Who do you Love? | Joey Graceffa&Sawyer Hartman

Chapter 29: It's all up to me.

Waking up to my alarm this morning was hard. Veronica was still sound asleep beside me as I got up to jump in the shower. I was mentally and physically exhausted. Everything that had went on yesterday was still running through my head. I was just glad Veronica was safe and at home.

I wrap a towel around me as I quietly rummage through my closet for something to wear.

I put on a black tank top with a pair of acid washed skinny jeans and black keds. I tied my hair in low pigtails and put on gold hoop earrings.

I quietly turn the sink on, brushing my teeth. I look back ever so often to make sure Veronica was still asleep. I put on eyeliner, mascara and a light shade of gold eyeshadow.

I tip-toe around, grabbing my phone before lightly closing the bedroom door behind me. I take the car keys off the kitchen table and go to open the front door.

A scary thought crosses my mind.

What if I come home tonight and Veronica isn't here? Would she go off somewhere again? I mean, just because she doesn't have the car doesn't mean she can't call someone to pick her up?

I begin to worry. I can't start thinking about the "what if's" while I'm at work. It'll drive me crazy!

I wanted to call in and say I had a 'family emergency'.. But, it was only my second day. It would just seem fishy.

I try and brush off the bad thoughts as I turn the key to start the engine. My mind was on a rampage! I was frustrated. I felt like I was a mother constantly worried about her sick child. I didn't move in with Veronica to take care of her and have drama. I began to regret moving out here.

I reach the Cafe and slam the car door shut. Walking towards the entrance, I prayed today would be a calm, slow day.

I clock in, throwing on my apron. I kept repeating to myself, "Just smile and be pleasant, keep telling yourself that and everything will be okay".

I went about my day, taking orders, cleaning tables and serving the customers. My body was all in my work, but my head was somewhere else.

Claire: Mariella, can I talk to you for a second?

Mariella: Sure.

She pulls me aside towards the kitchen entrance.

Claire: Is something wrong?

She sees right through me.

Mariella: No. Why?

Claire: You seem out of it today.

Mariella: Oh. Am I slacking on the orders?

Claire: No. You just seem different.

She was right, I'm not myself. How does someone comprehend the fact that they just found out yesterday that their sister has been doing drugs.

I wanted to just open up and tell her everything. But, this situation is just too personal. I can't just go spewing out, "My sister is or use to be a druggy. What do I do? How do I react?" So, I play cool.

Mariella: I'm fine. Just a little tired.

She takes one final glance at my face.

Claire: Alright. You can go on your break now.

I faintly smile and walk outside. I felt like I wanted a drink or a cigarette. I don't even smoke. Just anything to calm my anxiety.

I look up at the sky. The clouds were jumbled together and turning grey. Great. It's gonna rain.

Joey: Hey..

Joey? What is he doing here?

Mariella: Hey. You come to eat again?

Joey: Not exactly.

He looks upset, even though he was slightly flashing his pearly whites.

Mariella: You okay?

He runs a hand through his hair.

Joey: I got kicked out..

Kicked out? I don't understand.

Mariella: What?

He smirks, leaning back on the wall beside me.

Joey: Sawyer kicked me out of the apartment.

No.

Mariella: Why would he do that?

Joey: Veronica was at the apartment last night and told him everything.

So, that's where she ran off too. To tell on Joey.

Joey: Sawyer and I got into an argument and he told me to pack my shit and leave.

Mariella: Where did you sleep last night?

Joey: I went to Meghan's.

Mariella: He can't stay mad at you forever..

Joey: I don't know. He said I betrayed his trust and he doesn't want a person like me in his life.

I can't believe this.

Mariella: You saved his life! If you wouldn't have told his parents-...

Claire: Mariella, your breaks over.

I look to her, slowly nodding.

Joey: I'll talk to you later.

He turns to walk to his car. I immediately grab his hand.

Mariella: Wait, Joey. Let me talk to Sawyer.

He shakes his head.

Joey: You don't-...

Mariella: I want too! This isn't right.

He gazes into my eyes and grins. He pulls me into a hug. My heart starts to pound. My mind felt at ease as he held me. He let go, saying goodbye as it started to rain. I watch him dash to his car before I went inside.

I need to talk some sense into Sawyer. I also needed to have a long overdue conversation with Veronica.

I guess, right now.. It's all up to me.