The Holiday That Changed My Life

Part One Hundred and Forty Five

A couple of weeks after the wedding and eight months after our fertility tests and still not even the smallest glimpse of pregnancy. And we've only got three more months until we give up trying and go ahead with the adoption process. I didn't want to but by the looks of how things are going right now, it seems like our only option.

No one can say that we didn't try. We were trying about two times a day, if that. But for the last few days or so, I've not been feeling up to it at all. I just wasn't in the mood for anything really, I think I'm just giving up on this baby thing already. It's just like we're trying for no reason.

Aston's been at work all day today with the boys, meetings about singles, album tracklists and whatnot. Whereas I've been working from home with my sketch pad, trying to come up with some new designs ready for next summer after New York; there's only so much you can do with floral patterns, looks like I'll be using a lot of pastel colours next year.

"Hey baby." Aston smiled as he came into the living room after closing the front door behind him.

"Hey, how was work?" I asked as he leaned over the back of the couch to kiss me gently.

"Long," He sighed, sitting next to me as he slung his backpack off his shoulder and onto the floor. "Those meetings went on forever. But we've sorted when the single's being released so it's a start. How's your day been?"

"As good as it can be, these aren't as good as what they normally are though." I sighed as Aston took a look over my shoulder at my drawings.

"They look okay to me." He shrugged as I placed my sketch pad onto the coffee table.

"I guess. I just don't feel up to it, I'm exhausted today."

"Looks like someone's having an early night tonight then," Aston laughed as he nudged my arm. "But I've got something for you first."

He leant forward and dug a Boots carrier bag out of his backpack and I instantly knew what was in there and what he wanted me to do.

"Ast I-"

"Please?" He asked, putting the bag on my knee.

"I don't feel pregnant, isn't that enough?" I sighed, not wanting to see another negative test.

"We just need to make sure. Just take these and we'll leave it for a few weeks, I promise."

Aston looked at me with his pleading puppy dog eyes, which he knew I couldn't resist. I sighed as I opened the bag, seeing three tests in their boxes and the receipt.

"Fine, but then can we please leave it for a while?" I asked, sick of taking tests every other week.

"Yeah, I promise." He smiled as he took my hands and pulled me up off the couch.

Aston led me upstairs and sat on our bed whilst I went into the bathroom to do the tests. It took me a few minutes to actually do the tests, I had to lean against the sink for a while to compose myself. Once I'd kind of settled my nerves, I took the tests and left them on the sink before washing my hands and going back into our bedroom. Aston was sat on his side by the pillows, now changed into his joggers and t-shirt, something more comfier than his jeans.

"Three minutes?" Aston asked as I went to sit beside him.

"Yeah." I breathed out as he wrapped his arms around me.

"It's okay if it comes back negative you know?" Aston said after a moment of silence.

"No it's not Ast, it's been over a year since we started trying and we've got nothing, we might as well give up." I sighed as he pressed a kiss against the top of my head.

"Listen, one way or another we're going to be parents."

"I just want it to be this way."

"I know you do, I do too." Aston sighed, kissing my head again.

"I can't handle any more negatives Ast."

"I know baby, I can't either. But after these we won't do any more for a while."

We sat in silence for the next two minutes waiting for these tests. Aston wants a baby just as much as me, and I know he's only saying these things to try and make me feel better. I think as we get closer to the two year mark, we're both getting annoyed and even more upset whenever we have to take a test.

"Babe?..You listening?" Aston asked, knocking me out of my daze.

"What? Yeah." I stuttered as I nodded my head.

"Times up, we need to go look."

30+ votes for the next part!

The result might not be what you lot are all hoping for😉

Comments?

Thankyou so much for reading..as always x