"How are you feeling?" Jess asked Louise as she took a seat down beside her on the sofa.
It was strange watching Louise's previous active state, change so dramatically as she had to delicately lower herself down. She felt and looked much weaker now and although each day seemed to bring more hope, she had her down days too.
"I'm doing good now." She smiled with a reassuring tone to her voice. "Sometimes I want to do nothing but sleep but all in all I feel much better than before." She chuckled.
"That's good." Jess gave her hand a squeeze. She wanted nothing more than for Louise to recover this as did everyone else. She was many people's rock and the thought of being without her just didn't seem possible.
She was currently in the maintenance part of her treatment and it was planned to continue for roughly two years. She was on constant watch by her doctors but they were always reassuring her that it was just for her own benefit and out of caution.
Life at home for Louise and the Lawrence's in general had been different, which was expected. Louise could do a lot less and need much more rest than before. Therefore, her days helping Dan out with work had been reduced alongside her ability to help Jess and Jack with the kids.
It was one of the things that got her down the most and she would occasionally have to let them down last minute. Sometimes she could wake up feeling at her best and other days she would wake up needing to just remain in bed. Therefore, plans with the kids could never be promised until the day it was supposed to go ahead anymore.
"Now what about you... Jack told me about that little boy Kian." Louise spoke softly, clearly trying to approach the situation carefully.
"Oh..." Jess fell strangely shy as she hadn't realised Jack had said anything. "I'm okay... it's all just a bit strange at the moment."
Nodding her head, Louise took a sip of her water before turning back to Jess.
"I'm sure strange is an understatement. You need to remember that it's okay to feel whatever you're feeling, this is a huge thing. But you and Jack also need to trust each other, don't let this tear you apart."
It was clear that Louise had picked up on the unease running between them; she wasn't stupid. It wasn't that they were still arguing, they just avoided the topic that was obviously looming between them and it definitely wasn't helping anything.
"I know, you're right." Jess agreed, hearing Louise say it out loud made her realise how stupid they were being.
They needed to support one another, no matter how difficult it all was and they couldn't do that if they avoided talking about it. No matter how messed up it all was, they were in this together, they were still a team.
"I heard Jack is going to see him tomorrow morning. How do you feel about that?"
Jess didn't say anything for a moment as she didn't know how she felt. It was all still a bubble of confusion in her head and she wasn't sure when things would begin to become clear.
"I want him to go, it's just weird and I'm nervous for him. I know he's worried and I can't be there to help."
"Do you want to be there?"
Louise's question held Jess silent for a moment as she was unsure how to answer that question. Did she want to be there? She didn't know. Part of her would say yes, for Jack's sake but at the same time, she didn't want to. It would not only be too much for Kian to handle, she didn't know how she would handle it either.
"I don't really know." She answered honestly and it looked like it was the answer Louise had been expecting.
"Just remember that he won't be judging you." Louise began in regards to Kian. "If he knows, he won't care that you're his mum's sister and his dad is your husband. Those things are only difficulties that you and Jack have to face. That little boy will just be grateful to be given a family and more people to love him."
Louise was watching Jess with such a warming smile on her face as she spoke, sending such comfort through her.
"He will love you Jess, how can he not? You're an incredible mother to your own children and I know you'll be amazing to him to. You will be a positive addition to his life; don't let anything make you think otherwise."
In that moment, Jess practically threw herself at Louise and embraced her in the biggest hug. She always had such a beautiful way of putting things to take away any fear or hurt surrounding a situation and replacing it with something more positive.
Yes, none of this was ideal and it was never going to be perfect but that didn't mean they couldn't make the best of it. Jess loved children and loved being that important role model in their lives so she would be able to play that part in Kian's life too.
It would take time but with the support of Jack, they would get there and they could change this messed up situation into something much more rewarding.
...
A few hours later, after Jess and Louise had shared an intense opening up session over plenty of tea, Jack and Dan arrived back home from the park with the kids. They were all now gathered in the garden, making the most of the hot weather they were getting, while the kids continued to let off even more energy that they still had buzzing through them.
"Do you plan on going to the new garage anytime soon?" Louise asked the question both men in front of her had been avoiding.
The last time they were in Cambridge at the new garage, Jack's dad received a call from the hospital about Louise's state. Therefore, due to her illness, they hadn't been there since and it was something that Louise wasn't so happy about.
She hated the fact that she was the reason they had put it on hold. She didn't want to be the reason why they were not continuing to get the place up and running.
"I haven't really thought about it." Jack answered honestly and got a sad look from his mum.
"Jack..."
"It's just not a priority right now, Louise." Dan spoke up for him. "We'll do it eventually, don't worry."
"You can't put it on hold because of me. I'm fine." She insisted. "I don't need someone with me twenty four seven."
Jack needed his dad with him to get the garage up and running and that wasn't easy when Dan needed to be home. They would have you be there for longer than a day at a time, so it would be including staying over. They really didn't have the time for that right now.
