♥Hello :)
So I wasn't able to update that quickly bc of school and this amaazing series called My Mad Fat Diary (you should definitely watch it).
Anyway! Here's the chapter. Thanks for all of the votes, reads and comments. They're all sweet and some of them are just.. honest. But that's okaay bc what's the fun of being an author without people judging your effort?
(yea fuck you bitches) ^-^
Orite cupcakes. enjoy♥
-"Why didn't you tell me before?", I asked, leaning on the counter while gently pressing my palm against the steaming cup of tea my mum's friend, Erin, had offered.
-"I'm so sorry babygirl, I just.. I couldn't find a way to tell you this without making you feel upset", she said.
-"Oh mother", I sighed.
-"Jade, listen. I know I should have told you before anyone else had revealed this to you, but you were going through such a hard time at school and my motherly selfishness kept reminding me to make you happy. I did not want to become a reason why you were upset", she said.
I stared at her and lastly gave her a sugary smile.
-"Come here", I said, spreading my arms to let her fall onto my chest.
She let out a hum and whispered things I could not understand.
-"What did you say?", I questioned.
-"It feels lovely to see you this positive and happy", she said.
I grinned at the prettiest lady in the world (for me) and kissed her head.
There was a door knock, and we both turned our heads to the door.
-"I'll go get that one!", Erin sang.
She opened the door and shut it immediately, slamming the door onto a man's fingers.
-"Sweet Lord! I'm so sorry!", she shrieked with her Geordie accent that sounded almost like mine.
-"Agh! It hurts!", the man exclaimed.
-"Uh! Jade, it's a reporter and I accidentally smashed his fingers with the door. Can I let him in?", she worriedly asked.
-"If it doesn't bother you, because I am fine", I said.
-"Oh, uuugh!", the guy groaned while Erin let him in.
Other people were outside trying to push themselves into the house, so I stood up and chased them away.
-"Please don't", I said.
-"Jade, listen to us!", they all said. I ignored them and shut the door carefully, watching out for fingers.
I locked the door and headed towards the kitchen, where Erin was pursing a plastic bag with ice onto the man's hand.
-"Sorry", she said.
-"You need to be careful, this hurts", he protested.
-"I am sorry", she repeated.
-"Yeah I heard it the first time", he snorted, furrowing his eyebrows and moaning in displeasure as Erin poked his finger with her own.
-"Stop whining and shut up", I commanded. I would not have been this rude, but he was being a dick to one of the sweetest women on Earth.
He bit his lip and stomped his feet, leaving dirt on the neat floor.
-"Hey, stop it please? I swear I will kick you out with my own feet", I said.
-"Done", Erin said, revealing a lovely finger with a nice bandage on it.
-"Where are the manners?", I asked.
-"Thanks", he muttered at Erin, who was glancing up and down at him with a disgusted face.
-"Get out, now", I said.
-"A few questions?", he asked.
-"No, get out please? I have had enough", I said.
-"I promise I will get rid of all the annoying people outside if you answer these questions", he implored.
-"And the annoying people inside as well?", I asked, recieving a blank stare.
I mouthed you and pointed at him.
-"Yeah, whatever", he said.
-"Sure then", I said.
-"What do you think about Harry's current tweet?", he asked. I tilted my head to the side and waited for him to explain.
-"Look", he said, aproaching me while scanning through his phone.
-"It says: "I wanted to wait, but apparently I can't". What does that mean?", he asked.
I shrugged and decided that was the answer to his question.
-"Oh come on", he said. I pushed him out and said goodbye.
-"I am so sorry", I told Erin.
-"Oh sweetie, it's perfectly fine. It's quite nice to have guests in here, I was starting to feel lonely but after your mum's visit I've been feeling everything but loneliness", she lied, or I thought she did.
Who really enjoys getting knocks on the door from paparazzis asking questions that are none of their business?
-"I should head back home", I said, walking towards the counter and drinking up the last sips of tea off the warm cup.
-"You can stay as much as you want Jade", she said.
-"No, thank you though", I said, smiling at her and giving her a hug.
-"See you soon mummy", I said, giving her a hug as well.
