Forth Beam Short Stories

I want you (part 4)

Beam's P.O.V.

Over the past few weeks I've been hanging out a lot with Forth and his gang. It was a common now to see them at the medical food court to eat with us. Our table was always loud with Kit fighting with Park and poor Ming trying to diffuse the situation. Lam always liked to tease Wayo and Pha was always defending him too. It was really fun having them around our group became more lively.

But there was still something I couldn't get out of my mind. Forth and I have been hanging too obviously and even the both of us alone. We flirt a lot and everything but I still wasn't clear about his feelings for me. I mean I kept thinking that he wouldn't flirt with me otherwise because he knows I have feelings for him. But what if he just consider it as us being friendly. I don't know I'm really confused now. All day I've been in a bad mood and was barely even responding to him. It was now lunch time and Ming just arrived with Wayo.

"It's Forth and his gang coming today?" Kit asked me. I look up to him.

"I don't know." I said playing with my food.

They all looked at me concerned but I just ignored them. I felt Pha who was sitting beside me poke me with his elbow. I look at him and he was pointing straight ahead. I turn my head to look and saw Forth walking towards us with Lam and Park. I sighed and focused on my food again. I feel someone sit and I knew it was Forth he always sits beside me. Suddenly he snatched my chopsticks and stole my food.

"Hey!" I said glaring at him and he just smiled.

"Why are you ignoring me?" He asked.

"I am not, I was just focused on eating." I replied.

"Yeah? You sure about that? Because I haven't seen you taking a bite." He said grabbing the plate from me. "Now come on say ah." He said turning to me to feed me. I hesitated for a bit but he gave me a stern look and pushed the food closer to my mouth. I gave in and opened my mouth allowing him to feed me. He continued feeding me and he was also eating himself. Everyone seemed shocked that we were sharing the food but I didn't care and he doesn't either so I see no problem. I was still in a bad mood though this didn't change anything.

"Why are you still sulking." Said Forth putting a hand on my shoulder and looking at me concerned.

"I'm just in a bad mood that's all."

"Well do you want to hang out after class? Just the two of us? We could do something fun." He said ruffling my hair and then he smiled at me.

I badly wanted to say yes. But I've been thinking all day that we need to clear our feelings since I am falling more and more in love with him and I don't know where he stands. So I decided to give him some space for him to able to decide what he wants.

"I can't, I'm going to my mothers house today after class and I'll be there all weekend." I replied and was actually surprised that he looked kind of sad.

"Oh ok then." He said sadly. Just then I noticed everyone at the table was quietly looking at us.

"What?" I asked confused.

"Nothing." Said Kit and the rest of them looked away and started talking again.

The rest of the lunch you could sense the tension in the air. Luckily for us they were only fifteen minutes left of lunch. Soon it was time for the engineering guys to go. They bid their goodbyes and left quickly. Ming and Wayo also said goodbye to their boyfriends and left leaving us three alone again.

"What is wrong with you?" Said Pha once everyone was out of sight.

"What do you mean?" I said feigning ignorance.

"Oh don't even start with your games mister. We both know you and even though you love her you barely visit your mother because she's always busy. She never spends the whole weekend with you unless it's a special occasion." Said Kit not having any of my bullshit. I sighed.

"You're right, it's just that I am scared guys. I think I may already be in love with him and I don't even know if he has any kind of romantic feelings for me. That scares the shit out of me you know?"

"So what? you're just going to distance yourself from him after you both got so close? It's not fair you should at least talk to him." Said Pha.

"I wasn't planning on leaving him abruptly. I will just distance myself for the weekend let him sort out his feelings see if he at least misses me. Then I'll confess to him on Monday again and I don't know well see where we go from there on. But one thing I'm sure of I can't keep up with this you know? It's been almost a month since I confessed my feelings for him. We are constantly flirting with each other and he doesn't reject me when I hug him randomly, cuddle him or put my head on his shoulder. But that isn't concrete prove that he has feelings for me too. We haven't kissed or anything and I can't take this anymore. I need to know where I stand so I can be able to move on or I don't know." I said letting all my feelings out. It was like a weight had been lifted of my shoulders. Pha and Kit looked at me concerned.

"Wow Beam I didn't realize that you liked him that much. But don't worry how could he not like you. You are Beam Baramee if anyone can win his heart is you." Said Kit smiling at me reassuringly.

"I hope you're right." I said.

After class finished I went straight to my dorm room. I planned on spending my weekend here studying for the upcoming exams. So I started right away to get my mind off Forth. This didn't last for long and my mind drifted towards him again. I'm worried that we have become friends. It makes things harder for me because I question everything. But he knows I clearly have feelings for him and he still flirts back so I'm hoping for the best. Since I've been finding ways to spend time with Forth everyday it feels weird not having him close. But this is for the best I hope. 

I was contemplating going to the bar to get my mind of things. It was Friday and I deserved to have a little bit of fun no? Besides I can't even remember the last time I went to a bar. If I really think about I've been busy hanging out with Forth. So the last time I went was on the day I decided that I wanted Forth as my boyfriend. It's been way to long so I decided to go for a bit. I'll just have a couple of beers and enjoy the night before I come back. I invited Pha and Kit and they agreed to come with me.

I immediately started getting ready since it was already late when I made up my mind. An hour later I was arriving at the bar with Kit, Pha was outside waiting for us. We got in and I went straight to the bar to order some shots and drinks for all of us. After we found a table and today girls seemed to be approaching me faster than ever. I declined them all because even though Forth and weren't even officially dating I wasn't interested in anybody else but him.

I was looking around and almost choked when I saw Forth and his gang on a table in the corner. They were as loud as always so I was surprised I hadn't notice their presence. After lunch I hadn't talk with him much. He had sent me a couple of messages but I wasn't replying fast as usual. I looked at my phone and noticed that he has sent me a message a couple of hours ago and I hadn't replied yet. I was about to do so when I heard Kit gasp. I looked at him.

"What happened?" I asked.

"Nothing." He said looking nervous. I looked at Pha who had a concerned look on his face.

"I think we should go somewhere else I'm not liking this bar." Said Pha.

I looked at them confused and realize they must have seen Forth too.

"If it's about Forth I saw him too." I said looking towards where he was and what I saw absolutely broke my heart. A cute boy had just approached Forth and was basically sitting on his lap. He was obviously flirting and touching his arm and Forth was just letting him. I felt my hands shaking I was so freaking mad. Suddenly Forth hugged the boy closer and I felt my heart breaking the pain on my chest was unbearable. I felt tears threatening to fall from my eyes but I couldn't look away. Suddenly Pha stood in front of me blocking my view.

"Let's get out of here now." He said sounding mad. Both Kit and Pha dragged me away from there.

A.N.

Sorry I haven't been able to update. It wasn't my intention to bring angst into this one shot but oh well too late for that right? Let's see where this goes.