January 14, 2014
It was the first day of classes. I was sitting with my "so-called band". We have a new student in class. She moved here to Australia from another continetn. She sat at the far end chair in the corner of the classroom. Almost half of the claa stood up to talk to her. We shared glances and quikly looked away. I hope I'll get the chance to get to know her.
They were all teasing her because she's asian. No, they were not teasing her, they were bullying her. But she doesn't care. She'll just smile at them and will just go back from readin her book.
I can't believe I just talked to her for the longest time today. I saw her at the parc and I sat beside her. I asker her how she feels about the bullies and stuff and she just said, "I don't care about them. They're mean, but I don't care." We walked back home and only to find out our houses were right across eadh other. I like her.
Valentine's day. I slipped a note in her locker. I didn't put my name, of course. I waited for her. She opened it and she blushed. I scored today. I told her I like her, I hope she likes me back.
We pretty much walk home everyday since I found her at the parc. She was telling me that I was her only friend. She's alone on everytime, except when going to school and going back home, she's always with me. She told me she doesn't really feel lonely at all and that she's used to it. So I told her she could sit with us. I'm starting to fall for her. I wonder if she knew.
They actually like her. Luke said she was sassy. Calum said he thought she was shy but she's really cheerfull and all. That's it, I fell in love with her.
She acting really weird. She's been less cheerfull. I wonder if she's okay. She's fine she said. But there's something in her eyes that's making me want to ask her what's wrong.
It's her birthday. Me and the band prepared something for her. I invited her to Ashton's place. She was out first audience. She was happy to see us play for her. But there's something behind her smile that made me think that she's not okay. I gave her a Sticht onesie since she really liked the character. I'm still waiting for the day that I'll get the chance to tell her.
She started going to schoolwearing hoodies even though it's hot and her eyes always look like she cried. She's not very cheerfull like before. She spends more time alone than before. Everytime I approach her, she will just tell me she's fine even though I never even said a thing. I hope she's okay.
They were still bullying her up to this date, but she didn't tell them her "I don't care", she ran away this time. She went to the girls' comfort room and hid in the cubicle. I tried to follow her inside but it's the girl's cr. She never let them get to her. I wonder what happened. I hope she's fine.
I came by to her house to vister her. Her mum lead me to her room, she's still asleep. Her hoodie's sleeve are pushed up. What I saw really made me feel quilty even though I never did anything. Her deep cuts were still red. She's been harming herself. I can't believe I've been so blind. I tried to talk to her but just cried and criend. She said she'll try to be strong again. She's deinitly not okay.
They still bully her but I'm stopping them this time. I hope that'll help her. She never really changed. Still sad, lonely girl. She still wears hoodie to school. I think she still do it though. I'm trying so hard to make her feel better. She's still not cheerfulll one I came to know tho.
I asker her to prom and she said yes. She smiled for a moment, I hope that made her happy. She's still not the cheerfull one I came to know tho.
She didn't go to school today. I hope she's fine. I came to vister her house. Her parents aren't home. The front door is open. She wasn't in her room. I searched the whole house for her. I found her in the bathtub with the water so red from her bleed caused by the deep cuts. I called for an ambulance. The doctor said she's dead an arrival. I cried and cried. She reached her edge. She jumped off of it for the last time and said "goodbye angel." I found a letter on the floor. I cried while I was readin it. I never even get the chance to tell her I love her
It was nice meeting you and your bandmates. I'm sorry that it have to be this way. I'm sorry I never told you about my cuts. I just don't want to be a burden. You've been a really good friend to me even though they all shut me down. You made me feel like I was worth it even for a short time. Thank you for all the happy memories you shared with me. I'm sorry I can't go to the prom with you. I'm really sorry. Stay happy Michael. Always be yourself. I will always be at your side. I would like to see your band grow big. But I guess I'll be watching you guys secretly then. Thank you Michael. I hope you're the one to find this letter. Tell mum and dad I'm sorry.
Oh and one more thing..
I fell in love the moment I laid my eyes on you. I love you Micael Clifford."