In case you needed further proof that the human race is doomed through stupidity, here are some actual labels on consumer goods:
1. On a Sears hairdryer: “Do not use while sleeping.” (That's the only time I have to work on my hair!)
2. On a bag of Fritos: “You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside.” (The shoplifting special.
3. On a bar of Dial soap: “Directions: use like regular soap.” (And that would be how...?)
4. On some Swanson frozen dinners: “Serving suggestion: Defrost.” (But, it's “just” a suggestion.)
5. On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom): “Do not turn upside down.” (Well... duh, a bit late, huh!)
6. On Marks and Spencer Bread Pudding: “Product will be hot after heating.” (...And you thought?...)
7. On packaging for a Rowenta iron: “Do not iron clothes on body.” (But wouldn't this save me time?)
8. On Boot's Children Cough Medicine: “Do not drive a car or operate machinery after taking this medication.” (We could do a lot to reduce the rate of construction accidents if we could just get those 5-year-olds with head-colds off those forklifts.)
9. On Nytol Sleep Aid: “Warning: may cause drowsiness.” (And... I'm taking this because?)
10. On most brands of Christmas lights: “For indoor or outdoor use only.” (As opposed to... what?)
11. On a Japanese food processor: “Not to be used for the other use.” (Now, somebody out there, help me on this. I'm a bit curious.)
12. On Sansbury's peanuts: “Warning: contains nuts.” (Talk about a news flash.)
13. On an American Airlines packet of nuts: “Instructions: Open packet, eat nuts.” (Step 3: maybe, uh... fly Delta?)
14. On a child's superman costume: “Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly.” (I don't blame the company. I blame the parents for this one.)
15. On a Swedish chainsaw: “Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands.” (… Was there a lot of this happening somewhere?)
16. On a hair straightener: “Do not use in water.” (Yes, because I always straighten my hair when I am taking a bath.)
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Normal is Overrated (Joke and Funnies Book)
RandomJust some random sayings that are very funny. My friend and I found them on the internet so I am sorry if there is a copy write problem. I also will edit the language on some of the jokes. Just to let you know! Enjoy! 7/4/16: I have edited this stor...
