So... basically my friend told me the assignment I thought was due tomorrow wasn't, so Kay thought to herself "Now what should I be doing instead of that darn paper?"
So TADA!
It's short, but it's something :P
Hope you enjoy it! LOL
So read, enjoy, vote and comment!! :D
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I drove home, with a strange feeling. It wasn't happy because what Blake had shared with me was sad... I couldn't put a name to it, or a definition. It was just a bubbly feeling in my chest, one that seemed to fill all of it, take every empty place and more and made me feel... not special... but more?
I was happy to see that the lights were close when I got home.
I walked, almost skipped to the door, unlocked it and was really careful to not make too much noise.
But then as I walked pass the kitchen, I saw the light over the oven open and dad sitting at the counter with a cup of coffee in his hands and a bunch of files all around him.
"Care to say goodnight kid?" my dad asked, raising his head towards me.
Oh crap...
I didn't like the sound of his voice...
"What are you doing still up?" I asked, my voice still using the same tone it had in the cemetery...
"Looking over some bills for the company... and waiting for my daughter to come back from a boy's house..." he trailed, looking at me straight in the eyes.
He didn't look mad though... maybe amused... a little worried, but not mad... mostly emotionless. He was hiding what he really though, from me.
"Look dad..." Oh crap... how the hell was I supposed to explain this? "I'm sorry for coming home so late..."
"Are you?" he asked me.
What kind of question was that? He was making me nervous!
"Yes I am, I didn't want to worry you, seriously I would have come home earlier but I didn't know the time and Blake kinda needed to talk... and I needed to listen to him..."
"Should I be worried?"
"No! Not worry at all! Seriously dad! You don't have to worry about me and Blake! Like ever!"
"You sure?"
Okay seriously those little questions were making me edgy and worried now!
"Yes dad one hundred percent sure!"
"So I don't need to go through the sex talk again?"
OH GOD!
I think my eyeballs almost dropped out of their sockets.
And my dad started to laugh.
And I just let myself fall on a stool in front of the counter and dropped my head on my arms resting on the cold surface, pushing a few sheets away.
"Please dad, we REALLY don't need to go through this, TRUST me!" I whined.
"Kid you should see your face right now. It's moments like these we need to take pictures and put it in the family album" he laughed more and patted my head.
"Not funny dad..."
"No, true it's not funny!" he said and composed himself "And I'm serious here kid. I don't want to have to worry every time you leave the house to go see your little After School Special-"
"My what?" I hissed, raising my head.
"Don't interrupt kid" dad chuckled "I just want you to be careful you know? I don't want you to make mistakes... I don't want you to regret anything..."
"Don't worry dad!"
"Well you know, kids always say that and then they come home and announced that they're expecting twins and that they're going to leave us the babies because they want to find their hippies side down in Guatemala... I love you kid but I ain't raising another baby!"
I don't know if I was supposed to laugh or drop my head on the counter again and hit it a few times...
"Again dad, trust me you don't need to worry!" I assured him.
I didn't want to go into al the specifics of the whys it would be impossible starting by the really obvious fact that well... Blake and I... not happening... I mean he was Blake... he trusted me, yes, but would he ever want to BE with me? That was pretty hard to believe... I mean he could have ANYONE he wanted... why in hell would he want ME? I was his friend. He trusted me. And so far, it stopped there. And I had to keep myself in check, because I didn't want to loose that, or scare him away... I wanted him to be part of my life, I wanted to keep talking with him and making jokes with him and hanging out with him... I didn't want to lose that for something that wasn't going to happen... right?
I didn't want to lose Blake and go back to the time when I wasn't speaking with him. I knew Blake now and it was a nice feeling.
But I just didn't trust myself to be enough...
I mean what did I have to offer that Blake couldn't find in anyone else? Because I mean every time it seemed like "something" was going to "happen" between us he would just back away... He probably wanted us to just stay friends...
"What are you thinking about kid?" dad asked, breaking me from my mind rambling, touching my arm.
"Nothing..." I trailed shaking my head slightly.
"You know... it worried me... when your mom left and then your sister... I was worried, still worry, that you don't have a feminine presence in your life. You know someone older you can talk with about all those things..." dad frowned.
"I'm perfectly fine dad. I don't want to sound like a broken record, but trust me, you don't have to worry about me. At all!" I said again.
"Alright... because see... here's the thing... Your brother's been low lately... and I wanted to take him to a basketball game on Wednesday. We'd come back Thursday night... but I mean, if it seems like I should worry about you..." he trailed.
"I can always stay at Alex's" I offered.
