sam pov
this whole past week i have not left my mother's side.
we went to an amusement park for the first time since...ever.
she never took me on roller coasters or anything like that.
but it was amazing.
ezra and selena are flying up today with the kids and my mom's kids.
once i see ezra i swear to fucking god that i will murder him with my own bare hands.
"hey hey heyyy." karlie came in the hotel room and i groaned.
she gasped, "sam. i am almost hurt by that."
i chuckled and threw my grapes at her, "leave! be gone satan!"
mom walked in, "satan? really?"
i shrugged and mom chuckled, "hey karls. why are you in georgia? i thought you were staying back in new york?"
"i was but how could i resist my t-swizzle? and my sammy sosa!" karlie ran over and jumped on me and i screeched, "HIPPO! HIPPO! GET HER OFF!"
mom laughed and karlie started tickling me, "stop! k-karlie! i c-can't b-breathe!" i said and laughed loudly and the door opened, "heyy." mom said.
karlie stopped and i looked up and saw selena staring at karlie and i, eyebrow raised in the air.
i chuckled and shoved karlie off of me, making her squeal and fall off the bed.
i snorted and laughed at her, "idiot."
i walked over to selena and kissed her sweetly.
"what was that huh?"
i laughed, "aunt karlie being a hippo."
"oh yeah?" she said and i rolled my eyes, "is someone jealous?"
"what? no."
i smiled, "selena. she's my aunt hon."
"and i was your aunt. hon."
i laughed and saw the strollers.
"and how are my little angels?" i said and smiled.
"mama!" alison cheered and i smiled, "hi guys. how are my favorite twins doing?!" i said and picked up brantley and alison.
"hey guys." ezra said and my little sister and brother sprinted into the room, "JEREMY I TAGGED YOU!" amanda shrieked.
"no!"
"yes!"
"no!" he argued and i put the twins down, "can you take them to the couch." i said and selena nodded.
mom ran over, "ezzy!" she hugged him and he kissed her cheek.
"hey beautiful."
i glared at him, arms folded.
"hi dad." i said bitterly and he gulped and looked away.
"hi mommy!" amanda and jer said and hugged mom and ran to karlie.
"dad...can we talk?" i said coldly and he slowly nodded, "s-sure."
i grabbed his arm tightly and yanked him into a different room.
i locked the door and punched him across the face, "how could you fucking do this huh?" i hissed and he held his cheek.
"what kind of a sick, twisted person would do something like that? huh? tell me! let me know ezra!" i shouted and threw him to the ground and he scampered to his feet.
"look sam. it's not what you think. taylor and i haven't done anything in the past year or two. i have needs okay?"
i felt my eye twitch.
"how long has this been going on huh?"
he looked away and i grunted, gripping his shirt and pinning him to the wall, "HOW. long." i hissed and he held his arms up, "a little over a year." he said.
i clenched my teeth tightly and grunted, punching him in the face again.
he cried out, "Stop! sam please."
i let him fall to the ground, "you better tell my mother because i do not want her near a sick, fucked up dog anymore." i spit at him and opened the door.
he slowly walked out and said, "t-taylor."
"yeah babe?" she asked, turning around.
"what happened to your cheek?" she asked and ran over, viewing the red marks.
he looked at me and i shook my head.
"i-i need to tell you something."
"okay? what's on your mind?" she asked, clearly confused and selena shot up and i nodded at her.
i folded my arms over my chest and waited for him to say it.
"taylor i-i love you. and i missed you." he said and smiled.
i closed my eyes and felt an over raging rage.
i grunted and shoved him against the wall, breaking his kiss from my mother.
"SAM!" mom shouted and tried to get me off.
"YOU FUCKING LITTLE BITCH! YOU TELL HER RIGHT NOW!" i said and nailed him in the eye and mom shrieked out, "SAMANTHA ROSE WHAT HAS GOTTEN INTO YOU! ARE YOU ON DRUGS?!" she yanked me away from ezra and i screamed, "DON'T GO NEAR HIM MOM! HE HAS BEEN CHEATING ON YOU FOR OVER A YEAR!"
mom froze and so did karlie and everyone in the room.
she turned to a now black eyed ezra.
"is this...true?" she asked, on the verge of breaking.
my face was fumed up and i had my fists clenched.
