I Chose You- A Danisnotonfire / Dan Howell FanFic

Chapter 69: Why Did This Happen

Hey everyone! Sorry I haven't posted in a few days but because I screwed up and had to post 3 chapters in one night I figured I should wait it out a little xD Anyone watching X Factor right now? :'D Half of me hates the show half of me loves it haha! 

Also, if any of you have read any other fanfictions I might like to read, let me know in the comments? I tend to have Youtuber (Dan/Phil/Jack/Finn/Caspar etc fanfics in my library but also I ventured into that 1D shizzle because I'm running out of fanfics to read! I don't mind reading Phan stuff but I tend to prefer it when its heterosexual stuff (not in a rude way ofc, its just preference :) ) So I'd love it if you send me links or the names of fanfics that you have read and love :D

"Why did this happen. Why couldn't I do something about this?" I visibly shook as the tears streamed down my face. My therapist nodded, writing in her notepad. 

Why couldn't he just like...take off his jeans or something. Strip in front of all those people...

"Lia, I don't know whether you realized this, but when Jason fell onto the tracks, he died less than 5 seconds later."

I looked up, shocked. "No, the guy went to help him, he went onto the tracks himself." 

"No, on the cameras and people who gave statements said the man didn't step into the line of the train, he almost did, but he didn't."

I shook my head. "No. He tried to help him. He stepped onto....onto." I put my head in between my knees, trying to pull up previously repressed memories. But I couldn't see it anymore. Not since those nightmares.

As soon as I came home to Dan, he was quiet as he held me for the next few hours as I silently cried. I'd wake up every night from nightmares, memories of what had happened. They got so bad that Dan sat me down to discuss getting a therapist. This was my first appointment. 

She was a nice lady, who immediately told me to call her Julie, She seemed nice, but I was naturally very guarded. But I tried to be co-operative. Not for me, but for Dan. I could see it all over his face that he was scared. Scared I would fall into depression, or something else. I wasn't sure. 

Soon, our hour was up. She gave me a few things to do during my day and a notepad to write my thoughts on, and then I found Dan waiting for me. He smiled hopefully, and I put my head on his chest as he pulled me into a hug. 

"How was it?"

I shrugged. "Alright." I didn't want to go into it.

"What did you talk about?" He put his arm around my shoulders as we headed for the tube.

"Nothing."

"I don't think you sat there for an hour not talking, otherwise it's a waste of money."

"We talked about stuff." I could tell it's not what Dan wanted to hear, and he sighed, changing topic.

"Come on, let's get ourselves coffees. My treat."

I smirked. "Okay." I leaned into Dan's arm as we walked. When we got home with our coffees, I logged onto tumblr and saw something I definitely didn't want to see.

"Dan!" I yelled, causing him to run from his bedroom to where I was as I showed him what was on my tumblr screen. A picture of me and Jason holding hands. With the words 'Reblog so Dan can see how much of a whore his girlfriend is!!"

I was relieved to see a few notes saying support or arguing that Dan would block anyone who reblogged it, but it brought back horrible memories.

"This is from the day he died." I mumbled, and Dan groaned, taking my laptop from my lap and placing it on the top of the sofa, balancing it so he could log into his tumblr. I turned around so I could see what he was doing. He found the picture and reblogged it, deleting all the comments from the post.

Anyone who assumes Lia is cheating on me can stop right there. The guy she is with is her close friend and I appreciate everyone not intruding with our relationship. Thanks. 

He looked at me, smiling sadly. We both mentally agreed with each other to not tell the public about Jason, but it was in the news, so I guess someone might come across it and recognize him. The guy who pushed him was sentenced to prison for manslaughter, I heard.

Dan wrapped his arms around me and placed a kiss on my head. "Stay Strong, Lia."

"I have to." I sighed, shutting my eyes. 

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