Roses And Thorns (UNDER HEAVY EDITING)

20

-I'm a fighter.

It has been a while since I wrote anything.
I figured I might be tired in a way that can't be put into words and molded into art.
Maybe my lows don't belong on paper, and writing won't always heal me.

What if we were supposed to live with some extra thoughts on our minds, at least until we realize this is what it has come to, that is reality. 

I always found myself lonely, even when I was surrounded by people, and I often got attached to them, and ended up disappointed. I was making sense of life from a different angle, and getting used to what I once saw as life-altering events. 

People could be deceiving, just as much as I could disappoint. We all hurt each other, sometimes unintentionally. Life had that type of balance about things and was meant to make you stronger that way. We didn't learn from joy; we grew from pain.

I came to realize how temporary everything was, and how important it was to pick wisely your battles. I've lost and learned in a few years, in a way that changed me permanently. I found myself and grew stronger along the road of bittersweet memories I made. 

It took a few broken promises to make me re-evaluate who to trust, and a few more fake people to make me see the world from another perspective. I used to love people, but I wasn't so keen on them anymore.

I realized that even if I turned out wrong about the characters of the book that is my life, I could be tougher than the hardships and betrayals. I had a stubborn fighter in me, that is willing to fight for a happy ending.

Screw prince charming and perfect friends, perfection is highly overrated nowadays, it's a lie that we like to believe, until we drain ourselves of our sanity. We all have darkness inside. And I'm learning to appreciate mine and improve myself on all levels, so love and friendship can wait, or come, either way I'm definitely ready.