dear choi hyunsuk~ (2021)

jan 22nd, 2021

1.22.21

hi hyunsuk! :D

i hope you're having a good day~~ honestly i'm still in a really good mood from treasure map~! i knew that it'd have a long lasting happy effect, but i had no clue that it'd be this long-lasting :3 i've watched the episode a lot of times by now- and honestly, you might think that it's repetitive to do so but i just can't tire of the moments where i get to see you- honestly, i think this holds true for any of the times i get to see you. most people would get tired of watching the same things over and over- and in most cases, myself included. but when it's in regards to you, i can't help but feel this plethora of love enter my heart and give it's full focus to you and to you only :D to watch you have fun and really enjoy yourself just means true happiness to my heart, and that's why all of those moments with you feel really sacred~ more so than i can explain, you know? hehe but i think this episode from last night be one of the most fun treasure map episodes ever~ it makes me wonder if a lot of the episodes in this season will be similar ^^ and if so, it makes me think that this truly will be something legendary :D i mean, every episode already has been quite legendary in it's own way respectively, but i think this has just a whole new aura :DD i think it's kind of random to bring up but i really liked the part in the episode where jihoon was 'looking' in your hat for  a coin but there really wasn't anything- but you played along and smiled at the camera and gosh, it really does make my heart flutter so much :DD

no matter what i did throughout the day- because, don't worry, i didn't obsessively replay it all day :D i did watch it a lot, but not like to a weird extent, i just enjoyed it a few more extra times than i would have with other stuff :D but when i went to stream you guys' music video, or when i was playing persona or just on the treadmill or sitting in my room reading my book- my mind always drifted back to you, and it kept thinking about the episode and all of the fun you were having :DD honestly, yesterday was so reminiscent of some of the days with you that i hold fondest in my memories and closest in my heart and it almost feels unbelievable that i got to experience it with you again- but i'm glad, it's something i won't take for granted. who knows what the future holds, but no matter what happens i just want you to know that i'm grateful for all of the moments i get to spend with you :D also that i'm working hard for you!! you know i do videos right, on youtube? well! all of us 'teutubers' kind of are doing a thing today called teutubers assemble and it's just trying to encourage people to stream the my treasure mv!! and of course voting on stuff where we need to~ i promise that we're working really hard for you! i've been streaming all day, personally :< while i was editing, working out, reading, playing persona, all of that stuff!!! i just want to make sure i'm doing the best i can :DD

it's always inspiring to me to work hard when i think of all of the things you must be doing- you work so hard and for so long throughout the day, i don't know what it's like but i imagine it's hard to get a lot of time to relax <: you have no choice but to keep working, but you do it with a good attitude~ so it inspires me to do the same thing with whatever i'm doing!! but ahhh don't you guys have another fansign soon? i'm pretty excited, i know you look so happy during those and that's all i could ever want, you know~ i just want you to be happy, to be well. like everyone else, i think happiness and health are some of the most important things in life and since you're my favourite person in the whole world, it's most important to me that you're at your best :( i'm not even gonna lie, this time of the month is hard for me,, so i think it really was a blessing that treasure map had aligned like this. it's around this time in the month we lost hana,, and i dunno- my unsettled feelings seem to linger on more days longer than the actual day itself :[ i dunno- it's just difficult on me sometimes :p but i hope you're well! all i want is just for you to be happy :D please take care of your health, alright ? enjoy all of the food in your fancy building, rest when you can and remember you're loved by so many people~~~ and i'll always, always be one of them!! remember that <3 and have a great day!!

i love you <3