It's Better to Burn Out than Fade Away-Kurt Cobain

Chapter 102

December 22, 1993

"You guys want to go meet Santa?" I got out of the car and unbuckled Lorelai, then grabbed out both strollers out of the trunk. I put Melissa in one while Kurt put Frances in the other. "Lorelai, you need to stay by me the whole time, okay?"

"Okay," She said. 

"Ready to go?" I asked Kurt as I watched him buckle Frances. 

"Is Melissa even buckled?" He asked. 

I checked her, but she wasn't. I buckled her quickly and then we walked inside of the mall. 

"Look at us," I smiled at Kurt. 

"I'm really proud of you," He kissed me. 

I wanted to tell him I felt the same, but then I remembered last night. I quickly got that image out of my brain and focused on the line to meet Santa Claus. It wasn't too long since we got there early in the morning. 

We stood in line and Lorelai was just in awe. 

"Look! It's Santa!" She shouted. 

"When I was younger, I used to wonder how Santa could be in every mall at once," I told Kurt. "And that was when I started doubting Santa."

"I don't remember Santa or anything like that."

"That's because you don't really focus on the good parts of your childhood."

"How can I?"

"I'll help you with that. We need to start planning the wedding, okay?"

"Okay."

"Like, immediately."

"Don't we already have some things figured out?"

"We have the venue picked out, but that's it. I need to get a dress, and we need to figure out food, costs of everything, and-"

"Hey," He gripped my hands tightly. "Stop stressing yourself out."

After standing in line for ten minutes, it was our turn to go up their. 

"Go say hi!" I told Lorelai. 

She ran up to him and sat on his lap. 

"Ho ho ho," He chuckled. 

"Do we all want to get a picture together?" I asked him. 

"We might have to if we want Melissa and Frances to be in the picture. We both know that they won't be sitting still."

We set the strollers to the side and took the girls out of them. We walked over to Santa. 

"Kurt Cobain?" He asked. 

"How do you know my Daddy's name?!" Lorelai practically yelled. 

"Sweetie, a lot of people know your dad," I chuckled. 

"Are you going to put the girls on my lap?" He asked. 

That sounded a little weird to me, but I didn't think too much of it. 

"Is that alright?" Kurt asked. 

"Yeah," He smiled. 

We put Melissa and Frances on his lap and tried holding their bodies to make them sit still. Kurt and I stood behind the chair. 

"Alright, one...two...three...say 'Cheese'!" The photographer said. 

We all smiled and Kurt placed his other hand on my back. After she took the picture, I took Melissa off of his lap quickly. 

"Come on, Lorelai," I grabbed her hand. We all walked over to the photographer as another family walked up to Santa Claus. 

I did not like that man. 

"I'll go put the girls in the strollers while you get the picture, okay?" I kissed Kurt and walked away with Frances, Melissa, and Lorelai. 

I put Frances in her car seat and buckled her, then did the same with Melissa. Kurt came back holding a couple of pictures in his hands. 

"Let me see them," I said. 

He showed me them and they turned out very well. 

"Okay, is it just me or is that man kind of creepy?" I asked him. 

"It's just the way he worded the whole 'sitting on my lap' thing was fucking weird."

"I know. Alright, girls, let's go get some lunch."

We went up to the food court and I ordered some food while Kurt stayed with the girls. I got us all burgers and fries and got some fries for Melissa and Frances to share. I sat back down next to Kurt and gave Lorelai her food, then Kurt. 

"I got some fries for those two," I pointed to Melissa and Frances. "You little troublemakers."

"Look at their smiles," Kurt said softly as they both smiled. 

I split a fry in half and gave one to each of them. An older lady came up to us. 

"You have a beautiful family," She croaked. 

"Thank you," I said. 

"I remember being as young as you two and in love with my husband with our own kids. He passed five years ago."

"I am so sorry to hear that."

"Hi," She said to Lorelai. 

"I'm eating a burger," Lorelai had ketchup all over her face. 

"I don't understand how you are always so messy," I took a napkin and wiped her face with it. 

"I hope you guys have a wonderful rest of your day," She said. 

"You too," Kurt told her as she walked away. "That was kind of her."

"We are a beautiful family," I said again. "We are so lucky that we are able to afford things, Kurt. Some people can't."

"We are very lucky," He gave Melissa and Frances another fry. 

-------------------------------------------------------------------

As soon as I got home, I called my mom. 

"Mom," I said. 

"What?" She asked. 

"We need to go shopping for a wedding dress for me. The wedding is in a couple months and I don't even have a dress, Mom. I'm so stressed out. We've been procrastinating so much."

"I'll help you get things situated, okay? When would you like to go get a dress?"

"Probably after New Year's."

"Okay. What else do you need to figure out for the wedding?"

"We have the venue picked out. We need to figure out who we're inviting, cater, music, and I think that might be it, but I don't know."

"Are you guys having a big wedding?"

"No, not really. I mean, there's not a lot of family on Kurt's side (none that he would want to invite anyway), and there's not a lot on my side, either."

"What about the parties?"

"What parties?"

"Groomsmen and bridesmaids."

"Oh right. Kurt is doing Krist and Dave and I'll be doing Jennifer and Shelli."

"Okay. You need to pick out colors, then for them."

"I need to write this all down is what I need to do."

"So, you should ask those people if they'll be your groomsmen and bridesmaids, then have them pick out the bachelor and bachelorette parties. Then, they should tell you what the date is."

"Thanks, Mom."

"You're welcome."

"Bye."

"I love you."

"I love you, too."