-"Goodbye babygirl", she said.
-"By the way, do you have a back door?", I asked.
-"We have a small balcony with a ladder connected to its fences on the second floor. You can climb it down if that's okay", Erin answered.
-"It's perfect", I said.
-"Let me show you", she said, waving her hand at me to follow her upstairs.
We got to a small room with lilac walls and a tiny bed on the middle.
-"It used to be my daughter's room", Erin sighed. She probably missed her daughter a lot.
I nodded and smiled as she opened the door to a tiny balcony with a wooden ladder on it.
-"She liked to climb down to the garden", the woman said, placing her hand on the wooden fence.
-"Where do I go?", I asked, looking down.
-"Just climb down and open that gate. If you walk through that street you'll find a big road", she said, pointing at the direction.
-"Okay. Thank you so much", I said, giving her a hug.
My mum had followed us as well, so I gave her a hug once again and hopped over the fence, holding onto the ladder.
-"Watch your step Jade", my mum warned.
I gave her a reassuring grin and carefully climbed down.
I finally got to the safe ground and waved at them as they waved back.
I silently made my way to the gate, watching as some reporters were now sitting on the ground near the front door.
I quietly opened the gate that seemed like it had not been used for years, and slowly stepped outside.
Some people recognized me, but wondered ifnit actually was me.
I pressed my crossed arms against my chest and furrowed my eyebrows.
At that moment, all I ever needed (or thought I needed) was a place I would be able to call home.
I felt like I was at home when I was with my mum, but oddly, I felt a lot more safe and warm when I was being embraced up by Harry, as much as I did not want to admit it.
I took steady steps towards the "big road" Erin was talking about, and while doing that, I grabbed my phone and dialed my management.
Or should I just fetch a taxi?
My thoughts were broken when a drop of what seemed like water fell onto the bridge of my nose.
-"What?", I whispered, looking up at the usual grayish-light blue sky. The only difference was that this time, the sky was actually a bit cloudier.
I frowned and groaned. Luckily, I was not wearing heavy makeup but just mascara and lipgloss.
When I finally got to the big road, I realized cars were travelling like the cities of New York. Cars honking their horns and buses dodging the cars.
I spotted four taxis coming, but three were taken up and one picked up a woman with two kids.
I pressed my lips into a straight line and covered my head with my hand, attempting to stop the rain from wetting all my hair.
My sweater was made up of wool, so rain and my sweater were definitely not was I was looking forward to experiencing.
I waited for a while, and my sympathy let three people take the taxis that had stopped infront of me.
-"Would you like to have a ride?", I heard. I looked to my side and saw a chest. A chest?
I gazed up and found a guy, a bit taller than Harry, holding an umbrella and smiling brightly at me.
-"No, thanks", I answered.
-"Well, I'll stay here holding the umbrella for a while then", he firmly said.
I looked up at him with a curious face.
Why is he trying to help me? Does he know who I am? Is he some kind of life ruiner who is trying to make me look like a slut? Does he have a group of paparazzis ready to take pictures of me with him?
-"What's your name?", he asked.
-"You don't know who I am?", I asked, startled out of my thoughts.
-"Sorry, no. But I saw some people sneaking pictures of you and thought they were dangerous", he said.
-"They're paparazzis, that's all. Don't worry", I said.
-"Paparazzis? Who are you?", he chuckled.
-"Jade Thrilwall. I am in a girl band, and my... A known person I am close to, is Harry Styles from a boy band", I wanted to say fiancé, but forced myself not to.
-"Nice to meet you, I'm Joseph Smedley. I came from Australia a year ago", he said, sticking out his hand infront of me. I shook it and smirked at him.
Actually, his company was not that bad. His comforting facial expressions made him look cute, but his dimples only made me miss Harry.
-"Are you waiting for a taxi or someone specifically?", he questioned.
-"Oh, I was waiting for a taxi", I sighed.
-"You're famous aren't you? Why don't you have your own limo or something?", he asked.
-"Our band won just a few weeks ago, and we like to take it easy. We don't like to look wealthy", I said.
