The Stranger / Chris Evans x OC

Chapter 168: Intoxicated

AMELIA

Once I return to my seat after my encounter in the bathroom, it feels like the rest of the show goes by in a blur. I remember to clap and smile when Taylor goes up to present the award, and I remember to tell him how proud of him I am. Because I truly, truly am. And I know I'm supposed to be present in the moment right now, I know I'm supposed to be there for him in every sense of what's happening right now. 

But the only thing I can think about is what Cara told me in the bathroom. 

Her words rattle in my mind, they are ringing in my ears, for the rest of the time watching the award show. I know Chris is in the large room with me as I sit there, staring straight ahead, and I even feel his presence around me. But I don't dare look. 

I'm too big of a coward to look. 

Because what would I even do? I can't speak to him, not here, not now; I can't tell him everything that's been going on inside my mind since the day we became untethered. Since the day we were torn apart. 

So I pretend to ignore it. I pretend to be fine. I pretend to watch everything going on ahead of me, I pretend that my mind isn't stuck in the past, watching my most cherished memories on repeat. 

✦✧✦✧

Once the show ends, Taylor guides me to a smaller venue close by, quickly explaining to me that it's for the afterparty. I down another glass of wine once we're there. 

I haven't spotted Chris in a while, I've been doing my best to ignore the fact that he's here, to ignore the fact that the missing part of my heart is here somewhere, as I try to focus on my best friend instead. 

We have drinks, we talk, I congratulate him on how well he did. And yet none of it feels sincere. Because we both know who is truly on my mind. 

"Just go talk to him," Taylor eventually sighs before he takes another sip of his drink, "Stop pretending you don't want to. I can see it written on your face. You're thinking about him." 

I told Taylor about my encounter with Cara earlier. His expression changed, although I didn't quite understand what it meant, but it made him change his mind from earlier where he wanted to punch Chris in the face. 

I shake my head vehemently, "No T, this is about you. It's not about me, or him, it's about you, and your accomplishment. Finally getting just a smidge of the recognition you deserve." 

I smile at him genuinely, because I truly do mean the words I say, but he shakes his head with a smile. 

"Ames." 

His tone is serious, and so is the look on his face. 

"What will it take for you to talk to him? To hear him out? I know you better than anyone. I know you're not okay, I know you haven't been for a while now, and I also know that the only thing that could possibly fix it is talking to him. Just go talk to him."

I shake my head again, "I can't leave you." 

Taylor chuckles, "Yes you can. I'm in Los Angeles, living high on the attention. I'll find someone to talk to. Don't worry about me."

Then he cups my face in his hands before he looks me square in the face and says, "Go talk to him. Do what you need to do." 

I let out a deep sigh, cupping his hand on my cheek with a small smile, "You're the greatest friend in the world, you know that?"

He chuckles, and then he pinches my cheeks, making me giggle as he says, "Yes, I do. And so are you. Thank you for coming here to support me."

I smile up at him, about to respond before he interjects, "Now go find him."