Bucky Barnes One Shots - EDITING

84. Sleep

~100k

Poor Bucky omg bby no I'm sorry I wrote you like this lmao

Also, the title reminded me of Green Goblin's "Sleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeep"

Word Count: 1400

The two of you were in your shared room in the tower, but doing completely different things

oH mY gOd, ThEy WeRe RoOmMaTeS

Bucky was sat at one of the desks, scribbling something random on a piece of paper, and you were laying in bed, watching him move the pencil around

"What are you doing?" You decided to ask after 20 minutes

He just shrugged and held up the paper, showing you his drawing of a cute little duck riding a skateboard whilst playing the trumpet

You sat up and swung your legs over the side of the bed, standing up and walking to him, making him also stand

"Wow" you laughed "You should be an artist"

You wrapped your arms around his waist and hugged him to you "Come on, Picasso, it's 2 in the morning. You must be tired"

He sighed and said "I'm exhausted"

This made you look back up to his face with a smile "Come to bed then, Mr. Artsy"

But, his response confused and surprised you - it was another sigh, a shake of his head, and a simple "No"

"Huh?" You said, caught off guard by his reply

"What's the point?" he asked in defeat, tilting his head to the side, trying to find the answer in your eyes

But, you didn't have the answer, as his question only confused you further, making you ask "What do you mean?

He looked down and removed himself from your arms, sitting down on the edge of the bed

"I can't go to sleep" he said simply, making you furrow your eyebrows and sit on the bed beside him, causing him to swivel all the way round so he was facing you

"Care to elaborate?" You asked, looking at him reassuringly, but not receiving a smile from him as he nodded hesitantly before explaining

"It's like my body and mind have forgotten how to - I'm constantly on edge and I don't know how to relax. And you- you amazing, beautiful woman that I love so much- can't even put my mind at rest anymore. I don't know why it's like this, but I've been so ruined and broken that I can't even go to fucking sleep. Y/N, I'm sorry, but I can't hold you in bed anymore. Trust me, I want to, I really do, but I just...I- I can't, Y/N, and I don't know what to do. Every few nights, I think I only get like 20 minutes of sleep, but it's never anything over that. No one will help me because I'm a fucking murderer, and every time I try to sleep, I just lay there with you in my arms. You look so peaceful and adorable when you sleep, I'm happy that you aren't having this problem and that it's me instead, but I wish that I could know what it feels like to properly sleep again"

When he finished speaking, he looked so vulnerable and desperate for help that you wanted to cuddle him forever

When you didn't reply, he leaned forward and connected his forehead to yours, putting his hand on your cheek and closing his eyes before speaking againd

"I'm so fucking tired, but I just can't sleep. Please help me, Y/N. I don't know what to do"

His voice shook and his metal hand played with the hem of his shirt

"Have you spoken to Bruce about this?" You asked after a while of hearing him trying to control his breathing, but, to your surprise, he nodded his head "He said that he didn't know of anything strong enough for me to take to send me to sleep"