Our Time (BILLIE EILISH)

- O n e h u n d r e d & f i v e -

Nicole: "There's something I have to tell you though."

Maddie: "Okay?"

Nicole: "I'm not trying to get in-between you and Billie, you can say that you and Billie aren't going to get back together. The answer is that you are, and I wanna be the last person that comes in between that. I really hate the fact that I built you into the person that you are, if I never fucked you up so bad. You wouldn't be this hurt over Billie lying. Shit she didn't even lie that bad, she told the truth. Nothing happened from what she said, it's not like they kissed she didn't cheat or anything. In my opinion."

Maddie: "Nicole, she had the temptation to. Temptation, she wanted to."

Nicole: "But she didn't! Clearly you have enough power over to make her resist, you have no clue how hard is to resist that. I've seen Kylie, she's bad dude. But you're badder and better than her."

Maddie: "How do you know Kylie?"

Nicole: "She lives in the house next to me."

Maddie: "Of course she does." I ran my hands through my hair.

Nicole: "Billie cares about you, that's all I can say."

Maddie: "I know."

Nicole: "Then why are you still mad?"

Maddie: "Because I'm scared that if I'm not mad for long enough she won't get the point, but if mad for too long she'll find someone else."

Nicole: "Maddie, anyone that moves on from you is stupid as hell. I'm not saying that as your ex, I'm saying that as a person that has observed you. Billie wouldn't move on, or move on that fast."

I sat there not knowing what do with myself, Nicole then laced our hands together giving my hand a squeeze. Then I hear a bunch of camera clicks.

Click click click click click.

Here we go again, now I'm really bout to hated by her fandom.

Maddie: "I wanna go home."

Nicole: "Okay I'll take you."

Maddie: "Thank you."

I walk to the car with my head, avoiding the paparazzi. I don't wanna film when I go home, but like I can't miss another week.

We drove in silence until we got to my apartment.

Nicole: "Call me if you need anything." She squeezed my hand.

I nodded and got out of the car, and I walked to my door and unlocked it. I turned on the main light, I walked upstairs and changed into Billie's hoodie. But we're not going to talk about it, I put my hair in a messy bun and I walked back downstairs. I pulled out my camera and pressed record.

"Hey thots. This video wasn't planned but I need to talk to you guys because I feel like I haven't been honest with you for the last month and half and I hate that. So let me tell you why I'm not having a good time recently."

"So for the last month and a half, I've been working my ass off for something that I wanted. But now something happened to where I'm not even gonna do what I want to do."

"Half the world thinks that I'm going back out with Nicole, when really that's not the case. Even though the pictures that are going to surface are gonna say something else. You heard it from me, that Nicole and I aren't together."

"This month of August was supposed to be easy and fun, but now everyday there is something happening whether business or just hanging out with friends. I don't remember the last time I looked forward to a day."

My phone dinged, all I saw was "Babygirl❤️" I played it off as nothing happened.

I continued to talk about everything that was going on, I talked about everything. I talked about Billie but I didn't confirm anything.

After I was done filming, I texted Billie back. It seemed mean. But it wasn't, but I can't break down to her. I was sitting on the couch editing the video so I could upload it on Monday, then this wave came over me. I really wanted to talk to Billie.

I stared at her contact debating whether or not I should press the call button, I could deal with talking to her. But seeing her in person. Yeah I could not do that.

I pushed the call button, I let out a deep breath has I heard each ring.

Billie: "Hello?"

Maddie: "... Hey."

Billie: "Why... not to be a bitch or anything. But why'd you call?"

Maddie: "Because I was a bitch over text, I didn't mean to be but it was nothing but the truth."

Billie: "So, you really did wanna talk to me?"

Maddie: "Yes and no."

Billie: "Oh."

Maddie: "No, I wanna talk to you because I miss hearing your voice and I miss hearing what you have to say. But I didn't wanna talk to you because I'm still hurt."

Billie: "Short- Maddie, I know I hurt you. I really know that whether you believe it or not, I hate myself everyday for it. I don't know, I really don't. I don't know what came over me. I don't know what to do either because I know how you think, I know I affected you forever."

Maddie: "I don't know either because like I still..."

Billie: "You still what?"

Maddie: "Like I still wanna be with you, but I don't wanna jump right back into what we had because. I know you don't understand me, but like that hurt... a lot. But I don't wanna start over because I really liked where we were."

Billie: "Maddie, I know this is hard for you, I know I fucked up. I understand what you're talking about. You liked where we were, I did too. But you don't wanna jump back into where we were, because you're scared that I'mma hurt you again. But I'm going to do everything in my power to make sure that I don't hurt you ever again because that was my biggest mistake."

There was a moment of silence, because she was right. Every word she said, I agreed with.

Maddie: "How is it, that you can tell me how I feel when I don't even know how I feel?"

Billie: "It's a secret."

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like i said, we're getting somewhere.

thanks ily

words: 1061.