SNL 2020

Post Valentines

Qing: (sighing defeatedly) I really wonder why I am still in a relationship with you.

Me: (scandalized) It's because you love me! You moronic jerk!

Why is he suddenly wondering why he is in a relationship with me?

(Yes, Dayu ah...why is Baba wondering about that?)

I don't know. That's why I asked him about that and Qing scowled at me.

Qing: (displeased) You really have the nerve to ask me that? I don't know. Maybe it's because I cannot fathom why I am staying in a relationship with someone who doesn't listen to me.

Me: I listen to you.

Qing: (glowering in anger) You didn't listen to me last night when I told you to stop eating too much seafood fried rice. There were meat crabs on them, plus squids. But did you listen to me?

I opened my mouth to answer but Qing was not done being angry at me.

Qing: No! You didn't listen. Instead, you had three servings of rice and two skewers of grilled shrimp and seabass. You ate too much sea creatures again and now look!

Qing raised my arm in the air so it will level on my face.

Qing: You have red blotches again and scratching them raw. Not to mention that you had several meetings with the toilet already when it's not noon yet. You have an allergic reaction and loose bowel movement because you ate too much last night. Bravo for you, Feng Jian Yu! Now tell me, how will I not get angry?!

Me: (sniffing in shame) They taste good.

(Dayu ah!)

They really taste good! I'm not kidding. Mama, Qing's mother that is, discovered a new chef and she paid for that chef to prepare our Valentine's dinner with Qing's parents last night. The food was sublime. They taste amazing. I was so happy last night. Me and Baba. We ate well, Baba and me. Mama was happy to see me eating well. Qing was the only one who tried to kill my joy.

Qing: (irritated) It's because I know this will happen. That too much seafood will make you itch. I didn't anticipate the several trips on the bathroom but that is annoying me too.

Me: You should have warned me about the itching.

Qing: I warned you not to eat too much seafood.

Me: Yeah, you just said not to eat too much seafood but you didn't add why I should not eat too much seafood. If you just make it more specific...

I stopped talking when I saw the storm growing darker in Qing's eyes. I look down to show him that I am regretting all my decisions last night.

Me: (sighing dejectedly) I'm sorry. Sorry for not listening to you. Sorry for getting blotches and lbm. Sorry for worrying you.

I lift my head up so I can see Qing's reaction to my apology. My fiancé is giving me a pained look. Like I am the reason for all of his sufferings. Which could be the whole point.

Qing: (long suffering sigh) Maybe it's good that our engagement is still a secret. Maybe the heavens designed it that way to give me a chance to save myself...

He stopped spewing ridiculous things like saving himself from being engaged to me when I tackled him and tried my hardest to pinch any part of him I can pinch. Qing caught my wrists and a wrestling match commenced. I tried pinning him under me but Qing just effortlessly kept me at bay.

I'm not a happy squirrel.

Me: (scowling and growling) I will give you a chance to say that you are just joking when you said you are thinking of saving yourself from marrying me. And you better be joking because you won't like what I will do if you are being serious.