Serendipity (Book 2)

Remember This Moment by Kari Kurofai

FanFiction.net

Remember This Moment by Kari Kurofai

TV » iCarly
Rated: K+
Language: English
Genre: Romance & Drama
Characters: Freddie B., Sam P.
Words: 2,039
Published: Jul 28, 2011

***

" . . . Sorry . . ."

"I-it's cool . . ."

With his head in his hands, Freddie remembers that moment more than any other. His heart still pounds when he thinks of it, even now. The feeling of Sam's lips on his so suddenly, the flutter of his heart and the way he inhaled sharply in surprise. He can recall with perfect clarity how the breeze ruffled Sam's hair just so when she pulled back, the dim glow of the lights from the school making the blush that stained her cheeks barely visible in the night.

The bright lights of the hospital are so bright in comparison to that night, and it hurts his eyes just to look at them. So he keeps his face in his hands to avoid them, steadying his breathing and trying not to panic.

Everything is going to be okay, he tells himself. It doesn't help much. Freddie has always been quick to panic by nature, just like his mother, but he's for the most part grown out of it over the years. Or at least he likes to think so. He's learned to stand on his own, for the most part, and hold his own as well. There have been lots of moments when he's proven that, but this is not one of them.

Freddie drags his palms from his eyes down over his chin as he sucks in a breath, wrinkling his nose at the overly sanitary hospital smell that reminds him all too much of his mom. It almost makes him want to gag, but he doesn't. Getting sick now would be no help to anyone.

Putting his head back in his hands Freddie remembers a different night, with lighting just as dim and a moment just as heart racing. He remembers with perfect clarity the way Sam shifted closer to him with the faintest uncertainty on the window ledge leading to the fire escape. Though her voice had been annoyed when she'd muttered, "Well, lean," he has never forgotten the way she couldn't lean first. It was little insecurities like that that only Freddie ever noticed about her. And it was a long time before he realized why that was so important.

"Can I . . . Can I think about it?"

He'd been so stupid, so utterly and completely stupid. But what was he supposed to say? Sam was staring at him with a look on her face like a kid who'd eaten cookies before dinner and knew they'd done something wrong. But he put his hands on her upper arms when she blinked sadly up at him and drew her close, whispering a soft, "Please, I just need time to think. That's all I ask."

What else was he supposed to say? For half his life he'd been living under the perfect illusion. He loved Carly, Carly didn't love him, and Sam hated his guts. And so passed the days of his life. To have Sam suddenly kiss him like she had, he couldn't think of anything else to say. His world had been flipped over and he had no way to put it back to where it had been before.

Carly had been pissed at him of course. He hadn't expected anything less when she'd grabbed him and slammed him into the lockers in a way that would have made Sam proud.

"Don't hurt her," she'd whispered. Something in Freddie broke then. How could Carly even think he'd hurt Sam intentionally? Then again, their whole relationship before then had revolved around hurt and be hurt. It would be only natural if he took a chance to turn the tables. That is, if he was a vengeful, spiteful person like that. Which he wasn't. However, he'd still needed time.

Time he didn't have. God, he'd almost been too late. He remembers, as he rubs his temples to fend off a headache under the glaring hospital lights, the anguished look Sam gave him when she said her mother was moving. Carly had told her she could stay at their place, but Sam had refused. She was too proud. And he had said nothing.