Touch Me

Die For You

I woke up early that morning and decided to use the extra time to try and get some food down. I snuck down the stairs quietly, grabbing another handful of grapes and sneaking back up the stairs. Not a lot, but an improvement.

Soon enough, it was time for me to get ready for school. I completed my usual routine, throwing on the jacket Kevin had given me on, walking out of the house. I was met by Kevin at the door as usual, but much to my surprise, he was beaten black and blue.

"..Kevin, what the hell happened to you?" My heart dropped

"We gotta go. Quickly" He sped off and I followed, until we were out of sight of my house

"Kev, what's wrong? How did that happen?"

"Well, uh, it turns out that going to the hospital with you without repercussion was a bit too good to be true.."

"What do you mean...?"

"When I got home, your father was there. My mom was at work, and he uh... he'd followed me. And.. Well, you can guess..."

"Oh shit. Kev.... I'm so sorry. I-I shouldn't have gotten you involved. I knew it wouldn't end well.."

"I-It's okay. I'm fine."

"You've got a bloody lip, you're not fine!"

"Connor, you've gone through much worse. I'll be just fine."

I was right when I thought I would screw his life up. I knew I shouldn't have let him into this fucking mess. I can't keep him wrapped up in this. He'd be so much better off without me getting him into all this shit.

Maybe if I distance myself from him enough, he'll just forget about me. Maybe he'll realize how much better off he is and break it off, himself. He won't be dragged into my problems anymore. The last thing I want is to leave that boy, but I can't put him in danger. I've put him through so much bullshit, I can't keep doing it to him. He lost his father because of me, and now mine was following him home and beating him. I can't put him through any more. I just can't.

"Connor, you alright? You're not talking too much.." He observed, reaching his arm around me, his hand on my back.

I stiffened up immediately

"Yeah... I'm fine..."

"... You know, aside from what happened with your dad and I, I did really have a fantastic time with you yesterday.. I really loved being with you." He smiled softly, attempting to ease my mind

God, that smile could shatter any barriers I even try to put up between us.

"I had a nice time too... I'm so sorry about my dad. I shouldn't have gotten you involved....I-I feel like you'd be better off without me, you wouldn't have to worry about this shit.."

He stopped and turned to me, taking his hand off of me.

"What do you mean, Connor?"

"I feel like I'm just... a burden, at this point.. he hurt you because of me.."

"Sunshine, you are not a burden. I love you. Your father isn't going to scare me out of being with you.. he's not going to bully me away."

"I just feel like a burden in general, especially to you. And sometimes I just... feel like you're better off without me and my problems. Like everyone's better off without me and my problems.."

"... What do you mean...?"

"I-I don't know. I'm sorry. It's stupid...It's not important..Let's just get to school." I started walking again, trying to stop the conversation.