Serendipity (Book 2)

Rock, Proposals, Splinters by messy heart

FanFiction.net

Rock, Proposals, Splinters by messy heart

TV » iCarly
Rated: T
Language: English
Genre: Humor & Romance
Characters: Freddie B., Sam P.
Words: 1,323
Published: Jun 20, 2011

***

Let's get married.

Are you fucking insane? We're in high school and we've been together for all of four months.

I'm not insane.

Oh, right. Because my perfectly sane boyfriend would propose to me while waiting in line for a movie.

I'm sure it's been done before.

Yeah, okay. We're fucking sixteen-year-olds, all right? Now shut your trap and give me money. Mama needs her popcorn.

...

Let's get married.

Awgawd, I am having you committed. I am telling your mom that you caught her crazy and that you need professional help.

I'm crazy because I want to marry you?

Whatevs, nub. We've been together for a year.

Happy anniversary-

Yeah. Like I said: Whatever! Happy assyversary, nub.

...

What?

...

The silent treatment? Really?

Assyversary? Really?

Yeah, well. You're not the only one who can say stupid things, nub.

Nyeah.

Nyeah. Order me the steak, will you?

...

Let's get married.

Do you want to die?

...

Let's get married.

I am going to kill myself. You see that bridge? Stop the car. I'm jumping off that bridge.

...

Let's get married.

That's it! Outside! NOW!

...

Let's get married.

Do you not remember what happened the last time?

That was hardly traumatic or even painful. Your fists have turned puny and very lady-like from dissuse.

They are not puny! You're puny!

Oh noe! I am so threatened by your lame comeback!

You want to die?

Why do you always ask me that question?

Why do you always ask me that question?

Touche.

...

...

That's it? Touche? That's all I get? No explanation?

Can you believe we're graduating from college soon?

Oh, great. Yeah. Change the topic.

I love you.

I hate you.