It's Complicated ✔️

Chapter: 50 Just Ogling You

Nathan's POV

I might be looking calm and controlled, but from inside I am bursting with excitement. However, my excitement slightly fades when something... something important registers my mind, to which I was oblivious in my state of bliss. 

She never held my hand, I was the one who was holding hers. 

I sneak a glance at her, then focus back on the road. She is looking lost, as she is just blankly staring out... I want to ask her, but I know she needs time to completely open up to me. She is obviously dealing with a lot of stuff and in a small time, which we have spent together, I know she mostly keeps all her problems and troubles inside her. She is not the one who shares her pain, easily. 

In my mind, I go through all our conversation, to figure out what might have gone wrong that she is closed off again. I realize whenever I talk about something related to us there was a slight change in her demeanor, whenever she seemed surprised there was uneasiness too, to which I was ignorant. Maybe, unintentionally I came off too strong, I should be more careful how I react and speak around her. She is vulnerable and I have to keep that in my mind. 

But I would not let this tamper my mood because at least she agreed to come with me. It is a start which I need, slowly and gradually I will win back her trust too.

After parking the car, I turn off the engine, as we have reached the shopping mall. However, she is still consumed in her thoughts that she does not notice this, still, her eyes are fixed outside. I turn in my seat and take this opportunity to look at her. 

The way the evening sun, highlights her features leaves me breathless. I know she is beautiful, but at this moment she is looking beyond beautiful. The sun rays touch her face, casting a soft glow across her skin, making her look ethereal. Her normal brown eyes are looking a few shades lighter almost like honey, highlighting various shades of brown in her eyes. And her hair, damn... her hair is my weakness and now even getting slapped for touching them doesn't sound bad to me, they look so soft and shiny. 

Honestly, she is not the most beautiful girl I have ever seen, but her personality, her heart, and... yeah, her sassy attitude makes her beautiful, and also I am biased towards her.

I know it sounds creepy to stare her like this, but I don't care. 

There is nothing wrong in admiring my own wife.

I am so engrossed in studying her, that I have not realized that she is staring at me giving me a weird look.

"Please, tell me you have not started taking any illegal stuff?" she narrows her eyes in scrutinizing manner.

"No... I... just," I shake my head and stutter not knowing what to say.

Of course, I can't say... hey, it is nothing I was just ogling you. This will surely, earn me a slap. Last time when she slapped, trust me, my ear was ringing. And the last thing I want is a red cheek and a ringing ear while shopping with her.

"I was thinking about Miles gift," I lie.

"Ok," she says slowly, clearly not convinced with my lie.

I quickly get outside the car, before I can make more fool of myself. She is already out when I reach her side. I want to grab her hand, but I refrain from doing as I don't want her to get uncomfortable. 

Looking at the crowd inside the mall, my protective side overtakes my logical side, and before I can think what I am doing, I hold her hand startling her.

My chest constricts when I glance at her. She is looking at me with a frightened expression, taking small breaths from her mouth. I quickly release her wrist... wrist? Oh God, I am so dumb maybe he held her wrist. This thought makes me want to kill someone, specifically that bastard. I clench my jaw and exhale slowly through my teeth.