Roses And Thorns (UNDER HEAVY EDITING)

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-Loneliness.

I had been alone for quite a while now, and the quiet had been peaceful, growing on me and embracing me with it's predictability. 

There had been moments however where waves of loneliness would creep in suddenly and start to slowly suffocate me. 

Although I understood that as humans, we needed connection, all I wanted was to stay alone, and keep protecting my own peace in my individual bubble. 

I was still healing, and wasn't particularly in a rush to make new friends and put myself out there again. Being alone was too addicting to give up on. 

Then loneliness had to make an appearance, because isolation was quite frankly a double edge sword. 

And before I realized it, I wasn't happy in my solitude anymore, and I was longing for connection. 

I started to go back to familiar places I used to go to, and eventually reconnected with people from the past, only to feel a glimpse of what I used to feel when I had numerous faces around me, bringing noise and chaos into my life. 

That environment felt familiar, like a fever dream that was far better than my dull reality that had been suffocating me lately.

I was willing to escape the frustration that came out of repetitive days, even if I wasn't really picking wisely the crowd I was hanging out with. 

Anyone would've made the cut at that moment. Loneliness was heavy, and I needed that escape, even at the expense of my own peace.