Bad Desire: New Beginnings - Fast Forward

Chapter 66

"If I tell you this, you have to promise you'll reconsider joining." Jay reasoned, watching Jess with dark eyes yet still no sign of that small hint of the caring Jay being in there.

"Okay." Jess shrugged her shoulders, knowing if she didn't agree she would never get it out of him and she was swaying towards desperation at this point.

"Buddy is alive." Jay came straight out and said it, causing Jess to freeze in utter shock at what he had just said.

"What?!" She sat back in her seat, definitely not expecting those words to leave his lips.

"I'm not repeating myself." He bit back in response, yet the bitter comment went unmissed by Jess due to her confused state.

"I thought you and Matt killed him a long time ago?"

As Jay began playing with his phone which had been placed on the table before him, Jess could tell this was something that was clearly bothering him. He was frustrated that the man who had caused them all so much pain was still alive and standing after they had worked so hard to get rid of him.

"Yeah well it failed and the reason it failed was because none of us were in the right fucking mind set when we tried to kill him." Jay went onto explain and by this point Jess decided to not say a word and just listen. She had finally got him talking and was not prepared to ruin that by throwing more questions at him.

"We were so caught up in life here; whether it be for love or families, that it fucked everything up. That's why we're back... to give those who messed with our minds a little payback before we focus on getting rid of Buddy."

"Payback?!" Jess couldn't hold back from interrupting anymore as she was absolutely disgusted in what he was doing. "You want to harm innocent people who used to be a big part of your lives just because they 'fucked with your minds'?"

Jess couldn't quite believe what Jay was saying and she couldn't understand what was going through his mind to think this was okay.

Just because they had failed to kill Buddy, they had instantly decided to place the blame on those in Brighton they used to care about. Those they had been closed to as friends, as lovers or as family members were now having the blame placed on them for ruining their mind set and therefore leading to a failed attempt at getting rid of Buddy.

Jess couldn't see how any of it made sense and knew that it was just an excuse due to their aggravation and she also couldn't believe Jay was going to let this happen.

They were all back here to stir up a little trouble and make those in Brighton regret ever getting close to them, just so they could feel good about their mistake once again.

"We're not going to harm anyone." Jay carelessly chuckled. "Just have a bit of fun. Put a bit of fear back into everyone and not let them think they can so easily get close. People used to fear gangs, Jess. But now it's not the same and it's about time things went back to how they used to be."

Running her hands through her hair, Jess was trying so hard not to raise her voice and draw attention to them but her frustration with Jay was increasing. What made perfect sense to them was absolutely insane to her and she wished she could knock some sense back into him.

"What you're doing is so wrong. Is this why Matt is mad at you?"

"No." Jay began shaking his head and when Jess realised he wasn't going to give an explanation like she was expecting, she further questioned him.

"Why are you arguing then?"

"Because to get payback at Buddy and actually get rid of him this time, I'm trying to put a bigger and stronger gang together." Jay began to explain. "His brother Michael wants in on it and Matt doesn't like that I'm considering the idea... so he's threatening to leave the gang."

Jay's words caused Jess' mouth to fall open in complete shock that Jay could be so stupid. She didn't feel like she was talking to the Jay who used to have everything under control and it instead felt like this was a whole new person who was no longer thinking rationally.

"Are you fucking stupid? Michael was after you all for so long!"

"Yeah that was until he found out what Buddy did to his parents. Now he knows, he wants pay back, so we could do with his help."

There was nothing else Jess could say as she sat opposite a man she used to love dearly but who was now fading away with the toxic mind the gang life had filled him with.

She hated seeing him this way and hated watching someone who used to have such a big heart, that no one saw, was about to screw things up for not only himself but also many people around him.

*

:)