He pouted his lips and nodded in approval.
-"Clever", he whistled.
Time passed by, and he never stopped telling me how great it was for him to be in England.
It was nice though. His conversations were interesting and pretty entertaining. He even asked for my number, but he told me he met a girl he really liked so I was free of drama.
-"Look, a free taxi!", he alarmed, pointing at the road.
-"Finally!", I exclaimed.
-"Thank you Joseph, for staying with me", I said.
-"My pleasure. It was nice meeting you, Jade Thirlwall", I said.
I grinned at him and straightened my hand to the road as the taxi approached.
-"Bye, Joseph Smedley", I giggled, waving ay him and swooping into the car.
I gave the man the direction and looked back to wave at Joseph.
Right then, I realized there was a tall figure of a very familiar man I knew.
His hair was damp, along with his white shirt and black skinny jeans.
I narrowed my eyebrows and focused on the person, but before I figured if it was officially him, he ran off and hid behind the alley.
I tilted my head and the taxi drove off.
Was he?
...
I arrived to the building and payed the taxi driver.
-"Thank you, have a lovely day", I thanked.
-"You too, miss", he said.
I hopped off and entered the lobby.
It was still raining when I went up the elevator.
I got off on our floor and opened the door.
The first thing I did was throw my sweater off myself and slip into one of Harry's.
-"I miss you", I whispered to myself.
I was officially the most desperate and miserable girl. I was lost without Harry.
-"Hello?", I answered the phone, without even realizing someone had called me. My consciousness was too distracted by the thought of him.
-"Pickle! Where are you?", Jesy's voice pounded through my ear.
-"At home", I forced myself to say.
Home? Yeah, sure. My selfishness was nagging for my real home, Harry.
-"Oh, that's good. There were pictures of you all over twitter waiting for a taxi while talking to a guy", she said.
-"Damn it", I groaned, tears pressing out of my eyes.
The stress was horrible. It was nothing compared to the stress I had at school, but it was outrageous.
The way I felt so miserable without him made me go sick and pale. It made me wonder how I actually handled being away from him for so many weeks.
-"We'll all get through this together Jade", Jesy said.
-"Oh God", I said, my voice shattering.
-"Would you like me to go?", Jesy offered.
-"Please no, Jess. It's fine, I think I want to be alone right now. Thanks though, bye", I quickly muttered, hanging up and turning my phone off, throwing it onto the sofa on the process.
Making my way into the kitchen, I got a box of Jaffacakes and shuffled towards the living room.
I sat on the sofa and saw my reflection on the TV.
I was so skinny, too skinny for someone to actually like me.
Too skinny and too ugly for someone like Harry to like me.
Too skinny and too boring for someone like Harry to love me.
Too skinny and too worthless for anyone to want me.
I started to breathe heavily, my hands trembling and struggling to open the box of biscuits.
I ripped off the package and stuffed some into my mouth.
-"Too skinny", I whispered.
I hated myself. How could I seriously go from happy to... this?
-"Too worthless", I cried.
As Harry's sweater got a bit dirty because of the chocolate, I dropped the biscuit onto the carpet and frantically tried to wipe it off.
Unfortunately, all I did was expand the brown smudge on his soft sweater.
-"Oh no", I squealed.
You're running out of control, Jade.
I closed my eyes and breathed.
-"It's okay", I said, but my eyes travelled to my reflection.
-"It's not okay, look at you", my own reflection said, staring at me with daring eyes.
-"It's enough", I insisted.
-"It's not Jade", my reflection chuckled.
-"I am okay!", I shrieked, only making my reflection laugh at me.
I was definitely going insane.
-"Your madness is returning", she hissed.
I whined and covered my ears with my hands, which only made the voice louder.
I hate this. I hate it.
-"Cut", my reflection demanded.
-"It will make you perfect", she whispered, as if it was a great secret I did not have to spread.
The doorbell rang, and the voice stopped speaking.
I stood up. I mean, my body stood up. My mind was still lost in the craziness my brain held.
I opened the door and stared blankly at the man I had been missing so badly.
-"Harry", I breathed, making my way to home.