You felt sick. Really sick.
"You look beautiful" Lita said as you stood in the mirror. You watched her fan her eyes as Rach told her to get a grip. You had your hand on the mirror as you tried to steady yourself.
"Oh shit, she's having a panic attack." Dawn said pushing a chair behind you as you sat down. It felt like your lungs were closing in on you.
"What if he stands me up? What if he changes his mind? I can't do this, I can't.." You felt emotions coming back from your previous relationship. Him leaving you engaged for someone else. You had been promised this stuff before and it didn't work out. What made today different? You couldn't take the thought of being up there alone.
"I can't go out there, I can't, I can't" You gasped as Lita handed you a paper bag. "There's been so many signs I shouldn't do this.."
"Stop talking like an asshole" Lita glared at you. "Go Get Tommy."
Dawn nodded and ran out of the hotel room, leaving Lita to rant at you.
"Bitch I did not get done up to look this good for a wedding to not happen" Lita sat opposite you and you inhaled and exhaled into the bag. "He loves you. He won't stand you up. Nikki isn't afraid of commitment love. That's you."
You shook your head and Lita nodded.
"Everytime you get close to a guy you bolt. As long as I've known you you've done this. I'm surprised you've gone this long without freaking out. I won't let you leave Sixxter at that altar" Lita threatened.
"It's just not right Lita. I'm not meant to do the marrying thing. I don't know why I keep pretending.."
Dawn came back and held the door closed behind her, motioning Lita over.
"Nikki's behind the door" Dawn hissed "I tried to be coy when talking to Tommy but he's got a fucking big mouth."
"Don't tell her he's here" Lita stayed and Dawn nodded walking back over to you and Rach, trying to keep you calm.
Dawn looked at you worriedly as you felt a weight lift off your shoulders. Everytime you looked in the mirror you felt scared. You didn't want to get hurt.
The door opened and Lita came back in and motioned for you to come over.
"Give me your arm" She instructed and you did so. She edged you near the gap of the door as a hand the other side held yours.
"Nikki, I'm terrified" You explained putting your head against the door as he rubbed your hand.
"Stop freaking out." He instructed calmly. You felt him press a kiss to your hand. "Remember that song I wrote about you and your insecurities?"
"I remember, you called me out for being afraid of everything" You chuckled as a sob escaped you. "You hit the nail on the head"
"You are already my wife. Today is just the day we get the title. We've been through everything. Today is just the party to celebrate." Nikki explained as you swallowed.
"I don't want to mess this up Nikki.." You said quietly and he kissed your hand again.
"You won't. All you have to do is trust me.."
—-
Lita made quick work of redoing your face and you stared in the mirror once more, surrounded by your three closest friends. They were teary and so we You. You looked good. You looked elegant.
"Come on Babe, we've got fellas to impress" Lita said hitting you on the ass. You picked up the ends of your dress and headed down the stairs, taking a deep breath.
You bundled into the car and tried to drink your champagne. It proved difficult with your hands shaking.
"Okay step two,.." Lita said helping you out the car and adjusting your veil. "We walk around the back of this building and into the wedding.."
You nodded as you followed them slowly around the old castle looking building you and Nikki had chosen. It was decorated partly for your wedding and partly for Halloween. Just how Nikki wanted. You spotted everyone on the hill, watching you walk down as the soft music played. You met Mick at the bottom as he interlocked his arms with yours.
"You look beautiful kid" Mick murmured as you walked up the aisle slowly. You blushed as you got to the top and kissed Mick on the cheek. He handed you over to Nikki and you swallowed hard. He was so handsome. He had his tux on, the shirt wasn't fully done up with his hair brushed back out of his face. He shot you the signature smile and you blushed as he lifted your veil.
You went through the normal stuff, but you were in a daze just looking at Nikki staring at you.
"I believe you have written your own vows.." The monster said and you nodded.
"Nikki.." You tried to clear your wobbly voice as you apologised. He squeezed your hand and you chuckled to yourself.
"It wasn't exactly love at first sight" You started as people laughed and cheered. "In my mind Nikki Sixx was someone who was an over the top party animal who acted like an overgrown teenager most the time. You showed me that I was wrong about..most of my assumptions of you.."
"You always make me feel like the luckiest girl in the world. And even when things are at their worst, you always let me know how special I am to you. And although nerves are getting the better of me right now, I will spend today and the rest of my life showing you how special you are to me. I will forever be grateful to have you in my life Nikki. "
Nikki stood there for a second as he took out his paper from his pocket.
