Who do you Love? | Joey Graceffa&Sawyer Hartman

Chapter 38: How do you feel?

He frowns.

Sawyer: What do you mean?

I remove the washcloth from my head and sit up, crossing my legs.

Mariella: I mean, what are we?

He walks to the side of the bed and sits.

Sawyer: Why are you asking this all of a sudden?

Is he trying to avoid the question? I'm not so sure I should've asked.

Mariella: Well before, you said you would never date me and now it just seems like we're together or something. I don't know.

I turn away.

Sawyer: I didn't say I would never date you. I just said, "I wouldn't".

My heart starts to ache. I bring my knees up to my chest. Is he trying to let me down easily.

Sawyer: The only reason I said that was because I still had mixed feelings towards your sister. I never thought you would be interested in someone like me.

I purse my lips.

Mariella: Well, I never thought you would be interested in me either.

He faintly smirks.

Sawyer: When I first meet you, you reminded me so much of your sister.

That's not a good thing. I love her, but I'm my own person.

Sawyer: But then, once I got to know you better, I realized you're nothing like her and I shouldn't have compared you both from the beginning.

I turn back towards him, hopeful.

Mariella: Well, how do you feel now?

He scoots closer.

Sawyer: I care about you, a lot. When I asked you to go to dinner with me, I knew it wasn't a date, but I was glad you accepted.

Mariella: Even though it didn't turn out great..

Sawyer: One little mishap happened, so what? I got to spend time with you and that's all I wanted. Who cares if the waitress was a little bitchy. That's her problem.

So, he agrees with me.

Sawyer: I like spending time with you no matter what happens. I don't mind taking care of you or buying things that you need. I care for you and I want you to know that.

I grin.

Mariella: I care for you too.

He smiles, placing his hand on my knee.

Sawyer: You've learned a lot about me that I've been scared to tell anyone and I'm so happy you don't think of me differently. I'm just not sure I'm ready for a relationship.

He has been through so much. I guess, I can understand.

Sawyer: All I know is that I want to be around you everyday and when we're apart, I can't help but miss you. I didn't think we needed to label our relationship.

I shake my head.

Mariella: No. I didn't want to label us. I just wanted to hear this from you.

He lightly squeezes my knee.

Sawyer: Well, listen good Mariella. Because, whether you're my girlfriend or I'm your boyfriend.. I love you.

"He loves me?"

Mariella: I- I don't know what to say.

Sawyer: You don't have to say anything. When you're ready to tell me your feelings, I'll be there to listen.

I place my hand on his broad arm.

Mariella: No, that's not it. I just never thought you would say those words to me..

I lightly sway back and forth.

Mariella: I love you too, Sawyer.

I lower my legs, leaning in. He places his hand over my lips.

Sawyer: Remember? I'll get sick.

I sit back, flustered.

Mariella: Right. Sorry. Got caught up in the moment.

He pulls me into a tight embrace. It felt nice to rest my head on his shoulder and know that we had just confessed to each other. A small tear of joy, streams down my cheek. I let go, wiping it away.

Sawyer: Don't work yourself up.

I swat my hand.

Mariella: I'm fine. It just slipped out.

Sawyer: Just because we're not officially a couple, doesn't mean it won't happen in the future. I just need time.

Mariella: I know. I understand.

He gets up, leaning down, kissing my forehead.

Sawyer: Now. Rest!

Mariella: Okay, okay.

I lay back, placing the washcloth on my head.

Sawyer leaves as I lay there, thinking. We're not a couple now and I'm okay with that. Things can change later on and I'm willing to wait. I'm in no rush.

My mind starts to wonder and I think of Joey and Meghan. What will happen between them? I want to talk and be okay with Joey again, but I don't want any problems with Meghan. I just don't understand why she's acting so obsessive and weird all of a sudden. It's not like I'm going to steal Joey away.

I hear something coming from the end of the bed. I crawl over and dig through my clothes. My phone falls onto the bed, buzzing.

Mariella: Hello.

?: Are you okay, I heard about what happened?!