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Spending the night with someone for the first time was always a nerve wracking thought for me. When Sidney asked me to stay the night with him I battled in my head for a quick minute before agreeing.
I stood washing the dishes as he went to the bathroom and to grab me some clothes of his I would be comfortable in when I felt arms wrap around my middle from behind. I gasped a little and turned my head to have a kiss planted straight on my mouth, completely catching me off guard.
"What are you doing?" I smiled at Sidney as he gripped me tighter.
"What are you doing?" He looked over my shoulder.
"Our dishes from dinner" I giggled as he tried to pull me away.
"Stop, you don't have to do dishes" he spun me around and wrapped me in his arms.
"But I-" I started before he cut me off.
"Shhh" he reached behind me and turned the water off. "Just come to bed with me, sweetheart"
"I'm washing them in the morning then" I giggled finally wrapping my arms around him.
He smiled at me, not saying a word only displaying a look I couldn't place. It wasn't a bad look, it was a sweet look. One that made me feel loved, but one that I was still unable to completely place.
"What's that look for?" I breathed a laugh bringing my hands to rest on his shoulders.
"I just" he started before pausing to take a breath that came out more as a chuckle. "I just was beginning to think I would never be able to say that"
"Come on, let's go to bed" I took him by the hands and tugged him towards his bedroom.
"I found these for you, I hope they work well enough" he explained handing out a pair of sweatpants and one of his shirts.
"They're perfect" I offered him a smile while gently taking the clothing from his hand.
I slowly changed into the clothing making sure to tie the sweatpants extra tight so they wouldn't fall off. I noticed Sidney watching me intently as I carefully changed.
"What?" I giggled again.
"Nothing" he smiled making his way to me. "How do they feel?" He ran his hands down my arms to take my hands in his.
"They're perfect" I smiled lacing my fingers with his.
"What's wrong?" He looked at me concerned.
"Nothing, what do you mean?" I asked him confused.
"Relax baby" he pulled me to him by my hands and took my face in his hands. "I can tell you're tense. You have nothing to worry about"
"I'm sorry, this is a big thing for me" I confessed trying to pull my eyes from his.
"Hey" he brought my attention back to him. "If you're not ready we-"
"No I am, I guess I'm just overthinking it" I cut him off.
"You'll be just fine, I'll be holding you all night" he smiled bringing my face to his for a soft kiss.
His words brought a smile to my face.
"I wouldn't have it any other way" I gave him a slight squeeze before he moved to the bed pulling me with him.
As we settled in bed a sense of peacefulness finally overcame me. His arms strongly around me relaxed me and brought about a realization, this is where I was supposed to be...where I was meant to be.
He fell asleep before I did. I wanted to enjoy the feeling of relaxing in his arms, even if I was exhausted. I had completely forgotten why I was so nervous to take this step.
When I woke up I was still firmly being held in his arms. A smile hit my face before I even opened my eyes.
I turned over in bed to face Sidney and kissed his lips quickly.
"Good morning" I smiled.
"Morning" he grinned at me, giving me a look I, once again, couldn't fully place. "What?" I giggled.
"Nothing, just" he paused to run a hand along my cheek. "I could get used to this"
"Me too" I confessed resting my arms around his middle.
