Chapter 64

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Hey everyone!

This chapter was originally meant to be a lot longer, but I didn’t want to make everyone wait for ages; so I decided to upload this much.

While that might make you happy now, I’m sure you’ll hate me by the end of the chapter :D

And by the way, this isn’t a happy chapter, there’s quite a lot of reflection etc…

Anyway, enjoy!

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Chapter 64

 

 

Nick’s P.O.V:

 

 

Fuck, it was freezing. I reached to pull my hood up, the icy wind biting at the skin of my hands. In the time it took for me to withdraw my hands from my pockets, pull up my hood and stuff them back into the warmth of my hoodie, I felt like I had frostbite. Maybe sitting on a cold, wet bench for the last two hours or so, hadn’t been the best idea.

My clothes were damp and I felt like I was about two degrees away from turning into a Nicksicle. But what the fuck had I been supposed to do? When I left the café, there was no way I was just going to go straight back to that cold, dismal apartment to wallow in self-pity – and both Mark and Jay had made it clear that they didn’t want to see me for the rest of the day.

I needed more friends, I thought. Or, I corrected myself; I needed to just not fuck up the friendships I already had; easier said than done, though.

I’d found a bench in a relatively quiet area, determined not to go home; where everything reminded me of the one thing I wanted above all else. The one thing I couldn’t have. It had been a stupid idea on my part, because either way, I’d spent the last two hours thinking about the same thing; the same person.

Now I was just wet and cold on top of everything else. Maybe I deserved it. My shoulders hunched at the thought.

I stepped out onto the street, cutting diagonally across the road. The light rain was making visibility difficult; like looking at everything through a thin shroud.

I heard the loud and frantic beeping and turned my head to see bright lights heading my way.

Maybe I shouldn’t have just walked out into the middle of the road without looking right or left.

I quickened my pace, just missing being milled by the large SUV. I heard the driver cursing me but I just casually flipped him off and kept walking.

I thought back to when I’d been leaving the café; I’d been in two minds about whether or not I should tell Shannon that I’d apologised to Peter while she’d been working. I’d decided against it for some reason; probably because I didn’t want her thinking I’d only done it to make her happy. No, I’d done it because Peter deserved an apology.

It hadn’t been the easiest thing I’d ever done – I hated saying I was sorry - but I realised now what I’d done, and that the way I’d acted was wrong. Shannon was right when she said that it was my jealousy and petty hatred that made me act like a dick. I knew it was true, but at the same time; I didn’t know how to make those feelings go away.

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