dear choi hyunsuk~ (2021)

feb 13th, 2021

2.13.21

hi, hyunsuk!

i'm feeling kind of sentimental today- it's funny how the setting of a letter can change the way i'm ready to express my emotions, but for some reason these days, i feel more comfortable in the setting of a daily letter to spill out my heart with all of the details about how you make my heart feel absolutely the warmest- and i mention this, just for the fact that i started the letter for our new milestone, next month. ^^ 850 is quite a long while, though i know most wouldn't consider it something to celebrate, but every day with you always feels like i'm in my own personal heaven, so of course i'm over joyed that we're close to reaching that point. there's so much i want to say, but i'm not sure all too well how to express it yet.. all i know is that i'm just really grateful to have gotten the opportunity to spend this much time with you, learning about you and seeing you grow. life is fragile and always uncertain, you never know how things will go or not and the uncertainty could really be something that puts me at unease if i think about it too long. but as long as i know you're there, it'll be fine. i know that with all the certainty- life can throw as many curveballs as it wants, because as long as you're there, i have the strength to handle anything at all. i feel really grateful to just spend every day as your fan

you make my life so bright~ filled with so much colour and vibrance, i never knew that life could be this beautiful until you came into it. you put all of the meaning that it has today- and there's just so much to think about. but, i guess i shouldn't be too scared about the future, because my life as it is has already changed a big deal, enough to make me notice, but i've never been scared. and yes.. it's because of you.. i know it might look weird, so i'm sorry if it makes you uncomfortable. but really, through every situation that's come at me, just watching you has always been enough to ease me through a bad time. sometimes when i'm crying, if i see you it'll help me instantaneously stop- it's almost like magic, because it works every time. i just truly think you're an angel since you have the effects of one, your smile alone fills the hearts of so many with glee and your talent is enough to inspire so many people around the world, just by being yourself, you're changing this world into a better place and i hope you know that~ you're really special!!! i just want you to know that in every sense, you're really amazing. i guess since i'm working on stuff for a milestone, i'm just here thinking about how glad I am to know you and just how sentimental im getting T.T

you know what i like thinking about, too? you've just come really far. the focus of a milestone, i tend to write them in appreciation for how you've helped me in reach and every single day, and that's why each day has importance, especially one to such a large extent as 600, 700, 800, etc. you know? but i also can't help but think about where you were, say, 800 days ago. that was the third week of ygtb airing- although i do think you said you filmed it in june? T.T i don't really know the timespan, but i know you were still in the midst of it by november, and i know it must have felt like a lot of stress for you- i don't bring it up to down the mood, but i just think it's so cool and amazing the way you've grown this much since then, not just in the accomplishments you've had, but your personality has changed a lot too, for the better. you're just a really soft and approachable person- you expect cool people like you with this charisma that overflows to be intimidating, but even though you have this cool swagger- you still seem really approachable, and always kind. you're humble, selfless, and always caring of those around you~ but also, you're just generally such a fun person ! i feel like it doesn't get talked about enough- you're one of the most entertaining people i know, and every treasure map episode, i feel like you're always in the highlight reel of best parts~ i just hope you know that, too !! a lot of people , and rightfully so, talk about stuff like how all rounded you are and how kind you are as a person, but i don't see enough people talk about how funny you can be, too !!

it must be really cool to be able to hang out with you every day. i can't even imagine- it just must be so fun :0 like for the one episode of tmap, i'd just kind of like to spend a day like you~ maybe one day? i'd be kind of lost for the stuff like soccer, man i wouldn't even know where to start- but i just naturally like the things you do. even if i'm not well acclimated into the topics, i just can simply enjoy them for the fact it makes you happy~ since on such a grand scale you make people unexplainably happy, you deserve the same happiness and honestly, even more so <<3 you deserve the whole world, i just wish i could give it to you T.T but for real, you're such a cool mix of a lot of different things i guess~? i can't think of people who are into the combinations of things you are, like fashion and soccer, plus making music/ literally being an idol— maybe there is people like that, but i don't know many. it's another aspect that makes you unique~~ there truly is so much to love about you :DD <33 i love every little trait of yours, it's just really cool to learn more stuff about you when i can get the chance~ i think you're so amazing in every aspect of life:D <3 thank you for inspiring me and making me happy on a daily basis, and for such a long time now~

to be entirely technical, it's been.. 807 days i think??? wow :0 it's already been a week since our 800?? huhuhu~ but i'm just glad 850 isn't far away- actually in fact, it's really close to the 1 year anniversary of when i played persona 5 royal for the first time :0 i think it was, 3.31 and our 850 is on the 28th, so 4 days apart- i was really excited about that !!! i'm not sure if persona is really something you'd like or not- but there is a scene in royal (in the original i think too???) it's really small, but it's just a scene during the characters' summer vacation where ryuji and the protagonist sit together to watch a soccer game heheh it makes me think of you every time i play it~ ! i wonder if you'd like it~ at least! there's actually a new persona coming out this month, it'd be cool if there was something in it you'd like~ but i'm off topic :DD i think i'll cut the letter for now, but not before i remind you what i always do !! pls take care of yourself well, okay?~ eat when you're hungry~ pls don't skip anything !!! and rest when you're able, even if it's just for a little~ i dunno what you're up to, but knowing you, i'm sure you've got yourself preoccupied in stuff :D which i understand totally !! i'm always doing something heheh which is why i support you, just don't forget rest!!! but also don't forget that teumes have your back, so don't forget to rely on us if you need to when you're having a hard time, okay? i mean, i hope you're well. but if you're having a day when you feel bad, that's normal too~ just lean on us like we lean on you, okay? we always got you <3 don't forget that!!

you always have tons of people rooting for you, supporting you, cheering you on every moment they can, giving you all the love in their heart, and doing it because they genuinely care about you so largely ! don't forget that, alright? i know sometimes things can feel overwhelming or hard, but no matter what, you have lots of people here for you. and no matter what, i'll always be one of them~ you helped me through my hard times, and i'll always be here for yours~ for the good and the bad, i'm always going to be a fan who cheers you <3 sorry to get so sappy~ i just want you to know that even if i'm annoying and selfish, write bad letters or seem weird, it's just my way of showing the big amounts of love i have for you. whether i express it properly or not, just know it's there~ and it always will be !! but what i was wanting to get at, is just that i hope you have a great day~ stay happy and healthy!!! i'll see you tomorrow~~

i love you with my whole heart~
always and forever
<3 <3 <3