"Mum, I promise we will get back to it. Just not right now." Jack reached out and squeezed her hand, noticing the worry lines forming on her face. "Things at the garage are busy and I can't leave that to the guys right now."
Jack was trying to convince Louise that she wasn't the reason, that it was actually due to the garage. However, she knew that was a lie.
"If you boys don't go and do it, Jess and I will do it ourselves!" Louise turned and winked at Jess, causing her to laugh. "We could handle it couldn't we?"
"Of course! We'd do a much better job." She agreed.
"Never going to happen." Jack laughed not being able to think of anything worse.
Jess was great with interior design and had done an amazing job when redesigning his office at the garage in Brighton however, the main part of the garage was not her speciality.
"But seriously, it's fine to wait. It's not a rush."
"Why don't you ask some of the guys to help? If your dad is so insistent on staying here..." Louise looked to Dan with a teasing expression, one that made Jess and Jack smile due to the obvious love they still showed one another. "...then get the guys to help instead. I'm sure they'd love the extra responsibility."
"That's actually a good idea." Dan nudged Jack as he was clearly thinking long and hard about her comment. That way you can come home more; get them to stay up there for as long as you need."
Running his hand over his face while he thought about it, Jack's gaze found Jess' as he tried to figure out what she was thinking. He wanted to make sure whatever they did, she would be okay with and in full agreement.
"We're not trying to tell you what to do." Louise then spoke up again, their parental ways looming through without realising. "I just don't want you stalling because of me. You have a baby due in just three months too, you won't want to be staying away once it's born."
Louise had a point. If he kept waiting and waiting to sort the garage out, he would never get it done. Their baby was due in a matter of months and he had promised himself and Jess that he would take a few weeks off work when it was born and then cut down his hours after that. Due to their family size increasing, he couldn't expect Jess to be on her own taking care of everyone, she needed him.
Therefore, taking on the new garage when the baby was born wasn't possible. He needed to get it finished before.
"Do you think it's a good idea?" Jack finally spoke up, turning to Jess.
"Yeah, definitely. I'd rather you do it before she's born." She nodded, relieved at the idea of him not leaving her alone once their fifth child came into the world.
"I'll speak to the guys then." He responded, sounding confident in the idea. "I'll see who's up for it."
Their original plans of Jack and Dan doing it together may not be able to go ahead, but his mum was right in that he couldn't continue to stall it. He had to think more practically and this seemed to be the best way to ensure it all got finished.
...
Later that day Jack had headed for the garage to meet the guys for a conversation regarding the new idea. He knew this was the best way of going about things, as much as it did meaning leaving not only his family but his mum for a little bit.
"So I was thinking Aaron, Zaiden and Alex, you guys could come with me?" Jack suggested after spending the car journey trying to decide who was best to take with him.
He needed to even things out a little but he also wanted as many of his most trusted with him. Getting the new garage up and running needed to be a quick process so he had to be particular about who he chose.
"And then Corey, how do you fancy taking charge around here for a bit?"
Jack knew the reaction he was going to get from Corey as those words left his mouth. Obviously, Dan would be around to keep check of everything but the idea of playing manager for a couple of weeks sent an insane amount of excitement through him.
"I'm not going to say no!" He laughed, earning a mirrored reaction from Jack. Of course he wasn't going to turn it down.
"And Harris, I understand if you need to stay here with Soph because of the whole new pregnancy thing and-" Jack began to say before Aaron cut him off.
"Nah, it's cool. I love her but she's driving me insane." He chuckled, in regards to her uncontrollable hormones. "I could do with a few weeks away."
Sophie was a lot to handle on an average day, add a pregnancy in the mix and it was a whole new challenge.
"Straight to the point, no holding back." Jack laughed, knowing that Sophie had admitted herself that the whole pregnancy thing could occasionally give her a complete personality switch. It was like that time of the month but much worse.
"What about you though? Is Jess cool with it?"
"She said she is." Jack nodded. "I mean I will probably come back on the weekends because she's going to need the help."
Jack had set out a plan so that the first week was used for revamping the garage to how he wanted it. Then the second week was to be used for the opening. He had already put adverts out for new staff and would be interviewing while he was up there however, the first week he wanted some of the guys from Brighton to show them how things were done.
He knew no time would be a great time for him to leave Jess and the kids but he needed to get this done now. Like his mum said, it needed to be before the baby was born and right now he was just stalling.
"So it's going to be a lad's holiday in Cambridge!" Alex clapped his hands with excitement earning an approving grin from Zaiden.
Alex was the only one out of the four who didn't have a partner and children and therefore, any trip away he classed as a holiday. While Jack, Aaron and Zaiden would be having nightly phone calls with their other half and kids, Alex would be searching his phone for the best nightclubs in the city.
"As long as you'll be working, I don't care what you call it." Jack laughed. "We'll leave tomorrow evening, alright?"
Everyone was in immediate agreement as they felt a huge sense of excitement over this trip. They felt proud to help Jack finally get the place up and running and especially knowing they would be putting their own input into it all.
**
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