The Advice Column IV

797

Advice Request
This person wants to come out but everyone around them is quite homophobic.

Answered Submission
Hello,

I'm sorry to hear about your situation, and I'm sorry I don't have much to offer in terms of advice, but I will certainly do my best. In a case like yours, where the people in your life are not supportive (or just plainly against) what you believe in and stand for, coming out about it is a very difficult thing. Coming out is a hard thing to do anyway, even without the fear of potential backlash from loved ones and peers. It is a good thing to be proud and honest about who you are, and the things that you identify with. That being said, it is not always the best thing to do depending on the situation. For example, if you are reliant upon your parents for financial support, if you live with them, etc., telling them about your gender identity or sexual orientation when you know they are blatantly against non-straight/cis identities might not be the best thing to do. There is almost no benefit in making your life harder than it may already be by telling people things about yourself that you deem important that they will respond to poorly.

Now, that doesn't mean don't ever tell people. It is obviously important to you. I would just suggest waiting until you are able to be on your own. Make sure you can live your own life apart from your family and schoolmates before you tell them, so you have something to fall back on if they don't respond well. In the meantime, if you have any close friends who you trust with this information, try talking to them about it. But do be careful with this. Be who you are. Be honest with yourself, and be unapologetic to others, but be mindful of who you let into that part of you.

I hope this helps, love. Message us again if you ever want more advice!

Stay strong,
The Advice Column Team