"I initially swore I would never do this again. But then I met you, my angel. And you showed me everything I was missing out on. You didn't make relationships feel like hard work or a job. It felt like finally having someone who understood everything. You know how to pull me from my darkest places and how to make me laugh when I'm not feeling good. You have taken care of me in ways I don't think you understand. There isn't anybody else out there like you. I've been waiting for you for a very long time. And now I finally have you, there's nothing thats gonna make me change my mind. I love you babe."
"I love you too" You said with a smile. The minister called for the rings and Gunner brought them over. Nikki scruffed up his hair before taking the rings from him.
You said your I do's and Nikki pulled you to him kissing you deeply. You didn't wanna let go as you smiled into his kiss as everyone cheered and whistled you both.
"Halloween party in the castle!" Tommy yelled at everyone as Nikki picked you up and carried you off.
—/
Your first dance was to Angel by Aerosmith. There was no other choice really. It was kinda slow, but not slow enough for Nikki to cringe. You both sang along to the chorus as you danced with a smile.
After the first chorus, you called everyone else to come dance too. Lita was dancing with Tommy considering Heather and Chris didn't wanna attend the wedding. Vince even danced with Sharise.
"We finally made it.." Nikki said as he put his head against yours. "Are you happy?"
"I'm so happy" You smiled, he kissed you once more before kissing your head.
Nikki had instructed everyone to dress up as sinister as they wanted. Some people pulled it off..and some people really didn't. You laughed as Jon came over to say congratulations to you.
"This a really great wedding" He smiled as he kissed you on the cheek and shook Nikki's hand.
"Thank you Jon, I'm glad you made it" You smiled as he introduced you to his wife as well. You shook her hand before they wandered off.
"You invited the whole of Bon Jovi to our wedding?" Nikki questioned and you smiled.
"If you think that's shocking, look who else is here" You murmured back as Jani walked over to you with a big smile.
"You look gorgeous" Jani said kissing your cheek. Nikki looked at him smugly as Jani stuck a hand out to him.
"Well, I'm not gonna pretend that I'm not heartbroken. But congratulations" Jani said as Nikki finally shook his hand.
"I have some friends Jani. In fact, if you go speak to Lita her friend Bobbi is here looking for her own bachelor.." You smirked pointing over the blonde woman in the corner.
"Well if you're cool with me moving on.."
"She's super fine with it" Nikki interrupted. "I'm pulling my wife away now.."
You went through the traditional stuff with Nikki as the night went on, the soft songs had mainly stopped and Nikki was pretty buzzed from drinking. John, his sponsor was there to support you both also.
"Tommy, wanna have a dance?" You asked and he smiled, taking your hand.
"I really appreciate you being here today" You said as he put his arms around you.
"I'm glad I didn't miss it. What was your freak out earlier about?" He asked as you both swayed to whatever song was playing.
"I felt like I wasn't good enough, and that I should probably bolt. Or that Nikki would leave me up there" You confessed. "But it's all good now."
"I'm glad." Tommy said as you both looked at Nikki laughing with John. "He's really happy with you. I know this is gonna be different to his first."
"I hope so" You smiled "I do love him T Bone. And I love you for being here"
"It's all good babe" Tommy smiled hugging you.
—-
"I have a surprise for you" Nikki said patting the seat next to him. You frowned as the lights went darker as Jani, Tommy and Lita got on stage.
"I know it's your favourite song.." Nikki murmured.
"How I love the way you move and the sparkle in your eyes
There's a color deep inside them like a blue suburban sky
When I come home late at night and you're in bed asleep
I wrap my arms around you so I can feel you breath
I don't need to be a superman
As long as you will always be my biggest fan
Heaven isn't too far away
Closer to it every day
No matter what your friends might say..."
Nikki kissed your cheek as you felt yourself sobbing again as you watched. Lita smiled at you as she played, with Tommy on his little tambourine.
It had been an emotional day, you were overwhelmed with so many feelings. You caught Vince looking at you and he blew you a kiss as Sharise waved at you. You smiled as you wiped your eyes.
When they finished, Nikki walked over to the stage and cleared his throat into the mic. You smiled as he got some claps and some wolf whistles.
"Me and my beautiful wife would like to thank you all for joining us tonight. We picked a beautiful day that really matched our crazy ways. You have all made today really special.
You are all welcome to carry on having a good time, but me and my wife have a honeymoon that we need to go on in a couple of hours. And apparently we're meant to have more sex than usual tonight, so we really have to get started on that.."
You laughed as he waved you over. You blew a kiss to everyone as Nikki picked you up and took you back to your suite.