Adommy One Shots

Am I Better Off Dead, Am I Better Off A Quitter?

Written by Glitterbaby2016

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He had a sort of solemn expression, gazing out the window as snow showered the world around him. It danced and fluttered in the harsh breeze, coating the trees in a gorgeous layering of cloud-like ice.

It was so beautiful, and yet a lump had lodged itself in his throat.

How could I have been blind for so long?

It's been over a year since he had fallen in love with Sauli, and yet, tears were collecting in his eyes because he missed him, so much. That little blonde with the heart-stopping smile and shimmering brown eyes... full lips and long eyelashes. Porcelain skin, soft to the touch, a small frame easy to hold. Long fingers, tough at the tips.

Tommy Joe Ratliff, the small man Adam desired for so long.

He had his fun on stage, but in the process unknowingly swept him off his feet and ever since then, Adam ignored it all. He was single, flirting didn't matter. Before Tommy got his chance to speak up, Sauli's smile captured Adam's heart, and Tommy was now his best friend, his supporter. Tommy, though, was a broken smile, a laugh that secretly shook with pain.

Why was love so cruel? Adam folded his fingers and rested his chin atop them as he watched the snow fall.

He was where he always went when he needed to take a break from the star-filled towns of California- Portland. Oregon was such an open, relaxing place he could go to. And it snowed up there, instead of turning a dull sort of cool and murky.

Another sigh echoed throughout Adam's hotel room as he hung his head, holding back whimpers. Adam was here this time because Sauli got pissed. For some reason, Adam seemed distanced. Sauli claimed he was ignoring him and spending too much time with others when they could be together.

Sauli wasn't cruel- he understands that time with friends is a necessity. But Sauli was right. Adam was avoiding him, saying he was busy that night when in reality he was getting a drink with some old friends. And only a few nights ago, Sauli caught him in the act.

With Tommy.

No, nothing was happening, but Tommy was drunk off his ass and hanging all over Adam, mumbling about how he loved Adam and how hurt he was when Sauli came into their lives, and then even had the guts to turn to Sauli and go, "Speak of the fucker 'emself..." and broke down into sobs. The next morning, Tommy had forgotten everything except for a painful headache and dry eyes from crying. Adam couldn't speak, and instantly arranged a hotel room in Portland.

Before that night, he had no idea Tommy was holding back his pain since then.

How could I been so stupid, so blind?

Now that it was spelled out in words before him, now that drunk blabber had explained the scattered pieces- Adam understood. He could now see that Tommy was hurt, in pain, crying almost every night; he even attempted to stay with that girlfriend he had for about a month, but it didn't work out because 'he didn't love her' when in reality Tommy was too distracted by Adam.

Fuck it all. Adam ran his fingers through his hair in aggravation, and heart a soft knock at his hotel door. He froze in confusion, sniffing and standing up, wondering who could be at his hotel door. He hoped to god it wasn't some stalker fan, because he was in no mood for putting on a fake smile for some photos.

But to Adam's amazement, low and behold, a little blonde with big brown eyes was biting his lip nervously and looking up at him as he opened the door. Adam froze, dumbfounded, staring into Tommy's eyes with no words to say. A tear unwillingly strolled down his cheek, and Adam gasped, whipping around and wiping it away.