Longing (Steve Rogers x reader)

Mission prep

Waking up in the morning with Steve still beside you felt like a dream. You looked up at him and caught him gazing down at you with a soft smile on his face. You moved off of his chest and quickly kissed him softly on the lips. Without either of you saying anything he got out of bed and out onto the balcony to go to his room while you got up to go do your business before changing into just a pair of blue sweatpants and a t-shirt with Steve's sweater. You called to Roxy and she quickly followed you to the door, and Steve stood outside of it with his suite door wide open and the unmistakable smell of coffee coming out into the hallway. Steve took your hand, since Roxy no longer needed the leash and he led you down the hallway.
Roxy was quick to do her business this morning, and with the cold morning it was outside, you were grateful she didn't want to stay out too long. Steve led you both back inside and he went to his suite to make you both a coffee. You went to your suite and grabbed one of your throw blankets and made your way outside to your swing. Steve wasn't long in coming back out with both coffees and he quickly brought them over, nabbing the seat right next to you and putting his arm over your shoulders and pulling you in close. The two of you watched the sun rise sipping on your coffee, enjoying your morning coffee. Once you were done, Steve went back into his room to get ready for the day while you made your way downstairs early.

After breakfast you went to the artillery room and started going through all of your gear and looked over your new catsuit with the additional Kevlar. You started with your guns, cleaning them and putting them back together. You moved onto your knives and sharpened the edges so they were like razors. Bucky, and Sam were in the room working on their own weapons. Steve came in a few times to check on you a few times, seeming on edge almost. You gave him a questioning gaze, but he gave a quick reassuring smile every time your eyes would meet. He would leave the room temporarily, but he always ended up coming back within thirty minutes. By lunch time you knew it was getting on Bucky and Sam's nerves. You found he was just being adorable. When you came back from lunch you started packing up everything that you needed to go to the jet, meticulously making sure it was ready for you to gear up when you left the jet. Steve made his way into the room again and Bucky growled from where he was putting his weapons into a duffel bag.
"Listen Punk, you've been under our feet all day. You want to go, you shouldn't have gotten shot" Bucky finally voiced his opinion.
"I could still dance circles around you, ya jerk" Steve shot back instantly and wrapped his arms around you, pulling you in. He had been trying to be respectful that you were working all day, but he was anxious about you leaving on a longer mission without him. He wanted to be there, especially for such a big base.
"Unlikely, unless you are still taking the pain medication every few hours like you are supposed to" Bucky gave Steve a level gaze who quickly looked away.
"Are you supposed to be taking your pain killers more often, Steve?" you murmured softly against his well defined chest.

