SNL 2020

Ring Robber

Qing took my engagement ring! He took it! He robbed me! He is a ring robber!

Qing: (highly insulted) Robber? Stop saying that!

Me: No! You ring robber! You took my ring!

Qing: No, I did not! Technically, you gave me to me.

Me: To try it on! Not to keep it!

Qing: (sighing) It's not my fault that your engagement ring is now stuck on my finger.

Qing has been trying to take my engagement ring off his left fourth finger for a good half hour before we started arguing as I accuse him of robbery. I was pestering him again about wearing an engagement ring like me and I asked him to try my ring on to see if he really doesn't like the feel of wearing an engagement ring.

But the thief now won't let me have my ring back! He is a robber! I'm telling you all...

(Jeez you...)

And the worst part, y'all just witnessed it, Qing won't even take the blame for this fiasco!

Me: Then whose fault is it? The ring?! Are you blaming my sweet, innocent and beautiful ring?!

Qing: (glowering) Stop shouting at me, Feng Jian Yu.

Me: Give me back my ring first! You robber!

Qing had enough of me shouting. He grabbed me, hauled me into our bed and proceeded to keep me quiet and busy for an hour. I'll admit, after cumming twice, I sorta calm down.

(Really you...)

But I am still distressed. My ring is still not on my finger.

Qing: (cuddling me) It's grating on my nerve too! I bought this ring to always grace your finger, not mine.

Me: (sounding teary) Give me my ring back.

Qing: (kissing my forehead) Stop your OCD and your desire to have everything in their right place. I will sort this out and you will have your ring back again.

Me: I will help.

Qing: (wincing) Maybe sit this one down, Love.
You're too emotional attached on the subject in interest.

Me: (glaring at him) No! That's my ring. It won't leave my sight.

Qing: (groaning) You will make this...difficult, right?

Oh...I will make sure he will pay for robbing my ring from me.

(But Baba didn't rob it from you...)

Stop defending him! Are y'all his lawyers? Just how much is Wang Qing paying you all to always take his side anyways?! Make no mistake, I'm the victim here. Me and my ring!

Sympathize with me!

(You are so needy sometimes)

I hate y'all.

Anyways, Qing and I started thinking of ways to get the ring off his finger. I stuck by his side like I threatened him that I will do. I won't let my ring off my sight. That's my ring! My precious!

(Goodness)

Me: Lets rub soap on it to loosen it up.

Qing: Yeah, that's what I was thinking too.

So we got to the bathroom and I watched as Qing wash his hand and rub soap on my ring. I wince everytime he's vigorously rubbing the soap on my ring.

Me: Careful! Careful! You might scratch it.

Qing: That won't happen.

Me: It will. And the watermarks...oh...