I sit bolt upright, shaken and unsure of what's happened. As sweat beads roll down my neck and back, I think over the last thing I can remember. I had put the girls to bed and planned to come to read on the couch for a little while before going to bed myself. I glance around the dimly lit room as I begin to become more aware and awake. Was it a dream? It felt so real... My head starts aching as I gingerly lift myself off the couch. I shuffle into the kitchen for a glass of water and some pain medicine for the dull throbbing.
I yawn and lean against the counter, not bothering to turn on the lights in the kitchen since the lamp that is on in the living room leaks in and provides enough light for me to just make out where everything is. I swallow the pill quickly, with just one gulp of water. I swirl the water around in the glass and watch as it laps closer and closer to the edge with each flick of my wrist.
I knew it. I knew that neither of us where ready for a relationship and the fact that I had some sort of nightmare about how awkward it would be proves my point. Things are getting too close to the line I've said I won't cross. I deicide, there in the mostly dark kitchen, that I will make an effort to keep my distance from Liam. It will be hard, I'm so involved in his rehab and helping him to get back into his old life. I just hope that if I make a point of keeping my physical distance and being overly formal it will even out how much time I spend with him.
I feel the medicine starting to reduce my headache as I go through my bedtime routine, brushing my teeth and putting my hair into a loose braid. I collapse into the bed, glancing at my phone to see that it is half past two in the morning. I frown and yawn. Even though I got up and felt awake, I'm more sleepy than awake now. Which is good, normally I would stay up half the night worrying about that dream. But I've already made the decision to keep my distance from Liam from now on. That decision being made I feel much more peaceful. Peaceful enough to drift to sleep quickly and quietly...