"I take them when you ask me to" he flushed slightly.
"Please go take them, and make sure to keep taking them while I'm gone if the pain is still there" you gave a slight pout. He grimaced, but then nodded and gave a soft smile.
"I'll go take them now if you come with me" he looked at you hopefully.
"I'll bring your bag to the jet" Bucky grabbed your artillery bag and motioned for you to go. Steve grinned and grabbed your hand, pulling you out of the room and upstairs. He brought you into his room and as soon as the door was closed, he pushed you up against it, putting one of his knees between your legs.
"Medication first" you felt heat go automatically to your core in anticipation of what he had in store for you.
"Stay right there" he ordered and hurried to his bathroom. You maintained your position on the door, thinking of how you still needed to grab a shower before you had supper because it was wheels up as soon as the meal was over. Steve was back in a flash and he grabbed you by the hips and picked you up and he turned his body so he fell backwards over the side of the couch with a laugh, keeping you on top of him, you fell on top with a loud omph.
"Steve!" you burst out laughing. "I have to get ready for my mission" you sat up, putting your legs on either side of his hips.
"Give me five minutes" he pouted slightly after slowing to a chuckle. "Just let me hold you" he pulled at your arm, and you laid forward, trying to keep your weight off the wounded side of his chest. You saw his face constrict in pain, and you tried to move, but his arms cemented you to your spot.
"We shouldn't be doing this," you murmured softly.
"Promise me you'll be safe" he whispered to you, and you looked up to see worry etched in his face.
"Of course I'll be safe" you reassured him gently. "I'll check in when I can, I already promised to send you pictures" you reminded him.
"Video call me if you can?" he asked softly.
"If I get the chance, of course I will" you promised. "You know, you went on a few day mission last week and you didn't check in" you reminded him.
"It was the longest mission of my life" he groaned. "I wanted to check in, but I couldn't risk it"
"If I can risk it, I'll check in" you reassured him again.
"Make sure you are back by Friday, we are going to Clint's place for the weekend" he reminded you.
"I can't miss out on that, I want to hear how the kids Halloween went" your face broke out into a smile. "Laura sent me some pictures of them dressed up, but I want to hear it from them"
"So what all do we do at Clint's place?" Steve wanted to keep you there as long as possible, and he could feel your body relaxing talking about Clint and his kids.
"Saturday's we go horseback riding, then come back and the boys play video games while Clint plays in Lila's hair and I usually help Laura make supper. Sunday's are normally quiet, just staying around the house mainly. We have pancakes in the morning, and just let the rest of the day play out. I help Laura make supper again, and then Clint flies us back" you whispered.
"Do you ever think about stuff like that? Having family and kids?" Steve asked quietly.
"I've always wanted it," you whispered. "With the right partner of course" you added. "And you?" you asked, biting your lower lip in anticipation of his response.
"Always wanted it, with the right partner" he grinned, gazing at you lovingly. He reached over and brushed some of your hair out of your face and tilted his head to kiss you on the tip of your nose. "It's felt like I've been heading from one warzone to another all these years, it's nice to have a little bit of peace right here in the center of it"
"You've never found peace?" you asked a little worriedly.
"Not until the last year" he shook his head. "It was fleeting and rare at first, but the more I was around this beautiful woman, the more I felt at peace" he gave a smile and you flushed, realizing he was speaking about you. "And now that I have this little bit of peace all to myself..." he rubbed his hand up and down your back. "I'm not sure I'm willing to part with her"
"You'll be fine. You are only benched for the week" you reminded him softly. "Then it's back into the fray"
"As long as it's with you" he kissed your forehead. "I can handle it" he winked at you.
"As long as it's with you, I can too" you whispered and nuzzled in a little more.
"We haven't talked about sex yet" he brought it up out of the blue.
"I'm on birth control, although I hate taking it. It regulates me, and the cramps aren't as bad" you answered frankly.
"You actually willingly take medication?" he arched an eyebrow. "You fought taking the pain killers" he reminded you.
"That kind of pain I can handle, cramps I cannot" you flushed. "That's when you see me lay around more than sitting"
"Good to know, next time let me know. I'll go buy you ice cream and give you back massages" he promised, making you giggle.
"Are you going to kiss it better too?" you giggled.
"Oh, there are endless kisses coming your way for the rest of your life if you can handle it" he vowed, giving you another kiss on your forehead.
"I'm also clean, I was checked a year ago, as well as six months ago" you whispered.
"I'm clean too. I was checked at the same time as you" he continued rubbing your back. "Can I read some of your books while you're gone?"
"Sure, you have full access to my suite" you nodded. "The treats I'll leave out for Tom and Roxy. The books are all on the bookshelves" you added softly.
"Did you finish the one you were reading yesterday?" he cocked an eyebrow.
"That's done and it's on my bedside table" you nodded, and your alarm went off on your phone. "Looks like our time is up. I have to go grab a shower and pack my undergarments and medication" you gave his chest a kiss before squirming slightly, intending to stand up.
"Just give me another minute" he pulled you in more.
"Steve, I have to get ready," you giggled. "I'll sit with you at supper" you promised.
"One kiss before you go" he bartered with you. You smiled and leaned up, massaging your lips against his. He hummed happily and pulled you in more so he could deepen the kiss. You gave a soft moan in the back of your throat as his tongue danced with your own. You felt his hands roaming your body and his erection grew even harder against you. "Do we have time for another play by play of last night?" he asked a little hopefully.
"No, but maybe when I get back" you gave him one last chaste kiss on the lips before regretfully pulling away. You shimmied off of his body and got up on your feet.
"My room or yours when you get back?" he grinned, drinking in your form.
"Either or, I'm not picky as long as Tom and Roxy are comfortable. Although the litter box is in my room" you reminded him.
"We'll sleep in yours, maybe put some music on nice and slow" he started to sit up grinning at you.
"One of your playlists for a change" you nodded.
"Sit with me at supper" he didn't really ask.
"Of course I will," you promised. "I have to go take my shower or else I'll never get to it" you took a few steps back.
"I'll meet you downstairs" he finally gave in and you hurried from the room.