Miss Independent

47

Alexis Pov

"Hey babe." I say as I kiss Kobe on the cheek. "I missed you." He says as he leads me into his hotel room. "I missed you too last week." I say. "You look good." He says as he kisses my neck. Then one thing lead to another and I was naked in his bed trying to catch my breath.

Anyways how I ended up with Kobe? Well he came to see my dad one day and he saw me and my dad explained what happened so we started talking and for a month he would text me and he's separated from his wife. We kind of grew into a relationship after I ended things with Odell. It's crazy I know but this was more because I was craving a more mature figure who had it all together. I'm not ready for Odell I don't even remember him so I can't show the same love back. With Kobe however it's just a fun thing and I can get things done even though he's like my boyfriend.

He's flown in a couple of times to see me and this is the first and last time we've been intimate. It was a interesting experience but for some reason I knew that this wasn't something I wanted to continue to do in the long run. I didn't have real feelings for him and I think this relationship kind of made me realize that I really liked Odell.

My dad didn't approve of me being with Kobe anyways so I kept it on the low. It was fun for both me and Kobe. He was really sweet, he listened to me and even helped me get something's in my life together after my accident. I however didn't go to hard for the relationship because I didn't want everything that came with it, I didn't want to be a step mom to kids that are almost teens, it was pretty scary honestly.

He didn't pressure me into anything because I was so young but he did help me realize I had some feelings deep down for Odell, maybe it's my subconscious telling me that I want him but I don't know. I just know that I didn't want Kobe as a boyfriend and I didn't see a future for us in the long run. It was pretty good though since we were able to keep it on the low for the most part. My dad whosever was estatic when I told him I'm not seeing Kobe anymore.

I kept in touch with him for a month or two after we stopped the relationship or dating as I would call it. He was a great friend to me through the time and he was so understanding when I ended things that I wish I could have feelings for him, because how much of a great guy he was, but my mind was somewhere else.

Every time Odell would message me to check up on me I felt my heart race and I remembered how much I liked him. I couldn't just run back to him though, my whole point of ending our relationship was so I could get my things together, I didn't want to be distracted so I spent some time on working on myself. I slowly eased my way towards him though, but I was scared of a sudden move because he could end up saying no and not wanting me.

I know he's probably suffering for it because I know how much he likes me or the me that he met but I couldn't bring myself to him just yet. It took me almost 2 months to work up the courage to message Odell first.

I even invited him to my 23rd birthday dinner which was mostly Aaleeyah's idea but it was an awkward silence, I kept trying to avoid his gaze but his eyes were pleading for me.

I was able to make it a week without talking to him and then something in my subconscious snapped and for some reason I wanted Odell more than anything. I don't know why, I've only known him for a few months, because I don't remember him from before the accident but hes been on my mind a lot lately and I can't concentrate on the things I claim that I need to straighten out before I get back with him.

I don't know if he even wants me back or if he moved on to something else after I decided to end things with him. I mean I had to because I felt like I couldn't give him the person he wanted because that just wasn't who I am now, I don't know about our relationship before but it's been a while now and I guess new memories are forming.

I some how managed to call Odell and I nervously waited for the rings. I didn't want him to ignore me and I didn't know what I would say if he answered and unfortunately, or maybe fortunately he answered my call.

I panicked and I pretended I was out drunk with Aaleeyah and I didn't want to go home and I didn't know what to do so he'd be more willing to let me come over. It worked in my favor and he agreed.

I quickly went to get dressed in some cute clothes and I went to make sure I looked good. I wasn't drunk at all, but I drank a glass of my mom's wine before I left the house. I know I should be gone out of their house by now but apartment hunting in New York is brutal. I finally found a place and the people in it won't leave until another couple months. My parents don't want me to leave either now that my sister Amiya left them and they have an empty house now, with me here they feel like parents against.

They don't really question me to much though, they just are happy I'm okay and working on myself but everyone has been acting really weird about Odell and I'm curious to know why. Maybe I'll get my answers eventually.

I run downstairs and I start my drive to Odell's apartment. I'm a nervous reck and I can't control the sweat that my palms are releasing. I've never been this worked up about a boy and it's kind of scary for me.