Perspective

Blame

~Host Sans

As we searched, we, well, more like Geno, stumbled upon Ink. He was in a bad condition. Geno used that stuff he kept with him to heal Ink up a bit, he still wouldn't say a thing. He eventually stuttered something about Fresh being stronger than before, just hearing his name made me shiver.

Ink and Geno talked, I didn't interfere until they were done and they parted again. I asked Geno what this was all about, he finally told me.

It was "Dust" who got possessed he said, I guess Dust was the nickname of that other Sans that was basically Nightmare's slave. He kept talking, but I stopped listening, this broke me.

Not in an insane, gone crazy way, I just felt extremely bad. I told him that I was the only one that should be hurt, heck, even deserved to be hurt after all of this trouble, but he disagreed. He wanted to find a way for Fresh not to hurt anyone at all.

I didn't tell him, but riddle me this, if Geno was planning on using souls that he used for experiments, he would run out eventually. Then what would he have to do? Go out and get more. How do you ask? The same way Fresh gets a host naturally, killing other innocent people to fuel this creature.

When I finally fell asleep, it was the same Nightmare I've been having, but this time, when I reached for the soul that I assumed was mine, another hand reached out. It was Dust. His eyes were dark, he looked exhausted, along with the voices that begged me to stay within my confinement, I heard Dust's voice yelling at me louder than all the other voices combined.

"IT'S ALL YOUR FAULT."

He was right, I caused this, this was all my fault. I felt myself tear up a bit in the nightmare, I knew I deserved this. I felt a slash across my chest as Dust attacked me, still yelling at me. Then it stopped, I was left in silence for what felt like an eternity.

Then I woke up. Although I slept a good amount, I was still exhausted. When Geno woke up, I pretended to look as normal as I could, I guess he didn't notice.

I realized as we wore on, I was doing the same thing Fresh was doing when I was possessed. I put on a mask. I never told Geno about my nightmares, I pretended that the guilt of having someone that's already been through so much torture going through something more because of me didn't affect me. It sickened me to think that I was acting like Fresh, like this I felt safe. I hate to say it, but while being possessed, I felt safer. I didn't have to face how much of a disappointment I was, I didn't have to confront the people that worried about me, and given the choice, I would have kept my mouth shut the whole way, maybe this wouldn't have happened.