Can We Fall One More Time? (Sequel To Gotta Be You)

-107-

Declan was seated across from me, as we sat at the kitchen island. He was spending the day with me, while Liam was back in the studio, working on the new album. 

My hands were shaky as I took a drink of my coffee. 

"Are you sure you should be drinking that, while you're, well shaky?" he asked, looking at me concerned.

I nodded "It's the just the tremors in my hands; it's fine"

"Liam must be doing a lot better since he's already back int he studio"

"Yeah, he was excited. He's been writing some new stuff with Louis"

Darren was babbling as he sat in his high chair, eating his dry cereal.

"Darren has officially started mama" I smiled.

"Really?"

I nodded.

Darren said dada right before his birthday, and of course this made Liam so happy. So when Darren said mama a few days ago, it made me ecstatic. 

"How are you doing?" he asked.

I sighed "I think I'm doing a little bit better. Although, sometimes I wake up feeling like he's gone, and if it happens when he's in the bathroom or something" I shook my head as I teared up, and quickly wiped my eyes.

"Gracie" he said, placing his hand over mine.

"It's fine, it's just that everyone seems to be so calm about everything and I don't understand why I can't move on" I went to my purse and took out my pill bottle, shaking as I took one.

"Gracie" Declan said from behind me.

I took a deep breath "My anxiety is so horrible; the attacks are happening more frequently, and I just can't deal with them on my own anymore"

"You don't have to be alone though"

Darren pushed his bowl of dry cereal off the high chair, and I went to get it but Declan stopped me. 

"Sit down and let me get it"

I sat back at the island and put my head in my hands.

Declan refilled his sippy cup and gave it to him, after cleaning up the mess "Have you told Liam any of this?"

"Slowly; bits and pieces keep coming out. He's worried about me, of course; but that just makes me not want to say anymore" I sighed "I don't want to worry him anymore"

He put his arm around me "You've got to take care of yourself, Gracie"

"Believe me, I'm trying"

He sat back down "I have some good news"

"What's that?'

"I got a new job here in London"

My eyes widened "Really?"

He nodded "Yeah, it's another job as a bartender; but now I just have to find a new place to live and sell the bungalow, because I'm supposed to start in a couple weeks"

"Why don't you stay here" I suggested.

"What?"

I smiled and picked up Darren "Follow me"

Declan followed me down the hallway where the laundry room was "Are you sure?"

"Declan, this place has six bedrooms; and I'm acting a little selfish because I'd love to have someone here with me"

We went up the stairs just above the garage.

"So, this room could be yours. There's a bathroom and a little kitchen area" I said, walking into the room "It's also pretty much separate from the rest of the house, since it's above the garage. You'd have privacy"

He smiled and looked around "You should talk to Liam about this before I give an answer"

"That's fair" I looked at him "But if he says yes?"

"Then I would love to live here" he said, pulling me into a hug "You're too nice, Gracie"

I smiled "But a bit selfish for wanting you to be here"

"Then continue to be selfish" he chuckled, looking around "I'll have to rent out a storage center"

"You can store some things in the garage. We only have the one car, and it mostly stays outside anyway"

He took Darren from me "Do you want your Uncle Declan around more?"

Darren giggled.

"I think I will take that as a yes" he chuckled.

We went back downstairs, finding Liam there.

"You're already back?" I asked.

He nodded "Yeah, we were just finishing up the single"

Darren reached for Liam "Dada"

Liam happily took him in his arms "What are you two up to?"

"I was just showing Declan the room above the garage"

He gave me a look "Okay?"

"Declan found a job in London, and he needs to start in a couple weeks. I thought maybe he could live here while he the bungalow gets sold and he can find a new place" I smiled.

"There's too many rooms here anyway" Liam said, smiling at me "And this idea seems to make you really happy"

I grinned "You have no idea!"

Declan patted Liam's shoulder "Thanks, man"

"Besides, Darren would love to see his uncle more than once a week"

I smiled at Liam "How was being in the studio?"

"It's different"

"Do you guys miss Zayn?"

He nodded "We get that he wanted to move on, but it's still weird recording new stuff without him. I'm taking on most of the vocals that he would normally have, so that's new"

"I know you all will find a balance"

"Yeah, and we just have the single to work on right now; it'll be out by the end of the month" he took a deep breath "We did come to the decision about something though"

"Yeah?"

He nodded "We're going to take a hiatus after the album comes out. We'll make appearances, but starting in 2016, we'll be taking a break"

"Is it a break or are you all breaking up?" Declan asked.

"It's a break; we have just been going at it since X-Factor, and there hasn't been a real break. We want to explore some things on our own, and just enjoy not being so busy"

"That's a big decision"

He nodded "I don't mean to steal your idea, but we just felt like it was the right thing to do. We'll announce the hiatus after the single comes out, and work on an album. We want to give something to the fans, since we won't be touring"

I hugged him "How are you processing this?"

"Slowly, but knowing that I don't have to worry about touring is nice" he smiled at me "I can focus on us"

"That part I like"

He looked at Declan "Which is why I like that you'll be here. The album is set to be released in November, so we'll be in the studio a lot"

"I'm happy to help out in anyway that I can"

"Thank you, Declan" Liam said.

It seemed like a new chapter was about to happen for both of us.