"yes. her name is jackie."
mom brought her hand back and slapped him as hard as she could across his face and he closed his eyes, "taylor-"
"GET AWAY FROM ME! STAY AWAY!" she screamed and started crying.
i ran over and hugged her tightly and she sobbed into my chest.
he came over, "taylor please-"
"no! stay away from her." karlie said and moved ezra away.
"just go ezra. stay away from me and my siblings and stay the hell away from my mother. unless we want to have another of our own conversations again." i said and kissed my mom's head.
"where does that leave us?" he asked.
mom pulled away from me and i grabbed selena's hand, "i want a divorce. no conversation. i don't want to be with someone i can no longer trust or look at the same. i'll get the papers. now leave me alone." she said and went into her room, slamming the door.
"sam please you have to-"
"don't try to talk to me! i trusted you! i loved you! and you have the nerve to ruin all of that?! does me calling you dad mean NOTHING TO YOU?! AFTER EVERYTHING WE'VE BEEN THROUGH! I HATE YOU AND I NEVER WANT TO SEE YOUR FUCKING PUSSY FACE EVER AGAIN!" i screamed as i cried out tears.
"sam! sam that's enough." selena grabbed my hand and pulled me back.
karlie took ezra and made him leave, shutting the door.
i sobbed and collapsed into selena's arms.
"i t-trusted him."
"i know. sam i'm so sorry."
"sammy?" i turned to see amanda, crying.
"amanda...i'm so sorry you had to see that." i apologized.
she shook her head, "it's okay..."
i hugged her and jeremy did too.
i heard things shattering in the other room and i sighed, "stay here guys." i stood up and looked at karlie.
we walked to the door and i opened it to see mom freaking out.
she was sobbing and throwing things, breaking everything in sight,
"MOM STOP!" i shouted and she screamed, throwing a glass vase at us and karlie and i ducked, it smashing against the door.
karlie looked more than mortified.
i ran over, "MOM! MOM STOP!"
she screamed more and i grabbed her, hugging her to my chest and she fought to break free, "LET ME GO!"
i held her tighter, "mom stop please! this isn't you! please mom listen to me!"
"LET GO SAM!" she screamed out.
"taylor! taylor listen to me okay? this isn't you tay. it's okay. forget him! you have me! you have sam! selena! your kids! your grand kids! please taylor." karlie begged her.
mom didn't listen.
i pulled away and grabbed her face, "mom look at me. ezra is a douche and i know that. but he is not worth ruining your life. you are so amazing and beautiful ma and i know we can get through this. together remember? it's you and me mom. always and forever okay?" i said and kissed her hands.
she sniffled and looked into my eyes.
"promise me you'll never leave me." she whispered.
"i swear on my life that i will never leave you mom." i promised and she nodded, putting her head in the nape of my neck.
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"sam i can't do this. i can't go out there." mom said before i was about to go on for my opening set.
"mom listen to me. you can do this okay? forget about ezra okay? i'll be right back okay? i have to go now. i love you so much mama." i said and kissed her forehead.
i grabbed my guitar and walked out, everyone screaming and cheering.
"what's up atlanta?!" i shouted and everyone screamed.
"so...are you guys ready for taylor swift?!"
they screamed louder and i chuckled, "alright then. i'm going to start off with a song that was...a number one on the charts for a few weeks and also happens to be the name of my upcoming album, stitches so if you know it, sing along."
i started playing an acoustic version of stitches and when i finished i smiled, "oh and if you guys don't know me, hi, i'm sam swift. i am married with kids and people mistake me for justin bieber and for being a guy but...according to my body, i am a girl."
everyone screamed and even laughed.
"so my band seems about ready. this song is very close to me. people try to get to me and tear me down. they tell me rude things and say stuff on the internet and i do see it. they think i don't care but i am only human. i do get hurt. this song is called human."
when i sang human, the band in the back playing the music and i held the mic on the stand and sang from the pit of my heart.
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1 month later (5/25/2022) Arlington, Texas
2 AM
i heard the keyboard in the hotel room next door and i got up, walking into the room, using the spare key.
i listened in to the song she was singing.
"I walked through the door with you, the air was cold,
But something 'bout it felt like home somehow.
