Secrets spilled

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"Here you go," I tell Harry as I set his drink down in front of him. He nods and scoots the coffee table a little further away from his legs. Louis frowns at him and makes a show of leaning forward and reaching for his coffee. Harry smiles at him happily and stretches his legs out with a contented sigh. 

I glance at the couch, where Louis and Harry are sitting together. Liam is laying on the chair next to the couch, his legs dangling over one armrest and his head settled on the other. I take a step towards the couch and then another, cementing my decision. Louis scoots closer to Harry to make room for me to sit down. 

I cross my legs and Harry sips his tea as we wait for Louis to start speaking. However he doesn't seem to realize that we're waiting on him because he hasn't even looked up from the coffee in his hand yet. A minute passes and I catch Liam's eye and smile awkwardly. Harry sighs and gently taps Louis's leg to get his attention.

"Hmmm?" Louis lifts his head and glances around the room. "Oh, you were ready to start eh? Sorry." He smirks a little. "What I wanted to discuss is why exactly you two," he motions to Liam and I "were keeping news about Liam's recovery to yourselves."

"What?" Harry gasps, turning to Liam in surprise. "What were you keeping from us?" 

"You're hardly the last one to know," Louis says with a frown, "Liam told me that his doctor has yet to be told either. Have you told his family?" He directs the question to me.

"Look, it's hardly fair to come here and start accusing us like this." I feel myself getting a little angry. "Should we have told you? Yes, we should have. You have to understand, however, how busy and crazy it's been lately. We've been adjusting to our lives being rearranged somewhat with Liam getting better at such a steady pace. I completely forgot to call your and Karen."

"I should have mentioned it to my doctor," Liam admits "I have seen him several times since I've noticed a particular urge-"

"Whoa, wait!" Harry interjects, holding up a hand "What urges are you talking about here? I still don't know what everyone is talking about."

"Basically, Liam has begun having little voices in his head telling him to do or say odd things." Louis sums up for his husband.

"That's not quite what it is," Liam corrects him. "It's not voices. I just feel like I should do or say something. And," he adds with a hopeful smile, "they're not always bad urges. Sometimes it's just to compliment someone at work about their performance or new haircut. I've had some urges to hit people on the street too of course, but those are few and far between." 

"Still, shouldn't you have told your doctor?" Harry plays with one of the many rings on his fingers. "If there were even just a few that were violent, knowing your past and erhm well having heard what you'd done and that sort of thing..." he trails off with a shrug of his shoulders and a glance to Louis.

"He's exactly right, you should have told your doctors." Louis says.

"But I can understand," I'm quick to try to help them understand where Liam and I are coming from. "It has been a whirlwind. If I'm remembering correctly, it was almost an accident that Liam told me-"

"What!? You were having thoughts that weren't your own and you didn't tell anyone?" Louis cries out in disbelief.

"Look, I just thought that maybe this would mean that I was relapsing!" Liam tries to explain himself.

"I definitely think that's exactly what it is," Louis says "bloody hell Liam."

"Now hold on-" I start defend Liam as best I can again but he hold up his hand.

"I was afraid that I would lose all of this," he pleads to his best friends. "I didn't want to see my daughter and the Sandovals less. I was afraid and I made the wrong choice, maybe. But you have to understand that I didn't mean to do so..."

"Oh my god are you as gone as she is as well?" Louis grumbles under his breath, making me turn to him, eyes wide. What did he just say?



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