Ch 94. Nothing To Understand

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Thought it was about time for a new chapter... So...Who likes short chapters?? xD Sorry, but you'll see why ;)

Btw, this one is dedicated to SalmaElgendy8! I made an interview for her magazine and I really want to thank you Salma! Here's the link! : http://www.wattpad.com/5001310-wattpad%27s-world-of-events-first-issue-smal-talk

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I've been going there nonstop. I've written so many songs for two weeks and even Emíne knows that I am doing something that she doesn't know about. The crew has been welcoming me all the time and I've made more songs than I've made when I debuted. Over five music videos has been uploaded on my YouTube account, and I've noticed many, many mails and comments but never dared to read them. If it was bad comments, I'd never dare to put up another one, and if it was a good I'd start hoping for them to forgive me, which is quite impossible.

I walked around town with a fat smile. This felt a bit like my new home. I could write music and sing as much as I wanted. I could do whatever I wanted and no one would give me a second glance or flash me with cameras. I am glad that Emíne took me here.

"Tourists!" Emíne half screamed and pulled me away into a corner. I sighed with relief.

"Thanks for being so observant." I said and looked around. I can't stay around relaxing thinking that everything will be fine, because it's not. If someone recognises me it will leak out and before I know it, they will fly over here and follow me. That'd be a nightmare.

I put on my glasses and the shade made everything so dark, just like my life.

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"Why are you writing so many songs?" I read from the Google Translate in my phone that my staff wrote in. I thought for a while and wrote it in.

"Because I have many feelings I need to let out." He read it and nodded as he looked at me.

"Ready?" I said in Japanese that I've learnt myself and went into the recording room. I took out my lyrics and they gave me a thumbs up. I wish I could stay in the music world. Because everything will always be fine here. Nothing can stop me.

When we were done I decided to directly film the music video and asked them for help. This time I wanted it to be outside with more change of location instead of just me singing in the studio. They nodded and grabbed so many professional cameras and stuff that I recognised from my previous works. We went somewhere quiet and without any people. Emíne did my make-up, which came out very good and we started shooting. I always took a glance at the side to see if there was people near to see me and worried all the time.

Why did I start this whole thing really? But I don't regret anything. If I didn't do it I wouldn't been able to sing this much and had met Darrén.

Why was I so obsessed with Darrén really?

"It's done!" Emíne yelled all excited and I took a look. It looked so similar to a normal music video and I couldn't help smiling. God I was complete. No not really but just saying.

"Bye!" I took my farewell with my staff as they packed and I left to the hotel with Emíne. I edited it all night and looked it over hundreds of times before posting just to see if there was any faults or hints of where I was. Nothing. So click, and it was up. I saw some comments flash up but forced myself to close my eyes and hide the whole comment with my hand, then close the window. Phew. I can't take their sweetness/nastiness now.

"She's fine." Emíne's voice whispered. She looked at me from the little space of the unshut door and I looked at the computer by impulse. It felt like she'd stop talking if she saw me hearing. I put a song on so she knew that I wouldn't hear.

She kept talking so I sneaked to the bathroom with open door to listen to what she said from her room next to it.

"She's been so much happier since last week. When we came she never smiled but now she smile a lot." Emíne said to the other person through the phone. Who was it?

"I plan to stay here for a long while, until the reporters calm down, okay? As long as no one tracks us here." True. It would be a good idea.

"What?" Emíne asked. "Oh. Yeah, I know about those videos. Really?"

I couldn't listen to it.. It's about the whole me uploading music videos and I didn't dare to hear the reaction of the people. I glided down sitting on the bathroom floor covering my ears.

Who was it anyway? Could it be Darrén? No, it has to be Ambreal. Darrén has to be furious. Only Ambreal knew about it before the news came out except of my family. And Dan. But why would Dan even bother?

But if it was Darrén? My body started shaking. I was excited, yet terrified. I don't know how to face him. But my excitement clearly won. I got the power to stand up, walking all weird. I want to know. Even if I clearly wasn't really for it, I took small steps to Emíne - reaching out for it. Darrén. I needed to talk to him now. I needed to make him forgive me. I needed to tell him everything.

Emíne saw my zombie state and jumped. I snatched her phone.

"D-Darrén?" I called. It was quiet.

"Krystal?" Ambreals sweet voice asked. I dropped the phone. God. Why was I so obsessed with him. Why did it have to be him? I ran out and threw myself on my bed. I didn't understand anything anymore. Nothing was understandable. And nothing clearly understood me. I couldn't get it.

I rolled myself into a ball in the thick cover, just trying to stop thinking. But I couldn't help any of my thoughts. I knew. Even if I didn't understand a thing at that time, there was one thing I did get.

I was utterly in love with Darrén. And I had always been. Those unknown special feelings I had towards him. He's the one I love. He was the one who was always so kind to me. Always saving me. Helping me. And he was the one who made me like syrup.

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OMG is your reaction now isn't it? :) After taking a long break from writing I'm finally back! I've kind of forgotten how fun it is to write but I really need to start something new I think. But I am kind of sad that it's ending soon... I think there are a lot of things that I've missed and that I need more time for my new story. But promise me to read my new story ok? xD

Right now the updates are so slow because I'm on vacation :) Luckily, I always store chapters for my cute readers. So sorry for the short chapter, but it was worth it??

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