And I left my scarf there at your sister's house,
And you've still got it in your drawer even now.
Oh, your sweet disposition and my wide-eyed gaze.
We're singing in the car, getting lost Upstate.
Autumn leaves falling down like pieces into place,
And I can picture it after all these days.
And I know it's long gone,
And that magic's not here no more,
And I might be okay,
But I'm not fine at all.
'Cause there we are again on that little town street.
You almost ran the red 'cause you were looking over at me.
Wind in my hair, I was there, I remember it all too well."
i closed my eyes, listening to this heart filled song.
"mom." i squeaked out and she sniffled, turning her head to me.
"it hurts." she said and i nodded, walking over to her and sitting at the piano.
i put my arm around her and pulled her body into me.
she started crying again and i closed my eyes, "you'll get through this." i whispered to her and she nodded.
"he just...left after the divorce. he sent the papers back and left..."
last month after we gave ezra the papers, he sent them back after signing them and fled with jackie.
i don't know where the hell he is and he blocked all of our numbers and even left his own kids.
what kind of a sick asshole does that?
i thought he was fucking different.
ever since then she has been going on with the tour with us and i have been mostly spending my time with karlie and mom.
karlie hasn't left mom's side.
and she says it's no big deal but i know she skipped one of her fashion shows for my mother and that really meant a lot that she cares about my mother so much.
"want to sing that for me again?" i asked and she smiled, nodding.
she placed her fingers on the keys and i looked at her notebook she wrote the lyrics in.
"I walked through the door with you, the air was cold,
But something 'bout it felt like home somehow.
And I left my scarf there at your sister's house,
And you've still got it in your drawer even now.
Oh, your sweet disposition and my wide-eyed gaze.
We're singing in the car, getting lost Upstate.
Autumn leaves falling down like pieces into place,
And I can picture it after all these days.
And I know it's long gone,
And that magic's not here no more,
And I might be okay,
But I'm not fine at all.
'Cause there we are again on that little town street.
You almost ran the red 'cause you were looking over at me.
Wind in my hair, I was there, I remember it all too well.
Photo album on the counter, your cheeks were turning red.
You used to be a little kid with glasses in a twin sized bed
And your mother's telling stories about you on a tee ball team
You taught me 'bout your past, thinking your future was me.
i watched her facial expression and her eyes were closed, sometimes opening to look at the words.
And I know it's long gone
And there was nothing else I could do
And I forget about you long enough
To forget why I needed to...
'Cause there we are again in the middle of the night.
We're dancing around the kitchen in the refrigerator light
Down the stairs, I was there, I remember it all too well, yeah.
she played it now loud and slamming her hands on the keys and i saw tears cascade down my mother's cheeks.
Well, maybe we got lost in translation, maybe I asked for too much,
But maybe this thing was a masterpiece 'til you tore it all up.
Running scared, I was there, I remember it all too well.
Hey, you call me up again just to break me like a promise.
i teared up as her words hit me right in the heart.
i can't believe this is what he did to her.
my mother.
and he left. just like that.
So casually cruel in the name of being honest.
I'm a crumpled up piece of paper lying here
'Cause I remember it all, all, all... too well.
Time won't fly, it's like I'm paralyzed by it
I'd like to be my old self again, but I'm still trying to find it
After plaid shirt days and nights when you made me your own
Now you mail back my things and I walk home alone
But you keep my old scarf from that very first week
'Cause it reminds you of innocence and it smells like me
You can't get rid of it 'cause you remember it all too well, yeah
'Cause there we are again, when I loved you so
Back before you lost the one real thing you've ever known
It was rare, I was there, I remember it all too well
Wind in my hair, you were there, you remember it all
Down the stairs, you were there, you remember it all
It was rare, I was there, I remember it all too well"
i looked at her as she finished and she closed her eyes, "i want to add that to the tour."
i smiled and rubbed her back, "do it. i am in love with that song. it's perfect mom. it's going to be known everywhere. i know it. i can feel it."
she smiled and nodded, "thank you...for staying with me."
"of course." i said and kissed her temple.
i just want her happy again.
is that so much to ask?
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i need a new romance for taylor ;) i have 2 people in mind and i am stuck so feel free to throw me some ideas :D
review and comment :)
~stay fearless~
caleigh <13