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My dad had left for the airport over an hour ago, which made home feel alone again. 

As I got dressed for the day, I could see that I had gained some weight. This was annoying, since I couldn't fit into my favorite pair of jeans anymore. 

Great another side effect from the antidepressants.

If this continued to be a problem I'm sure the tabloids would say that I was having Shay's love child. The thought made me want to gag. 

I threw on an oversized button up and some jeans that did fit, hoping that it would conceal the weight gain. 

My jeans definitely outlined my curves more, but I wasn't sure it was in a good way.

I looked at myself in the mirror, knowing that the magazines would eat me alive if this medicine kept messing with me. 

At least Shay wasn't in the car that was coming to get me, so at least I'd get to sit there in silence. 

After arriving at the studio I went straight to my studio, ignoring the fact that next door was the one and only One Direction.

Darren looked at me, rushing in through the door and eyed me suspiciously.

"Relax, Darren. I'm just ignoring the group next door" I said, setting my backpack down next to him.

"Anymore thoughts on the song choice for the awards?" he asked, changing the subject, which I greatly appreciated.

"Honestly, I have no idea, because I don't want to just sing a ballad" I said.

He nodded "Yeah, you'd definitely want to perform something fast"

"Maybe I should write something for it"

I wanted something new and none of my new songs just had what I was wanting to put out there. 

"So are we still recording 'Where Do You Go'?" he asked. I nodded

"As far as I know" I said.

I recorded the acoustics for it yesterday, which took some time, but the instrumental sounds good.

I took my denim jacket off and tossed it on the chair next to Darren.

"Whenever you're ready" he said. I nodded and went to the recording booth.

This song really meant a lot and according to Darren it was perfect with the sound I was going for on this album. 

I placed the headphones on my head and took a deep breath, waiting for the music to fill my ears. 


(Play Video)


I'm as blue as blue can be
I'm surprised you even recognize me
When you're gone for seven weeks
Not surprised if you're done with me
You think I'm fine
You've been so blind, lagging behind



This facade is tough to keep
I'll be there when I can bear
Don't wait up for me
No, I haven't had much sleep
I've been counting all the moons on the balcony
You think it's a lie
I'm telling you why
I'm lagging behind
I'm losing my mind
But you've been so blind, lagging behind



Where do you go when you feel no good
Where do you go when you know you should
What do you say when you feel that way
Where do you go (where do you go)
Where do you go away


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