Hired as Harry Styles's Agent

Part 25 - A girl inside

Eirin’s POV

Harry looked sad at me as I closed the door as we both went our separate ways. We didn’t talk, and Harry didn’t even talk to me. Every time I looked over to him in the plane he looked away, I knew he was giving me space but this was crazy.

I can’t handle feeling like this, like his leaving me. I don’t want him to leave me but I guess he’s tired of me. We’ve been together for months and months now every day together, every second together.  Maybe this super star is tired and wants someone else, I’m not a party girl or a really fun girl. Maybe that’s why he’s leaving me.

I walked back and forth thinking about walking over to Harry, I’m tired of crying, I don’t want to freaking cry again. Grabbing a few things on the living room table I threw them into the wall going crazy throwing everything I had everywhere.

‘’I FUCKING HATE THIS’’ ‘’I DESERVE THIS’’ ‘’I’M HURTING EVERYONE I LOVE’’ I yelled kicking over a few decorations and lamps.

A loud knock came on the door making me jump up in the air, it kicked me back in the present making me stare around the room looking at my mess. ‘’Coming just wait a minute’’ I yelled hiding all the broken pieces and taking up the lamps.

I walked over to the door opening it finding Niall. ‘’HI!’’ I screamed jumping into his arms hugging him. ‘’This is literally just what I needed’’ I smiled as he wrapped his arms around me. ‘’We need to talk’’ he whispered serious making me think it was something bad.

He walked passed me into my living room as he stared around the room. ‘’What happened here?’’ He asked worried and I stared down at the floor as I sat down on the couch. ‘’Harry’s really… not good’’ he whispered sad.

‘’I know.. He’s.. I’m.. it’s my fault’’ I whispered trying to hold my head together. ‘’Eirin it’s not your fault, It’s nobody’s fault. Going on tour with us, being together every second is hard. The boys and me argues sometimes because we’re a little tired of each other but you don’t see us breaking the band apart. You’re perfect together, he loves you with his whole heart and he even… he.. he wants to marry you..’’ Niall stepped over to me hugging me while I sat there frozen like a rock.

‘’Why does it feels like this, like he’s living me. Why does it feels like we’re sliding apart from each other. I’m only bringing hurt to him, I’m a burden for him and I have been since the beginning. The way he looks at me now, it’s like he only sees a girl dying and I don’t want to be that girl anymore. I can see he’s worried every time I see her. I can feel what’s happening, I’m losing him… And it’s killing me. The pain in my chest, my eyes burning.’’ Niall stared at me with so much sympathy making me feel like I could break any moment.

‘’What am I going to do?’’ I whispered staring into Niall’s crystal blue eyes. ‘’Don’t over think it, one day apart is probably going to be god for you both. ‘’ He smiled comforting me.

‘’Thank you Niall for always being there for me, I love you’’ I whispered and he smiled leaning down as I leaned down putting my head on his chest. ‘’I love you too’’ he whispered back stroking his hand down my arm.

‘’Niall… Why are you single?’’ I asked slowly gazing up to meet his eyes. ‘’I can’t hurt a girl by not loving her, my heart’s already taken by someone else.’’ He seemed sad by saying that. ‘’Are you lonely?’’ I whispered and he stared out into the room.

‘’I have my four best friends and I have you… That’s all I need..’’ he whispered slowly sliding his hand down to me locking his fingers in mine. ‘’Let’s watch a movie, I’ll make popcorn, can you put on a movie?’’ I asked Niall standing up.

I made the popcorn and walked over to the couch again. ‘’I didn’t know what kind of movie so I decided for a TV show. I hope The vampire diaries are okay?’’ He smiled jumping down in the couch lifting his arm around me as I laid my head on his chest. He laid blankets over us and I relaxed feeling his warmth and somehow I felt really safe with him.

But his my friend, my bestfriend. I Love Harry and even if Niall’s amazing and special, and even if I love him it’s not the kind of love I have for Harry. But it’s easy being with Niall, he doesn’t look at me the hurt and concerned way like Harry, he doesn’t see the dead girl, the girl who keeps dying and keeps getting hurt.

He sees me, it’s easy and I need it. But I’ll never love him like Harry, that’s just it. And I don’t want to lose him as my best friend.

After two hours Niall fell asleep holding his arms around me, I slowly lifted his hands off me as I walked into the bathroom changing cloths and peeing.

I walked back seeing Niall sleep so calmly and peaceful, I silently laid the blanket over him as I walked over to my front door. Opening it seeing Harry’s door I wondered if I should walk over to him, it’s just a knock.

I rang the doorbell and I heard someone run around the room steps coming closer to the door, I thought about running into my apartment again not feeling strong enough. Harry opened the door, his hair was pointing everywhere and he was only wearing boxers.

He looked confused seeing me and shocked. ‘’Um.. I.. Hi?’’ I questioned as he stood there looking twice at me. ‘’Oh.. Hi’’ He didn’t smile at me, he had that look like he had done something wrong and felt guilty.

‘’Can we talk?’’ I asked and his face dropped a little more, maybe because I made it sound like I was thinking about breaking up with him. ‘’Uhm.. mhm yeah, can I come to your apartment.. I haven’t cleaned yet.’’ He stumbled over his words sounding nervous.

‘’What’s going on?’’ I asked and suddenly I heard a rambling sound inside his apartment as someone was running around. ‘’Are you busy? i.. I can come back later’’ I whispered trying to not think about maybe a slut running around naked.

‘’Harry? Honey can you please help me here’’ A woman’s voice yelled from inside the apartment making my eyes immediately water. ‘’Is… that.. are you… is there a girl inside with you, while you’re in your boxers.’’ I smiled as a tear slowly fell down, as I tried hiding my pain.

‘’Eirin.. Yeah.. But’’ Harry started and I smiled. ‘’Oh, it’s fine. I’ll talk to you later, you’re busy. It’s fine. I’ll talk to you later H… Harry’’ I whispered smiling turning away quickly walking to my door opening it I didn’t turn around to face Harry. I heard him mumble something but I slammed the door closed.

I ran to my bedroom running past Niall sleeping I saw him move sitting up as I slammed my bedroom door closed. ‘’Eirin what’s going on, please open the door.’’ I heard Niall yell knocking on my door. I took my headphones on putting loud music on so that I didn’t hear Niall.

Crawling under my duvet hugging my pillow as my eyes burned high, my chest felt like someone kept kicking me. My breathing kept going up then slowing down. Crying feeling all the pain more then ever I didn’t know what I was going to do. I’m tired of crying, but hearing Harry have a women inside his apartment, his hair looked like had been having sex and he was only wearing his boxers.

Thinking about this I panicked feeling more lost. I cried out my body feeling numb, and my cries getting louder and louder.