SNL 2020

Flaws

April 2020 is giving March 2020 a run for its money. March was a total bore and clusterfuck for many. April is like a continuation of March that it's also a bore and half clusterfuck. By now May is not making any promises that things will improve soon.

So...how are y'all?

Still alive? Good, good, it's always good to be alive. I mean...living could be painful and hard but dying could also be painful and hard so I'd say choose living.

Still working? Great! It's always good to earn money. I mean...I wish we'd all go back to the barter system where money is not a piece of paper with faces of dead people in them. Hey! I have herbs, I'll trade it for some pork! Good barter, right?

Qing is doing the side comment thing so I will write it here.

Qing: You'll trade herbs for pork? Isn't it unfair for the other person. It's hard to raise pig. You just water those herbs. The sun was the coparent.

Me: What do you know about growing herbs?

Qing: Nothing.

Me: Then shut up about it. Growing herbs in pots is also hard work. And besides, herbs with pork is the best. Will you just eat pork like that? Plain without herbs and spices? Talk about boring. I'd say, take my herbs and lets eat well seasoned food...huh?

Qing: (sighing) Fine. Barter with the herbs.

Me: Thank you. Don't agitate me or I might cook with oregano again.

Qing: Grave threat. I could sue you for that.

Me: Sue me! Who is stopping you? I will take my superior bartering skill in prison.

Qing: Herbs won't be the commodity there. It will be your...

Me: Singing skill! I will sing for the other prisoners there!

Qing: (smirking) Do you actually believe that's all they will ask from you?

Me: Fine! They will take my ass! But they have to fight over it. I won't be just anyone's bitch. I have a premium ass.

Qing: (nodding) That you do.

Me: (sighing) I won't last in a prison. I should always be a law abiding citizen. Follow the law and pay my taxes on time.

Qing: We almost failed to complete your tax returns this year.

Me: Don't remind me! That was a stressful moment for me.

I dreamt about the revenue department knocking on our condo to arrest me for not paying my tax on time.

Anyhow, where are we again? Oh yeah...April, it's coming to a close! Hurray or meh...whatever. We are almost done with the first month of the second quarter this year.

Now...what else should we talk about? Hmmm...

Qing: What about our sleeping patterns?

Me: What about it?

Qing: I have been losing sleep, Dayu ah.

Me: (instantly concern) Why? Are you ill?

Qing: No. You are.

Me: (gasping) (affronted) How dare you...say that part out loud?! Hey! I know my panic attack episode was not pretty...

Qing: (surprised) I'm not talking about that. For fuck's sake, Dayu...

Me: (mellowing down) Oh...that is not the problem? Then what is the problem?

Qing: (wincing) Your snores. They are getting louder.