. Lals]
-Prank call by taes_smirk [Rev. Suzy]
-Revelation by marie0211 [Reviewer Blaze]
𝐁𝐀𝐓𝐂𝐇 13 [ᶜˡᵒˢᵉᵈ]
-Aravena by sabrinaettey [Rev. Anika]
-The Sky Bandits by sanch250 [Rev. Anika]
-Retrouvaille by itsbangtanbeaches [Rev. Lals]
-Daughter of the Gods by prodigiousflames [Rev. Bun]
-Kiss to marriage by and_sprite023 [Rev. Bun]
-The Dawn of Sommers by miss1extinct [Rev. Lals]
-Meeting the prince in the rain by dreamcatcher_flics [Rev. Suzy]
-Suryaputri Akriti by kishori_writes [Rev. Blaze]
-The lands of Ranuula by sanch250 [Rev. May]
-The lost portrait by penpaperandbooks [Rev. Anika]
-Is humanity the Real Sanity? by blackpumpkin [Reviewer Lals]
-Xorad by my_mochi_molala [Rev. Blaze]

-A new start by alocer_ [Rev. Blaze]

30 1 1
By TheCharmsCommunity

Book Name: A new start

Author:  Alocer_

Reviewer: blaze

Cover: 01/05

The cover doesn't seem appealing at all. It's just the font placed on the raw one. When it's clearly mentioned "new start", please make sure to use a pic similar to that. You can also check out the graphic shop of our community if you want beautiful designs. The font could be preferably changed to cinzel or something similar since the one which is present does no justice. 

Title: 04/05

The title it apt to the story, giving a direct insight into what the plot is about. Therefore, it's a suitable title but since this title is overused, I wood suggest you to go for an alternative one. 

Synopsis: 02/10

The sypnosis is really long, with huge paragraphs and I immediately lost my interest to read it. A blurb should have only two to three paragraphs with two or three sentences as dialogues to perk up the interest of the readers. The blurb really gave away too much. It was rather an excerpt rather than a blurb. 

Execution: 05/10

The execution of the plot was a bit poor. You've written the entire story with huge paragraphs and sometimes, it's become less coherent. What I mean is that, sometimes, it doesn't make sense at all. The dialogues seem to be a bit all over the place. The balance between them was missing and I wood suggest you to edit all your chapters, make the dialogues more coherent and realistic, and then continue writing. 

Plot: 9/20

The plot, at the beginning, seemed like any typical fanfic. I don't understand why you've portrayed the female protagonist to be a weak one in the first few chapters. That's a major drawback in your story. When you're writing a plot, make sure that it's consistent. I noticed a lot of inconsistency and prominent plot holes in the story. 

Writing Style: 10/20

The writing style seems to have be too direct, and reduces the interest of the readers. When you're writing, make sure to use metaphorical phrases and many more literary devices to make sure that it's more appealing. Also, when you're writing, don't make the paragraphs too big or too small since it's really unbalanced and messed up to look at. On a side note, it's highly unprofessional. 

Grammar & Vocabulary: 09/20

Your grammar needs to be looked into. You've made tons of grammatical errors and the tense switch often you had made without your knowledge messes up the entire story. On the other hand, the usage of upper key words, as in usage of capitalising words and adding too many exclamations at the end seems to be really unprofessional and redundant. Kindly refrain from doing so. 

The usage of dialogue tags should be looked into as it's missing at some intervals while its present at some. Your vocabulary is average, and should be made more vast go attract a larger audience. 

Characters & Development: 05/10

The character development, was not much prominent, rather, we could say that the feelings were the ones which were developed. With your characters, you didn't look as a whole but rather as a mentality of the character. Please make sure to define the entire character well before writing any chapter. 

Total: 45/100

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