"Yes I know... and I can trust you too... I mean I know it's kind of unfair, and I'd take you but I could only get my hands on two tickets, but if you want to come and go shopping while we're there or something I'd be more than happy to have you with us too..."
"Well I have a play to do on Thursday... plus you guys need boy time" I smiled a little.
It could have been fun to go, but I just didn't feel like it... plus I would probably be like the third wheel or something...
"So I can trust you?" my father asked, picking up all the sheets scattered everywhere around him.
"Yes dad"
"Alright... now go to sleep kid, you have school tomorrow" he smiled and I got up, hugged him and ran upstairs.
I mean it wasn't like it was going to be a big deal, I was alone quite often. Plus it was a week day, and I wasn't Anna. It's not like I was going to throw a party!
I got in my room, took my shower and went to bed, falling asleep automatically, much more tired than I had expected.
Next morning, when my alarm went on, I didn't go back to sleep. It's like I couldn't. I was wide awake. I woke Ty up, and then wanted to fix myself some breakfast but when I sat and stared at my eggs, I just didn't feel like eating.
That was weird. I took a few bites, but it was like I was already full.
What the hell? Was I getting sick, or covering something?
I hoped not...
I was more enthusiastic about going to school than usual. But I was scared a little too.
I mean, how the hell should I act around Blake now? Was I supposed to be like I always was?
Or should I act differently because I knew about so much more now?
"Keep grinning like that and you'll scare kids away Lex, you look like a freaking clown" Ty laughed beside me in the car, changing my station.
I just rolled my eyes at him.
When we reached school, Ty left on his side and me on mine.
Daphnee quickly caught up with me.
"I NAILED him!" she exclaimed, both hands up in the hair doing the peace sign.
"What?" I burst laughing.
"The guy at the flea market! Duh! Well I mean technically he gave me his phone number but whatever" she trailed, giving a quick shove of her hand dismissing the matter.
I laughed more rolling my eyes "So you gonna call him?"
"Are you out of your mind? I'm not calling him! He made me suffer long enough! I'm gonna give his number to some sexual harasser or something, or just do the job myself and call in the middle of the night and ask what he's wearing and if he likes dominatrix!!" she grinned mischievously.
I stared at her in disbelief, stopping dead in my track right at the school doors "What?"
"Oh you heard me! Two can play that little game!" she grinned even more.
"But he just ignored you?"
"Just?"
"Kitty, Dadda" a voice said behind us and I turned around to find an ever smiling Alex.
"Hey Papa Bear!" I smiled and Daph just slapped his butt and then skipped to god knew where.
"What's going on with her?" Alex laughed.
"The flea market guy" I stated and walked with him to my locket, the halls already crowded.
"Oh god, don't bring that up again..." he whined making me laugh "That was torture..."
"There's only one Daphnee..." I chuckled.
"Yes, one is quite enough..." he answered shaking his head and leaned against the locker beside mine "So... how was the funeral... and Anna?"
"Anna torture, funeral alright..." I trailed, not wanting to go into the specifics.
For some reason I kinda felt like I shouldn't be speaking about everything that happened with Blake...
"Is something wrong?" he frowned.
I smile "No everything is fine! What about you? How are you doing?" I asked and closed my locker, walking to my first class.
"Everything's fine... well more than fine" he smiled hugely "And about that... do you want to go out one night, you, me, Daph and Travis... proper introduction and all?"
He actually looked worried.
"I'll be glad to!" I smiled as hugely as him and then wrapped my arm on the side of his waist, leaning my head against his shoulder "I'm happy for you Alex..." I told him and then let go.
"I'm happy too..." he still smiled.
We kept walking and I tried to not look around me TOO much to find Blake... because well... I kinda wanted to see him, in a real none obsess and stalkerish kind of way!
And then something, well more specifically someone sorta pinched my sides, saying "BOO!" in my ear.
I yelped in surprise, and then turned on myself, already knowing who I'd see.
"God Blake you scared me!" I laughed a little and punched lightly his chest.
Alex didn't wait and just kept on walking, towards Mark and Dwayne, smiling a little, weirdly actually...
Blake grabbed my hand, stopping my movement, smiling a little "So unobservant, aren't you Pumpkin?"
"Ya I think we both clearly know I am now" I snorted, praying in my head that he wouldn't drop my hand, but then mentally cursing myself for thinking that way.
And then the bell rang.
"Come on let's go, we'll be late" he said, the smile still apparent on his perfect lips and then, still holding absentmindedly my hand, tugged me forward and we walked to our Chemistry class.
What was that supposed to mean? Did it mean something?
Oh god...