Remember When ↠ l.p.

In a week

Louis comes over for dinner every night that week, Antonio joining him only a few times. I don't know what keeps him busy in the morning, but I assume he has plenty to do. Along with managing his record label he often participates in charities and is still a large part of the Donny Rovers team despite living in London. I imagine I could probably discover what sorts of things he's been doing while he's here in LA, there are still update accounts that are active, even if there is less news to share nowadays. I respect his privacy though and refrain from taking a look online. I would feel weird knowing where he went that day when he would come for dinner. He doesn't seem to want to discuss it, so we don't. We also haven't discussed my past or anything regarding my depression, which is something that I'm thankful for. Sure I trust him and love. The whole fandom practically worshipped them all at varying points of time. But while I've "know" Louis for years of my life, it wasn't as a friend who I can physically touch and watch react to things I say. I feel if I were to bare all so soon, I would be moving too quickly. So instead we talk about Liam. We read over Colin's progress reports together and show Cailyn pictures he has taken with Tessie to send to us. Cailyn, for her part, seems to understand that Tessie won't be coming back over for a while and that for now, pictures and the occasional video clip will have to be enough. Sometimes she will pout over it, especially when I'm too busy to play with her. I've offered to take her on play dates or to more library programs to find friends, but I've not said anything about daycare because honestly we don't need it and it'd be a waste of money...money I don't have right now. I've tried to find some work, but there's not much that I can find with the specifications that I have. For now, we can keep the apartment. If I don't find work soon, I know we'll have to move though. I know that I could probably ask Louis for help, I'm sure he knows people who know people, but I won't. I'm sure he wouldn't think anything of it or think I was out of line...but to me-whether it's pride or something else-it feels wrong. So I don't ask and I'll keep searching for articles needing to be written or some sort of secretary-like job that I can do from home. On a more positive note, my mom and I have been having Skype sessions where we discuss things. It's really been a huge help, I'm able to bluntly say anything and get things off my chest without worry. Because she knows it all, or most of it, let's be honest there are still a few lines I'm not crossing. Especially the ones involving the more intimate details of my relationship with Cailyn's father. Mom mentioned something the other day in fact, wondering how I would have fared if I hadn't gotten pregnant. I was disturbed by what could have been so much that she spent the rest of our chat soothing me. When I found I was pregnant and nothing seemed to be changing, it was almost getting worse if Im honest, that's what really pushed. That's what made me stronger and have enough determination to clear our lives of him forever. After I finished with mother, I went and played with Cailyn for three hours straight. I left all my worries behind me and just lost myself in enjoying her company. She's my best friend right now, even though she's over twenty years younger than me. That night Louis came over, our routine well settled into by then, and he had some interesting news. He'd raised his eyebrow at the dinner, (I'd attempted Chinese and while it didn't taste bad, the visual appeal was nonexistent. Let's just say there were brown edges to the broccoli and leave it at that) but sat and dug into his meal. A few minutes later he'd gotten through half of what was on his plate and addressed us.

"Colin has made some incredible progress." he pauses to make sure I'm paying attention. I nod for him to continue over a mouthful of rice. "Colin says he's completed his assessment and thinks it should be grounds enough to get you custody of Tessie."